Your erotic stories

I hadn’t even wanted to go on the Senior camping trip. It all seemed so fake. But after the guys on the basketball team begged me, and after my parents badgered me that it was ‘part of the experience’ I finally agreed. I felt like I would have been fine if we stopped the high-school bullshit and just lined up for a diploma, but nope. Senior overnight it was.

Before I went, my father rambled about his Senior camping trip, and he told me about something he had never shared before.

“Oh Jason, it’s awful! We were kids though, and we were just having fun, no one really got hurt. We’d stay up very late, and the football team would work in conjunction with the cheerleading squad and pick a boy and a girl from the tents. We’d take them out to this little island in the middle of the stream and lock them in this little shed. They were usually the shyer kids, and we wanted to help them along. The Goats.”

I glanced up at him. I mostly took after my mother, thank god. There was still hope that I wouldn’t suffer his shiny bald head that had started to thin at the ripe age of 23. I ran my fingers through my hair self-consciously while asking. “The Goats? You called these kids goats?”

He shrugged and laughed. He was trying not to laugh too hard, but failing. I loved my father, but I loved him a little less for how hard he laughed at those poor kids that he had locked up in that shed. The Goats.

I was starting to believe I would never be able to come out to him.

“Well, yeah. It was a tradition a long time before we came along. They probably put a stop to it a while ago, afraid of angry parents and whatnot. People need to stop being so darn concerned… We were just kids having fun.”

I almost believed that he was making it up. I had never heard about this apparent tradition before, and it just seemed too cruel. Maybe the tradition had been alive when my dad was a kid, but not now. The jocks at my school weren’t like jocks in a TV sitcom or coming-of-age drama. We weren’t a bunch of stupid cows who pushed freshmen into lockers or pantsed smart kids. No way any of my friends would do something as cruel and petty as lock two unpopular kids in a shed. Surely we had evolved.

—

At noon as the school buses dropped off three hundred and twenty squawking teenagers, the debauchery began. People had brought alcohol, weed, pills, and condoms, and they were determined to use as many of them as they could before the buses came back to pick us up at twelve the next day.

The chaperones were outnumbered, outgunned, and exhausted already. They ended up sitting all together at a picnic table on the game field as we spread out. The industrial-grade tents were stacked in a massive pile by the treeline, to be erected and filled by four people each when the sun went down. The field was long and narrow. As wide as a football field but stretching the length of eight or nine. It stretched from the dirt road and the industrial-grade tents at one end and the stream at the other, surrounded on all sides by pine trees.

I walked over to the tallest hill on the field and looked around. A few industrious seniors were in the process of setting up their four-man tents. People were shucking shirts and shorts to get down to bathing suits and flip flops. Some rushed for the stream to wet their feet (it only came up waist-high) and others started games of soccer, frisbee, 500, and one manic group of hipsters with hacky-sacks. Some had brought radios, and around each radio the games congregated.

The needs of three hundred and twenty teenagers and ten harried adults were met by a veritable mountain of coolers (filled with saran-wrapped sandwiches) and a line of six green port-a-potties.

I grinned. This wasn’t nearly as bad as I had thought. I stripped out of my t-shirt to feel the sun on my back. A girl walking by in tiny cutoff shorts and an orange bikini top did a double take and I grimaced inwardly. On the outside, I smiled and waved.

—

As the day went on, I got out of my cynical funk and started to just have fun. I played soccer with a group of guys from the basketball team for an hour or so. I had a dinner of two pre-wrapped roast beef sandwiches and a bottle of powerade. As the sun was hovering just above the treeline, I stripped into my swim trunks and kicked off my sneakers. I felt hot and sweaty and sticky, and there were a lot fewer people in the stream now that the chaperones were passing out dinner.

I wove my way around the maze of beach towels (some with half-naked sunbathers, some without) and stepped into a tiny sandy bank of the stream. When I glanced downstream, I was reminded of my father’s story. I couldn’t see a hut anywhere; maybe it had been taken down since my father’s ‘glory years’.

I waded into the stream. Our gym teacher, Mrs. Dresden waved at me. She was a chaperone and she stayed at the stream on the off chance that someone was stupid enough to try and drown in the shallow gentle current.

I was up to the deepest point in this section of the stream. My feet sank into soft cold muck and the weeds wound sinuously around my calves and knees. The water level came to about halfway between my navel and nipples. I dunked in the water, gasping at how good it felt.

I decided to go and set up my tent. I was tent-mates with two other guys from the basketball team and the quarterback of the football team. They would want to stay up all night, and if they did get tired, they would most likely be too drunk to fix up the tent. To my knowledge, Ben, Bjorn, and Tim had all brought booze.

I was watching the ground to avoid stepping on towels and girls when I ran headlong into Caleb Greene.

I was a lot bigger then him, and while I just stumbled a bit he fell down hard, right on top of a reclining girl in a purple bikini.

Caleb flushed bright red from the roots of his pale hair to the neckline of his baggy t-shirt. He struggled to get off, mumbling an apology and looking absolutely terrified as the girl woke up and started cussing at him.

I was astonished at her mouth. I couldn’t remember her name, but whenever she talked to me she always acted really sweet and shy. I guess I knew now that it was an act.

I grabbed his shoulder to help him up, and to her I said. “It was an accident, calm the fuck down!”

She saw me and flushed. “Sorry, Jason!” She said meekly as Caleb and I walked away, my hand still on his shoulder.

I released him. His skin was still flushed with embarrassment. “S-Sorry.” He whispered, playing with the hem of his shirt. He had oversized wire-rim glasses that were always falling down his thin nose. The shirt was long, almost to his knees, and he was wearing baggy cargo pants with the cuffs rolled up and sneakers with peeling soles. The left one was flapping, and the right one had duct tape looped around the tip of his shoe twice. He had worn that same pair of shoes for the last two years, even in winter when he had to tramp through several feet of snow. They hadn’t even been new when he got them.

“Hey, no problem, I wasn’t looking where I was going. Where have you been? I don’t think I’ve seen you all day.”

I think I went out of my way to try and be nice to Caleb. He had a couple of friends, mostly girls, but for the most part he was a very lonely kid. A lot of people made fun of him. Nothing really vicious, they weren’t hurting him or anything, but it was just a string of nasty things people kept saying to him. Cold shoulders, cruel snide comments, insinuating that he was queer, or that he wet the bed, or mean stuff about how poor he was. Other stuff like that. It made me uncomfortable. I never said anything, but I had never done anything to stop it, so I felt guilty.

I had maybe had six conversations with the guy. Each one had been me asking him questions like how his day went, or what he was up to. He would usually answer briefly and nervously. I always had this feeling like he thought I was trying to make fun of him, so he didn’t trust me.

He looked up at me and pushed his glasses up his nose. “Um… I’ve been reading in the woods.” He murmured.

I waited for more, but no more was coming. “What book?”

He reached into the pocket of his baggy cargo pants and pulled out a fat little novel to show me the title. “The Long Walk? Shit, I read that one! Could you imagine?”

He smiled a little, and it was really sweet. That was the only word I could think of. “Yeah, I’d probably be the first one out. Um…. You like to read, Jason?”

I shrugged. “A bit. Mostly Stephan King, and some stuff I had when I was younger. Y’know; The Edge Chronicles, Hunger Games, Bartimaeus trilogy, the Pendragon series. Kid stuff. Most of the time I see you, you’re reading something really smart, like the complete works of Shakespeare, or War and Peace, or stuff by Charles Dickens. I feel pretty stupid, I can’t read books unless they’ve been made pretty recently.”

He flushed deeper and shrugged, but he was relaxing a little. That was nice, the poor guy was always so tense. He deserved to relax on the Senior Camp day.

He was putting the book back in the pocket of his cargo pants when he asked, “Um… Do you want to go and… Ah… get some din–”

We had been walking across the grassy field, me barefoot and dripping, carrying my towel, shirt, and shoes in a bundle in my arms, him fully clothed with his hands stuffed deep into his pockets. Neither of us had been paying much attention, and all of my air came out in a near-silent WOOF as Timothy Jurgen, the star Quarterback tackled me while screaming maniacally at the top of his lungs.

We rolled and wrestled on the ground. Tim had been my friend since grade school. We didn’t hang around as much as we used to before he got a girlfriend, but we still hung out now and then. He had brought a big bag of weed that he was going to share later when it got dark.

When we got up, laughing, I looked over at Caleb and felt immediately guilty. He was a few feet away, biting his lip and edging away quietly. He looked so lonely. I forgot that Tim loved to bait Caleb.

“Hey, Caleb you don’t have to go. We can go over to the coolers and you can grab a sandwich. I already had a couple.” I wrested out of Tim’s grip and Tim laughed.

“It’ll be nice being able to eat a whole sandwich and not having to split it with a dozen sisters and the dogs!” Tim snorted.

I was shocked, really. Tim had said some pretty mean stuff to him in the past, but that was just way over the top. I pushed him roughly. “Hey, quit it man. That isn’t cool.” Tim was still laughing. I realized that he was already wasted.

When I turned around to try and talk to Caleb he was already walking away in a stiff fast stride, head down. He turned a little and I could see part of his face. It looked like he was really upset.

Tim laughed harder. “Man, you shoulda seen your face! Whats up with you today anyway? Hanging around the welfare-fag and letting him make googly-eyes at you?”

For a second, the rage built up inside of me and it was blind and searing. For a second I didn’t know if I was going to try and hurt him. But then the second passed and the blinding hatred just sort of smoldered out. I felt tired, and disgusted. What was wrong with him? What had Caleb ever done to him?

I had been having fun, but now I just felt like a bastard.

Tim was starting to look sorry. He was a slow bastard, but he could catch on eventually. “Hey man, I’m sorry. Its just that I’ve been out in the woods with Bjorn and Ben, and you know how much of an asshole I get when I’m drunk. We cool man?”

No. No we were not ‘cool’. But I was all for trying to smooth this down. Tim was going to college in St. Timothy’s next year, and I was going to Mankato. That was a good hundred and fifty miles between us. I only had to tolerate this juvenile bullshit for a few months at most.

“Yeah bro.” I answered tersely, looking to see if I could spot Caleb. He was sitting by himself at the treeline. Not reading, not relaxing, just sitting with his back turned. I had this awful sick feeling that Tim had made him cry. That was beyond low.

“Hey Jase, grab a couple of sandwiches and meet me by the stream. I brought some prime-o stuff and Bjorn brought a hookah. We’re gonna get as high as the fuckin moon!” After a moment’s thought, he added. “If you see Sigourney or Hazel, invite them. They’re cool, and they’re on the pill!”

He cackled and bounced off towards the stream. I glanced over at Caleb, and he turned his head quickly, as if he had been looking at me and I had caught him staring. I really wanted to go over, and try to apologize, but in the end I just chickened out and snuck four ham sandwiches from the cooler when the chaperone wasn’t looking.

I sent one more look his way, and this time I caught him staring at me. He ducked his head, but for that split second of eye contact, I felt my cock twitch.

I felt heat creeping into my own cheeks as I darted towards the stream. At this point, I didn’t care if all of my friends were assholes. Soon I would get to leave them, and right now I just wanted to get (in Tim’s words) high as the fucking moon.

—

I didn’t smoke cigarettes like a lot of my friends. I also didn’t smoke a lot of weed, only about five or six times. Hookah was the way to go. I had only gotten high off of a water pipe once before and the steam had been smooth going down and I had gotten an incredible high.

I hoped that the cannabis would put me in a friendlier mood.

I walked up the stream (easily darting out of Mrs. Dresden’s line of vision) and eventually, I got to the circle.

In the dying light, they looked like they were performing some arcane rite. Twelve guys (mostly from the football team, I only saw two guys that weren’t) and four girls circling a small hookah with one pipe. I could smell the ripe skunky pot-smell laced with some kind of flavored tobacco. Some of them had that stupid hit-between-the-eyes expression of the massively stoned, and others were still waiting for it to hit.

The circle was in the middle of the stream on this little grassy sandy sliver that couldn’t have been more then five yards wide and ten yards long. I put my shirt back on as I felt a humid breeze and I waded across. The water was so shallow here that I barely wet the bottoms of my swim trunks.

—

Mellow. I was thoroughly mellowed out, every muscle in my body felt as if it had been soaked in hot water and relaxed. I was aware of how angry I was at Tim, but it seemed distant.

One of the girls, Sigourney, caught my attention.

“Yeah, I’ve always wanted to do the Goat thing. My mom never shut up about it. My aunt was one of the Goats and that’s how she met my uncle, crazy, right?”

My dad was wrong, I guess the Goats was a tradition that was still firmly kept.

Hazel laughed long and loud. Through her giggles, she finally managed to say. “Who’re we gonna pick? Ooh! How about that Tameisha Bitch!”

Sigourney shook her head wisely. “Nah, Tameisha’s got a crazy boyfriend. He would kill whatever poor fuck we locked in with her. What about that fat chick, Bethany?”

Maybe it was because I was high, but the two of them were starting to look like harpies. All claws and beaks and scaly wings and high mocking laughter.

A third girl spoke up. The fourth was in the bushes with Bjorn somewhere. “We can’t do the Goats this year, remember? The chick last year got preggers, so now the chaperones guard the girl’s tents like fuckin’ hawks.”

Everyone was sad. So fucking depressed that we couldn’t find two sad unpopular kids and force them into a box together. I was starting to lose my mellow. The mellow feeling was already halfway to nowhere.

“Where is the hut, anyway?” I muttered. I was curious.

Bjorn came out of the bushes, buckling his belt with Samantha giggling and skipping behind him. “My brother graduated last year. It’s a quarter of a mile downstream. It’s this old concrete bunker, no one knows what it was for, but all of the windows are boarded up tight and the door is made of steel. I brought the fuckin’ padlock and we wont be able to use it.

Even through the weed. Even through the sublime mellowness, I was starting to get angry.

I didn’t want to stay anymore. Half of the guys were gone already, so I decided to go back and see if I couldn’t just lay low in the tent for a while. Maybe jerk off or something, then go to sleep.

I was cutting through the woods when I heard something crashing. I veered over that way, my mind foggy with weed and wondering if someone was hurt.

When I saw them, my mind just went blank with fury.

It was the six guys who had left the party. They were laughing and drunk, and between Tim and a linebacker named Perry, was Caleb. Barefoot and stumbling and looking absolutely terrified. He was just wearing his baggy shirt and some underwear, the hem fell to his knees like a dress. Each of them had one of his arms and they were half-lifting him.

I walked in and started calling Tim names. I was kind of woozy from the pot. I could hear my voice as if I was someone else. “Tim! You stupid motherfucker, what the fuck are you doing to him! Huh? You fucking motherfucker!”

They were laughing. They thought I was funny. Caleb called out my name in a scared voice. I swung at Tim, but he dodged easily. He was much better at keeping cool under the influence then I was. Two of his buddies, Vincent, and a balding guy the size of a mountain grabbed my arms to hold me still. I was stronger then Caleb, and I fought, but they tackled me and held me down.

Tim knelt down so he could look me in the eye. I saw Caleb, his scratched dirty feet dangling as Perry held him up in a bear hug. He looked so scared, and he was kicking Perry ineffectually with his muddy feet.

“Calm down Jason!” Tim bellowed. I shook my head to try and clear some of the fog out of it. He’s a Goat! They do this every year, it never hurt nobody!”

I could see Caleb’s pallid frightened face. He looked naked without his glasses. I remembered what the girl had said about the girl who had gotten pregnant. No one got hurt? Bullshit.

He just kept going.

“Besides, if anyone deserves to be the Goat, it’s this perv. Do you know what we found on him? He was all alone in his tent reading some book and he was using this as a bookmark.

Caleb started to struggle frantically. Perry slid his hand over Caleb’s mouth, muffling the panicked cries of “NO! No No No!!!!”

My eyes focused on the picture in front of my eyes. It was a color shot of me at a basketball game. I felt a weird doubling sensation, not deja vu, but a rapid shift in perspective. Vincent and the mountain-man loosened their grip on me and I took the picture. I had my legs in a stance, I was blocking a kid from Cedar Rapids. My face was dripping with sweat and my eyes were glaring and my mouth was a tight line of determination. My thick black hair was shorter then, and stuck up in sweaty spikes.

I looked up at Caleb, and he went limp in Perry’s arms, closing his eyes and turning his head away. I was shocked and high, I couldn’t think of anything to say as we started walking back to the smoker’s ring. I was just staring down at the picture of me and feeling strange and flushed and vulnerable.

—

Tim found out that there could be no female Goat. And he was pissed off.

Caleb had stopped struggling. He was like a small animal surrounded by predators; trembling, closing his eyes, not responding to anything.

My head was starting to clear from the weed. I wished fiercely that I had my senses. If I had been lucid, I could have run and gotten help.

I watched Samantha walk towards Perry. He had both of Caleb’s skinny wrists in his hands. Caleb was standing as far away from Perry as he could, his head down so his blonde hair covered his face.

“Fucking pervert.” She snarled. “Freak.” Then she spat on him. He flinched when the gob of saliva landed in his hair.

That snapped me out of it. The picture didn’t matter, they were torturing this poor kid. There was no other word for it.

“You stupid bitch.” I snarled, feeling satisfaction when her smug face crumpled. “Tim! Let him go. You can’t do the Goats this year. It’s sick and pointless! Look at him, he’s scared out of his fucking mind!”

I don’t know what I expected, but not this. Tim stepped forward, his face a mask of rage. He backhanded me across the face and my reflexes were too slow to block, dodge, or even tense up for it. I could feel my neck creak.

I looked up at him from the ground, dazed and just starting to feel the fierce sting.

“You’re a self-righteous prick, Jason! You know that? For the last six months you’ve been treating us all like dirt! You think that just because you’ve been taking college courses, that you’re big and mature and that the rest of us are just dumb kids!”

I saw the anger and hurt in his eyes, and I felt cold. He was going to say it. I knew it. When we were fourteen he had promised that he would never tell anyone, but now he was going to say it to everybody.

He kicked me first. I got to tense for this one, but I still got the toe of his sneaker right in the ribs. “Y’know what Jason? Since you’re so hot and bothered about us scaring your boyfriend here, you can be the Goat!”

Some of them were laughing, too stoned to be serious. Others were looking confused and a little scared. Samantha had a shocked and vindictive look on her face. Then Tim said it.

“Besides, you’re a faggot, too, that’s gotta count for something.”

Everything went cold and numb. Except for my cheek and eye, which felt hot and swollen. Everyone was looking at him except Caleb, who made a desperate bid for freedom while Perry was distracted. He stumbled off of the little sliver of an island and tried to run through the water that nearly reached his crotch. Perry grabbed him again with pitiful ease. Now Caleb was in a full-nelson in front of Perry. He was wet, and he was trying as hard as he could not to cry.

Tim glared at me where I was curled upon the ground. “I was over at his place when we were still in middle school. He showed me some freak porn and tried to jerk me off.”

They were all looking at me now. Samantha was shaking her head.

Bjorn stepped forward and whooped loudly. “Yeah, the Goats 2011!! Faggot Edition!”

Tim let out a hard smile and started to cheer with them. The balding mountain-sized guy, his name was Gordon. I could remember that now. He dragged me to my feet and we started to march down the stream.

—

The sun was already well down. It was about midnight, and there was only the light of the moon. The air was humid and cool. I could hear thunder in the distance, and the wind was picking up. They were joking.

That’s what struck me the most. They had divulged my deepest darkest secret. They had humiliated Caleb. They were planning on locking us in a filthy concrete shack until morning. And they thought it was funny.

I could see the hut when the clouds scuttled away from the moon. It was on a sliver of land much like the one we had smoked hookah on. The walls were obscured with graffiti. It was an ugly concrete box with a rust-red door.

I hadn’t thought that this night could get any worse, but I was wrong.

I had been quiet, trying to shift my weight so I could kick Gordon. I jerked off-balance when I heard Caleb let out a hoarse cry and I turned around to see. Caleb was small and skinny, Perry had been taking care of him with ease, but now it took him, Bjorn, and a guy I didn’t know to hold him down. I heard ripping cloth, and suddenly his shirt was gone, and all he had was a pair of grey briefs with a big hole in the side.

Before I could think to escape, they started yanking my clothes off. They got my shirt off in one piece, but my swim trunks tore. I was naked, and they were yanking at even my shoes and socks.

The guys around me were focused on stripping me, but over by Caleb they were laughing. When I looked over, Caleb had a hand covering his crotch, but they were making fun of his size. They were shoving me inside the hut. I could clearly hear Tim.

“What are you?” Tim mocked. “Fuckin’ twelve?”

Gordon kicked me behind my knee. It hurt like hell, he wasn’t wearing sneakers, he was wearing heavy workboots. I fell, my left leg crumpling under me. The concrete was cold and rough and dirty under my knees.

They shoved Caleb in after me, and he fell on top of me. I could feel his damp skin and bony joints and hard bunched muscles as he recoiled and jumped off.

The door slammed shut, and I could hear the metal click of the lock sliding into place.

—

The only light in the hut came from a crack in the ceiling. It was moonlight even then. I could hear thunder in the distance, and closer, I could hear Caleb breathing. His breathing was thick and jagged. He was trying to be quiet, but he was still crying.

I shivered. I couldn’t see a damn thing, but there had to be something in here. Anything to help cover him up.

Caleb had crammed himself into one corner of the ten by ten foot concrete box. I searched the ground carefully with my fingers. I had a sudden horrible image of cutting my fingers on a used needle, and after that I was even more tentative.

Not a thing. Not a goddamn thing.

My eyes were starting to adjust slightly. I could see him curled into a ball in the corner. His legs were folded in front of him, and his arms hung limply in between to cover his crotch. His head hung low, his forehead resting on his drawn-up knees.

My voice sounded hoarse to me when I spoke. “Hey, Caleb?”

He choked out a sob. “I’m sorry.” He mewed.

I shivered. The night had seemed mild and chilly, but now I was naked and wet. It was starting to rain, the sound of the raindrops on the roof was soothing. I could hear water dripping in through the crack in the ceiling.

“Caleb.” I whispered. “Just don’t worry about it. I’m sorry that you got mixed up in all of this.”

I didn’t want to upset him when he was already so miserable, so I tried not to act angry about the picture. But I was angry about the picture. Confused and angry and violated.

Wind was whistling in through the cracks. It was a real storm brewing out there. I flinched and yelped as water hit my toes. For a second I panicked, thinking that the stream had risen to our level and would flood the cabin, but then I relaxed. I had just been touched by the puddle from the rain leaking through the roof.

I curled up into a tight ball like Caleb, hugging my knees to my chest and shivering. My feet and butt were numb with cold from the concrete floor. Eventually, Caleb’s soft crying ceased. It was dead silent as we huddled on opposite sides of the room. After a while I started to hear his teeth clicking together. A soft chattering that just made it feel even colder.

I winced when I stretched out my legs. “Caleb?” I whispered hoarsely. There was barely any light in here, but my eyes had adjusted, and I could see his dim form flinch as I spoke.

“Yeah?” He whispered.

“Are you cold?”

He let out a weak rusty laugh. “Yes Jason. I’m really fucking cold.” He wanted it to be sarcastic and biting, but his voice was weak and and tired. His voice hitched slightly, and he sounded like a tired kid.

“I’m really fucking cold t-too.” I chattered back. “Is it okay if we sit together?”

No answer. “Um… Okay.” He sounded frightened, apprehensive. I crawled over, using one hand to cover my crotch as I did.

He curled up tight in his corner, looking at me with apprehension and nervous fear.

I turned so my back was facing him, shivering. “Just lean against me, kay? We’ll be warmer that way.”

I gasped as he leaned back against me. His thin back was cold and clammy from resting against the concrete wall. We shivered, back to back. It helped a little. I could feel him breathe, feel the little blunt points of his spine and shoulders dig into my skin.

“How did you get that picture?” I asked quietly. “I’m not angry. I just want to know how you got it.”

He leaned back slightly and I felt the back of his head on the back of my neck. His hair was soft and warm. “I’m in the school newspaper.” He whispered. “One of the photography kids made prints of the Cedar Rapid game, and I just took one of the copies.” After a pause, he said. “You got five shots in that game.”

He sniffled. “I j-just wanna go home. I don’t know why I did this in the first p-place. I’m s-s-sorry J-Jason.” He started to cry.

“When did you start stalking me?” I didn’t mean for it to come out like that. It sounded harsh and flat on my tongue.

Caleb was quiet. “When I was in sixth grade, Tim was bullying me. I used to be in boy scouts with him, and that’s when he started making fun of me. He made fun of me because I have twelve sisters and I live in a shitty trailer home and I get free lunch because I’m poor. He used to laugh at my shitty clothes… He still laughs at my shitty clothes. I quit boy scouts when I was in sixth grade because of you.”

He took a deep shuddering breath. “One night at a lock-in, he brought his best friend who wasn’t in scouts. You. Tim started making fun of me because I was wearing hand-me downs from my sisters. Pink sneakers and a purple shirt with a butterfly on it. You smacked him, right on the mouth and demanded that we switched shirts.”

I was starting to remember it now.

“You had this Timberwolves jersey, and it was really big on me. My shirt was so tight on you that it ripped later on when we played floor hockey. You wouldn’t let me give the shirt back, and you told me to keep it. Tim didn’t make fun of me all night.”

“You’ve been following me since then?” I asked quietly. Now that I was really thinking, a lot of things started making sense. He had chosen a lot of my same classes. He always sat at a lunch table a little further away then my table. In sixth grade, he had started coming to my church. Not his family (though he dragged one or two of his sisters along now and then) just him.

“Don’t worry.” Caleb’s voice was soft and tearful. “After this, I’m gonna stay here to try and get a job, and you’re going to college. I never want to see anyone from h-here again!”

“You can say that again.” I said bitterly.

We were quiet for a little while. He was shivering, I was shivering, but his back was starting to feel warmer with our combined body heat.

I was half-dozing when he spoke. “Are you… Have you ever been with a guy before?”

I stretched my legs, hearing my knees pop and crackle. “No. Have you?”

He didn’t answer the question. He just asked another. “Are you mad at me?”

I took a deep breath. “Right now, the only people I’m angry at are the fucking idiots in our school that still do this barbaric Shit. Have you?” I was curious, but I expected the answer to be no.

He paused before answering. “When I was fifteen.”

I think he could feel my shock. I turned around to look at him. He was hugging his knees to his chest. He shifted slightly and the bumps in his spine dug in. He looked at me and for the first time I saw a faint wary pride in his eyes. “What? You just assumed that I was a virgin because everyone at my school hates me?”

He was angry. That anger had festered deep within him, without an outlet. I was surprised, and wounded by his anger.

“They were right. You just walk through this place like a prince. You look down on everyone and you think that you’re better, and that everyone here is running in circles. You needed this, to take you down a notch.” The hurt in his voice was raw and toothed.

I didn’t have anything to say to that. I tried. “I’m sorry Caleb.”

He curled up. “It’s not me you have to deal with. You were mostly right. Maybe these people will grow up in a few years and shake their heads and feel guilty about locking us up. But they’ll still feel satisfied. After all, it was just a couple of queers, right?”

He just sounded tired now. But so bitter.

I found myself in a position that I had rarely been in. I wanted to make him like me. I had been flayed with my shortcomings in front of everyone I had thought of on some level as my friends. I wanted to change the subject, to talk with him as equals, anything.

“I almost did, once.” I said quietly.

He was curious. There is a bitter pleasure in making someone hurt, in humbling someone, and I could feel him struggling with that. He was torn between hearing my story and giving me the cold shoulder.

I just kept talking. “It was spring in eighth grade. I was fourteen, and Tim was fifteen. He got held back a year in sixth grade.”

He turned around. “Really?” I grinned and nodded, happy that he was talking to me. His face was so close to mine. Without his glasses to hide his face, I was surprised at how attractive he was. He had clear flawless skin and high cheekbones and a soft dimple in his chin. His eyes were wide and clear and blue, surrounded by dark blonde lashes.

We both abruptly looked forward again. My cheeks flushed. “Anyway, we had a sleepover, and we were watching a movie in my basement. I snuck into my parent’s room and looked through the movies that they thought were too mature for me to watch. I picked one at random, and it was ‘A Clockwork Orange’.”

“I saw that. It’s one of my favorites.”

I nodded, feeling the back of my head touch the back of his head. “It was a scene later in the movie. The part after Alex goes through the treatments, and they’re torturing him with that woman. The one who had purple hair and was only wearing her underwear. Tim was really… He had a boner, and I tried to touch him.”

Caleb shuddered. I couldn’t tell if he was cold, or just shivering at the idea of trying to jerk off Tim. “I got my hand in his pants and he didn’t freak out. I thought he was okay with it. He was panting. But when I tried to kiss him he hit me. He ran upstairs, and he slammed the door so hard that pictures fell off the walls. Mom ran down and found out what I was watching, and I got grounded.” I felt anti-climactic, the worst storyteller ever. “That was it. The grand sexual history of the biggest asshole at Chamberlain High.”

“How come you guys are still friends?”

I snorted bitterly. “Not friends after this. But we just started hanging out again during soccer practice that summer. We just never talked about it again.”

Caleb sighed. It was a big sigh, and I could feel it rearranging the bones of his back. He leaned back with a little more weight and I did the same. I was glad that I was leaning against him, I felt less cold, but more then that. I was glad that I had someone to touch.

His voice was soft and blank, almost monotone. I hadn’t heard him speak, really talk since we got in this shed. Never heard him string together sentences. He had a very good voice, soft and husky and warm. “When I was fifteen, I had sex with my neighbor. He was thirty-two. He was a construction worker, and I saw him working on the roads near the school. He would take off his shirt, and he would glisten in the sun.”

His voice. That soft sweet voice saying those words. I was hard. If he turned around he would see. I drew my knees to my chest with my arms dangling between my legs to cover my crotch, feeling blood rush to my neck and cheeks and forehead and chest and cock.

He shrugged. “I was hanging around, following him. I thought he was my friend. He seduced me and we had sex in the shed in his backyard. Five times. Then he moved and I never heard from him again.”

“Shit.” I whispered. It was getting quieter outside. I could hear a single sleepy bird twittering, and I was excited for a moment, before I remembered that at my house the birds were sometimes awake at three AM. Surreal. For the first time I realized just how surreal this was.

But I was curious. “He was more then twice your age. Weren’t you scared?”

He shrugged, I could feel it. “Yeah. But, I figured… Nevermind.”

I turned my head and I could see the side of his face and his shoulder and the line of his leg. My eyes were adjusted to the dark. “What?”

He shook his head, and said, “I don’t want to talk about it.” With such force and gravity that I knew better then to ask again.

There was a lull again. He was shivering, but wide awake. I wasn’t looking back at him, so I’m not sure how I knew he was awake. Probably I read it in the minute movements of his body against me. My erection slowly faded, and I was relieved. It would be better for us if we just got out of here with nothing else to traumatize us.

I leaned my head back until the back of my skull rested on his shoulder. He did the same, so his head was tilted back, his ear pressing against my ear. When I looked far to my right, I could see the curve of his soft blonde lashes lit up in the faintest of eldritch starlight.

“We’re the worst Goats ever.” I said softly. He chuckled softly. It was good to hear him laugh. I felt kind of fragile after he had chewed me out.

“Jason?” He whispered. His voice was right by my ear, soft and husky. I could feel the tendons in his neck move as his jaw moved, I could feel them against my shoulder. “If I ask you something, will you promise not to get angry?”

“Promise.”

He didn’t ask me anything. What he did was turn his head slightly and kiss the corner of my mouth. It was a quick kiss, over in a moment, but the place where his soft lips had touched me burned, as if by the sun.

Neither of us moved, we were still back to back, our heads draped back over each other’s shoulders. Mine on his left shoulder, his on my left shoulder. My left ear brushed his ear, and I could feel him tensing up slightly.

I couldn’t think of anything to say or do. After a few moments my muscles relaxed and I leaned slightly harder.

“Say something.” He whispered, he begged. I could hear the frightened edge of tears in his voice.

I turned my head. His cheek was soft against my cheek, there was a little stubble, the faint softest kind. I pressed my lips against the corner of his mouth, and I felt him tense up again.

I moved back to my original position. My heart was pounding. There it was, the first time I had ever kissed another guy. He was breathing faster, I could feel it in the way his shoulder blades slid under the skin. We had been naked all night, but now I was more vividly aware that we were naked together, naked and touching. My hands went down to demurely cup my crotch, even though there was no way for him to see it unless we detached, broke off from where we were attached at the back. He couldn’t see it, but I still had to cover my cock, which had engorged partially with blood.

“Jason? I really like you.” His voice was hoarse, rough with emotion.

This time, when he started to turn his head, I turned mine too. I could see his eyes in the dark, like little chips of sky in the middle of this dark dank shed. His mouth was part-open like a soft pink flower. His mouth was beautiful.

We kissed for real. His mouth was soft and warm. I could feel him breathing, I was intimately connected to him. My neck was starting to feel sore from the slightly awkward angle, but I didn’t care. I closed my eyes, and felt his breath feathering on my upper lip from his nose.

His tongue peeked out of his mouth, touching softly against the seam of my lips. I opened my mouth, and our tongues met like nervous animals. I lifted my hand and cradled the back of his head, his hair was matted from rubbing against my head and shoulder, soft, and warm.

I opened my mouth wider, sucking his tongue gently. He made a tiny noise in the back of his throat, a little squeak.

I broke the kiss. “What are we doing?” My head felt dizzy, woozy. The pot had worn off hours ago, I was high on his kiss.

His eyes were sparkling. “Please.” Was all he said.

I shivered a little. “I wish the ground was warmer.” His cheeks flushed, and he leaned forward, breaking the seal between our backs with an audible little ripping noise as our humid skin separated.

He crawled. He was on his hands and knees. I could see his long bony back in the dim moonlight, see his soft pale buttocks, see the way his messy hair dangled over his face and ears. And between his slim thighs, I caught a glimpse of him.

I was still curled up with my knees to my chest and one arm under my knees to keep them there. The other arm reached out to touch his shoulder as he faced me, sitting back on his ankles.

His cheeks were flushed as he bowed his head slightly. “I… I’ll do it. V-Vincent said that I was really good at it.”

I didn’t have to ask him what ‘it’ was, or who Vincent was, and my mouth went dry and my cock throbbed between my legs. I wanted nothing else.

But it wasn’t right, not yet. I could see how he was acting around me, and I didn’t like it.

“Come here.” I whispered, my words almost catching in my throat.

He crawled forward another step and put his hands on my knees, as if to spread them. But I put my hand under his chin and brought him up to my level.

“No,” I whispered. “Up here.” His eyes looked startled, and then our lips were touching again and he made that tiny noise in the back of his throat. He kissed me harder this time, sucking my lower lip between his teeth and biting with a desperation that surprised me and made my heart ram against my rib cage with excitement.

My breathing was more like gasping now.

One of his hands snaked between my thighs and moved my hands away. I gasped as his cold hand tentatively wrapped around my shaft. Now I was making the noises, panting and letting out little moans as he squeezed gently.

He broke the kiss this time. His eyes were sparkling, and he seemed so vital, so alive. I had never seen him like this. He was so sexy like this. How had I never seen how sexy Caleb was before?

“I can make you come so hard you’ll scream.” He whispered.

My breath came out in a ragged gasp. His words were inflaming, inflammable, explosive. I let him spread my thighs and lower his upper body so he was propped up on his elbows, stroking my cock with one small white hand. His face was only a few inches away, and he was squinting slightly, his vision was bad, and he needed to get close. I could feel his breath on my cock.

No one had ever touched me down there, no one had seen me like this. I was gasping and the muscles of my inner thighs were shivering as he gave my cock a few long slow strokes. He didn’t stroke with his palm, but with his fingers, as if trying to map out every vein and curve and line of my cock.

He was focusing on my cock as he poked his tongue from his lips, his tongue was soft and pink and wet. But right as the tip of his tongue touched the opening of my urethra, his eyes darted up. His tongue lit up the nerve endings in my cock and his eyes made me flinch with sensation. I moaned as he lowered his eyes and his mouth, closing his lips around the thick head of my cock to bathe the most sensitive part of me in his warm wet mouth.

I was afraid to touch him right away, but as I leaned slightly back, the muscles in my abdomen taut with the effort of keeping me sitting up, and my thighs spread wide, I rested my hands on him. One hand on his shoulder and one tangled in his hair, stroking, encouraging as I made soft sounds in the back of my throat.

After soaking the tip of my cock in saliva, he moved down, I yipped as the head of my cock hit some sort of resistance, the back of his throat. The resistance yielded and suddenly his lips were buried in my thick dark pubic hair. I was gasping harshly with the sensation. He moved back and took a deep breath, looking up at me with his bright blue eyes.

His hand snaked between my legs and he cradled my ball sack. My balls were close to my body in a slightly wrinkled pouch from the cold. I moaned as he cradled them in his warm palm, squeezing very gently.

With his other hand, he circled the very base of my rock-hard cock. He rubbed my cock with it whenever he came up for air. He got a rhythm going, and I was gasping and moaning in time as he did it.

“Caleb!” I whispered.

I couldn’t help it. I just couldn’t support myself anymore. I fell backwards until I was lying flat on my back, gasping at how cold the concrete floor was against my bare skin.

It was more comfortable, despite the wicked cold of that floor. I bent my knees and kept my thighs far apart and cradled Caleb’s head as he did absolutely evil things with his tongue and teeth. Things that should have been illegal, they felt so good.

I whimpered and stroked his hair. “Caleb! I’m… I’m going to come if you keep going.” There was just something incredibly frightening about that. I was rushing inexplicably fast towards some point of no return. I was going to come in his mouth if I wasn’t careful.

He wasn’t backing away, he kept bobbing his beautiful head between my legs, slurping and sucking and tickling the tip of my cock with his sinfully good tongue.

“Caleb…” I gasped, weakly. “Please, I’m going to come… W-Watch out!”

I moaned and humped my hips, unable to stop. I tried to nudge his head away with my fingertips, but he firmly stayed. Sweat beaded on every surface of my body.

I let out a gasping surprisingly loud cry as my crotch spasmed, right into his mouth. I cringed with horror, but I was lost in the fog of that incredible orgasm.

When I went limp, panting, he rested his head on my stomach. “I told you I could make you scream.” He whispered, looking up at me. I could see my come in his mouth. His shoulder was moving rhythmically, he was jerking off.

Even though I was exhausted, I sat up and put my hands on his shoulders, pulling him up so he was kneeling and I could see him. I could see his rock-hard cock in his hand.

I kissed his mouth, and I could taste my come in it. He was stiff with shock. He hadn’t expected me to be like this, to try and reciprocate. It was smooth, and bitter.

“Don’t jerk off.” I panted, licking the thin glaze of my come from my lips.

He moved his hands away from his crotch, looking dazed. We were both kneeling, my knees slightly spread so his knees were between my legs. I was taller then him kneeling, but I bowed my head and my back so I could kiss his thin white chest. I could feel his chest fluttering with fast excited panting. His skin was damp and salty with sweat and humidity. He had a little rough chest hair, so pale it was almost invisible, right in the center of his chest. He had a little more around his nipples, I could feel it against my lips as I kissed and sucked on those little pink points, making him mewl and writhe slightly.

I had to slap his hands away from his crotch. I grinned up at his astonished face and lust-glazed eyes. “Let me take my time Caleb.” I whispered, licking one tender nipple and feeling him tremble. I had never touched anyone like this. I felt drunk, soaringly high but incredibly sharp.

I moved down his stomach. This felt Right. It felt Real. Real like nothing else in high school had been Real. I licked the rough hairs of his treasure trail where they thickened into his pubic hair. I could feel the tip of his hard upright penis poking me under my chin.

He leaned back, using his hands flat against the floor to prop him up and giving me unrestricted access to his groin. The flat muscles of his stomach were trembling as I wrapped my hand dreamily around his cock.

It was thinner then mine. Thin and hard and hot. The skin was so soft and warm, and I felt the tip of it with my fingertips, feeling how the texture was different on the head, softer, rougher. I felt down to the base where the long wiry blond hairs took root and blossomed into his tuft of pubic hair.

I wished that the light was brighter, then I would be able to see him better, and not have to feel my way around.

I felt under his cock. My testes were in a round pouch that was proportionally small compared to my cock. His hung lower, and were slightly uneven. The skin was softer, and had more fuzz on it. I couldn’t feel the seam between them like the one I had. I cupped them in my hand and weighed them. They were heavy and soft and tender.

He giggled just a little. When I looked up at him, puzzled, he flushed. “Sorry.” He giggled.

“What?” I asked, curious as I gently touched his member, measuring it with my fingertips, quantifying it.

Caleb smiled bashfully, his face twitching slightly with lust as I touched him. “You… You just look so serious. Ah…” That little gasp, watching his face as he made it, the briefest closing of his eyes and opening of his soft pink mouth… It was magical. It made my cock harden again, only minutes after the last time I had come. “You… You look like that when you study for a test, or something.” His face was flushed and sexy. “It’s kinda cute…”

I kissed his stomach. I wanted him to feel good. I hoped I was good at this. I could feel his hand in my hair, wiping it out of my eyes, tangling deep to the roots.

His cock was lying flat against his stomach. I touched my tongue to the base, feeling a single wiry hair against the tip of my tongue. I flattened my tongue and drew out a long lick from the base to the tip, tasting the humid taste of him. The taste of sweat and skin and salt. His skin was so soft and hard and smooth under my tongue. He shuddered and moaned. His slim thighs tightened so they pressed in on either side of my head. I liked the pressure.

When I dipped my tongue around the soft mushroom-head of his glans, I tasted a blob of precome that had leaked from the tip of his cock. It was smooth and slippery and delicious. I loved the taste of it. I took the tip of his cock in my mouth, feeling the warmth and the roughness of the skin on the head, and I burrowed my tongue into the opening of his urethra, trying to taste more of it.

He yelped and pushed at my head, panting. I pulled away. “Sorry!” I panted, rubbing my head against his thigh.

He looked so flushed, so aroused. He was so beautiful. “Um… It’s s-sensitive there…” He stammered.

“Sorry…” I whispered, bowing my head so I could kiss him gently. One kiss on the tip, a line of kisses down the thick tube that made up the underside of his cock. Then I cradled his testes and put one kiss on each soft sac.

I moved back up and put his penis in my mouth, trying to be careful. I didn’t want to scrape his beautiful sensitive cock with my teeth. I bobbed my head slowly up and down, trying to build up a rhythm without choking or scraping him.

“Ah…” He gasped. I looked up and his head was thrown back and he was trembling and his slim beautiful body was bare in the faint ray of moonlight that came in through the crack in the ceiling, he looked down at me and the pupils of his eyes were huge and dilated and beautiful in the dark. His pale blue iris’s were reduced to a strip of blue ribbon around the massive dark beads of his pupils.

I sucked and he moved his hips slightly. His cock kept pressing against the back of my throat, and I couldn’t get the entire thing in. I wrapped my hand around the base of his cock so I could put pressure on every inch of him. I drooled down so I could give my hand some lubricant, and I squeezed and stroked the base of his cock with my hand. I could feel his muscles tensing, trembling.

“Jason!” He whispered, panting. “Please… Please… Jason, I’m going to come!”

I held him down, I bobbed my head up and down on his slender cock. He gasped, and fell backwards until he was lying flat on the cold concrete. I could feel the tube on the base of the cock pulsate, palpitate, and suddenly my mouth was full of his come. Warm and slippery, shockingly bitter. I had done that. I felt a sense of pride, of relief that I had been able to do the same for him that he had done for me.

He shuddered onto his back, tangling his hands in my hair and his chest heaving. I rested my head on his thigh, moving the come around in my mouth, tasting the bitterness. I stroked his other thigh with my hand, and the skin under my fingers felt rough.

I opened my eyes and felt his inner thighs carefully. Each one was rough with thin straight lines. I had never felt anything like it.

He had tensed up. He made a small noise, as if it was physically hurting him when I touched the rough spots on the inside of his legs. I left them alone, and crawled up to his level.

The ground was cold, but I lay down by him, and I wrapped my arms around his thin chest, pulling him close to me, making him the little spoon. He shivered a little and rested his head on my arm.

“You’re warm.” He whispered. His voice was soft and sleepy.

For a second, he had tensed up, but now we were cuddling, and it felt like the most natural thing in the world. His body was slim and hard, but he was soft in some places. His buttocks, pressed so frankly and unashamedly against my crotch, felt so soft and warm. My limp penis was resting between them.

His hair smelled sweet and damp, like cheap soap. I kissed the back of his neck at the hairline, and we dozed. The floor was cold, but we were warm from sex and each other, and we shared more body heat this way then we had back-to-back.

“Am I dreaming?” He whispered. He sounded as dazed as I felt.

I kissed his shoulder. “I don’t know… It feels like it.”

He took my hand from where it was resting on his chest, and he kissed my fingertips. It was a tender gesture, and it brought a stirring of life to my groin. He had to feel it, my cock was against his ass, there was no space between us.

“I hope I’m awake Jason. I hope this isn’t a dream.” He sounded like he was on the verge of crying. He knew he was awake, but I knew what he meant.

“Caleb?”

He sniffled a little. “Yeah?”

“I… What are those rough spots on your legs?” I was going to say something else, but the question popped out.

“Scars.”

“From what?”

He cuddled into me, scooting back so he could be pressed further into my chest. He tangled his legs in mine and trapped one of my feet between both of his. He held my hand to his chest, and I could hear his heart beating. He was holding me close, like a kid wrapping a security blanket around their shoulders, or squeezing a teddy bear.

“I… When I was a kid I used to cut myself.”

I was shocked, though I tried not to show it. My budding erection slipped away, and my cock was limp against his ass. I kissed him under the ear when he sniffled, trying to calm him down. He was the first person I knew who cut themselves. It just seemed like something that goth kids would do. Something that severely screwed-up people would do. Not Caleb.

“After Vincent?” I asked quietly, hugging him close to me.

He nodded, his head was tucked under my chin. I reached down and felt the scars again. They were in neat rows from a few inches above his knees to right under his groin. As neat and measured as train-tracks down both inner thighs. When my hand stroked back up to his groin, his penis was soft and limp, but I liked to touch it anyway. It was soft and small and plump. I cupped it in my hand and kissed his neck.

“Before…” He whispered. “Before, you asked me if I was scared… If I was scared with Vincent. I was. I was terrified. But…” His voice was thick, he was close to tears. “I… I figured that if he hurt me, or if he killed me, that….”

“That no one would really care.”

He had to force those last words out, and he started to cry.

“Shh…” I whispered. I hugged him tight and curled up into a ball on the cold gritty floor. He was still on the inner curve of my body, he was the little spoon, and he curled up with me. I tried to surround him as he cried, to surround him with my warmth and to protect him. He cried in hard near-silent sobs. Hard little woofs of air that made his body tremble. I tried to curl around him, to contain him. I touched his cheek with one hand, and with the other I cradled his head.

He cried himself to sleep in my arms, and a little while later, I dozed with him. We were finally tired enough, and finally warm enough.

—

I groaned when I woke up. My body felt stiff and sore and aching. My mouth tasted foul, rotten. My head ached.

But he was in my arms. Caleb Greene was in my arms. We were curled up tight, and he was stroking my arm with his fingers.

I groaned softly and shifted. I pressed my lips to the back of his neck. “Hey… Do you know how long we were out?”

He shrugged slightly. “There’s more light now. They should come and get us soon.”

He was right, there was more light coming in through the crack in the ceiling.

I realized that I had morning wood, and it was pressed into the cleft of his ass. I flushed, and moved my hips away. “Sorry.” I whispered. My voice was hoarse, and I had to clear my throat.

“S’okay.” He mumbled.

I got up, flushed even more. “I gotta go. I don’t think I can hold it.”

I moved to the corner of the hut furthest away from where we had been curled up. He sat up, shivering. I did my business, and the splashing on the concrete floor seemed unbearably loud.

I walked back over, blushing and covering my groin with one hand, before moving it away again. We had gone through too much, we had gotten over the modesty phase. I sat down cross-legged so I was facing him. He crossed his legs and covered his groin, before blushing and putting his hands on his knees again. Neither of us knew what to do, how to talk to each other. I just had to try.

“I… What are you doing today?” I asked him.

He looked at me with confusion and apprehension. “What do you mean?” His cock was soft and small. It was so pretty when it was limp, soft and pink and smooth… It was like some kind of fruit. It made my mouth water, but I shoved that thought to the back of my mind. It wasn’t what I was focusing on now.

He was staring at me, and I had this strange feeling, like I was deviating from the script. Like there was a way that I was Supposed to act. I was Supposed to say nothing. I was Supposed to never talk to him again. I was Supposed to go to college and forget all about the sweet lonely boy who had taken my virginity.

It would be so easy.

I clenched my teeth with anger at myself. Fuck the script. The only reason it existed was because that was how I had treated every damn girl who had ever tried to get close to me. Say nothing, reject their advances, forget. Caleb was different. Caleb was Real.

“Because.” It wasn’t part of the script. It was hard to say, and I felt my cheeks flushing. “Because I was wondering if you wanted to see a movie.”

It was the first time I had ever asked anyone on a date. The simple request seemed so normal, and yet so out of place in our situation. I rubbed my cheek with my fingers self-consciously. They must have been beet-red.

He didn’t say anything. His head was tilted slightly, like a beagle. His eyes were wide, and unreadable, he was biting his lips. I kept talking, babbling, feeling like I was sinking.

“Well… I figured that since the circumstances… Since we already hit third base, maybe we should start at the beginning.”

“A date?” He was smiling, and still biting his full pink lip. His smile was incredulous, unbelieving, hopeful. He looked radiant.

I relaxed slightly and grinned. “Yeah, I’ve never been on a date. You might need to help me.”

He wiped one eye with the heel of his hand. “Me neither.” His voice broke slightly, but his smile was now almost big enough to cut his face in two.

My eyes were stinging, too. I was happy and excited and scared, my stomach felt buoyant.

He was looking down, wiping his eyes and grinning like crazy, and when he looked up he leaned forward and kissed me so hard that he missed, planting his lips firmly on my chin. He giggled and re-aimed. I scooped my arms under his and leaned backwards, recoiling slightly when my back hit that damn-cold floor. He was lying on top of me, naked and kissing me with his sweet warm mouth and hot tongue. His cock was right against mine, soft and warm, but getting harder.

The door opened, and I heard Tim’s voice.

“The fuck?”

He sounded more stunned then anything. For a moment I was frozen. I opened my eyes, and Caleb looked petrified. I kissed him on the nose. “Don’t worry.” I whispered.

I stood up, helping him up with me. Tim and Perry and a few of the other guys were standing in the doorway, gawping at us. My cheeks flushed, but I grinned. Maybe it wasn’t smart, but I felt a little bulletproof.

“C’mon Caleb.” I murmured, putting my arm around his shoulders. We were naked for all of them to see. He was cowering slightly behind me, but I made no move to hide. I hugged him close to my side, and I kissed the top of his head. He looked up at me, and he was still petrified, but maybe my crazy confidence was just a little contagious. He stood next to me, glaring defiantly and a little fearfully at Tim.

We walked out of that shed side by side, triumphant Goats. The guys were speechless. Our clothes were still shredded on the ground outside the shred. They were soaking wet. All of them were torn except for my shirt. I picked it up, and wrung it out. It couldn’t have been later then six in the morning, and the sun was just starting to shine.

Tim was talking as I pulled my shirt over Caleb’s head. He was shivering at how cold the shirt was, but he looked grateful as I tugged it snug. The hem fell halfway to his knees.

“You faggots better get back to the tents before anyone wakes up.” His voice was gruff, scripted. He sounded more scared then anything else. I gave him a cold look, and he gave up almost right away, looking at the ground. All of them looked stoned and scared. As if they had finally realized how much trouble they could get in.

I took my own sweet time taking my torn swim-trunks and pulling them on. I held the rip together with my fingers as Caleb and I walked back towards the camp holding hands. We didn’t even look at the fuckers.

—

We went to his tent first. He grabbed some clothes and left. I grabbed some clothes from my tent. We got dressed and dry. It was going to be another five hours or so before everybody was awake and ready to leave the goddamn field.

We were just outside of my tent. It was entirely empty, I had been tent-mates with three of the guys that had kidnapped us. They were probably passed out in one of the other tents. I pulled Caleb into the tent with me. We were both clothed and dry, but I was still cold from the night sleeping nude in the miserable hut.

“Do you want to come in?” I asked, squirming into my sleeping bag.

He was in baggy jeans and my wet t-shirt. I could see his nipples poking through the damp fabric and I felt my erection pressing into my dry clean underwear. He looked around the tent.

“What if they come back?” He asked. He had his glasses back, and if anything it made him look cuter. How had I never seen how sexy he was?

I shrugged. “I don’t care. They can’t hurt us here. And they’re never going to see us again.”

He grinned, and kicked off his sandals. He squirmed into the sleeping bag with me. I reached around him and pulled up the zipper so we fit snugly inside the sleeve of cloth.

His shirt was damp and cold, but inside the sleeping bag it warmed up fast. We snuggled so that we were facing the same direction, only this time, I was the little spoon. It felt kind of nice, even though he was smaller then me. I could feel his erection against the small of my back. He had his face buried in the back of my head. He seemed to be shaking his head slowly, nuzzling into my hair.

His hand was resting on my chest, and I squeezed it gently. I was feeling so tired, I had only slept for a few uncomfortable hours last night. I thought that he was falling asleep.

“Jason?” Apparently not.

“Hm?”

“…Um… Nevermind.” He nuzzled his face into the back of my neck and huddled closer. I could feel him pressed fully against me, all of him. I could feel the hard length of his penis against my ass through our clothes.

I turned around in the sleeping bag. It was dark, but nowhere near as dark as it had been in the hut. I could see his face clearly. He had hung his glasses up on a strap hanging from the inside of the tent, so his pale blue eyes were bare, and beautiful.

There wasn’t a lot of room for arms in this sleeping bag, so moving was awkward. I slid one arm behind his back and I used the other one to cradle his head. He relaxed, using my arm as a pillow. I leaned forward and kissed him very gently on the lips, barely touching him.

He moaned slightly and snuggled closer, pressing deeper into the kiss. His lips were soft and warm. I pulled back slightly.

“What is it?” I asked him. I rubbed his lower back, getting my hand under the damp folds of my shirt to touch his thin warm back.

“Nothing.” He murmured unconvincingly. He shied away slightly, an unconscious denial.

I used my hand on his lower back to pull him tantalizingly close. I could feel his bulge against my bulge, separated by jeans and my boxers. I leaned forward slightly and took his lower lip between my teeth gently.

“Ve haff vays of makingk you talk.” I growled. He giggled, and nipped my upper lip right back. I moaned and rolled onto my back inside the sleeping bag, taking him with me so he was lying on top. Our legs were tangled together and my hands were on his waist and he was cradling my face in his hands as we kissed. His hips were moving in minute grinding motions that made me moan softly with need.

“I’m sorry Jason.” He murmured, kissing my lips. “It’s just…” He shut up again.

I moved my hands up his hard lithe back, gathering the folds of my damp t-shirt. “What is it? I’m not going to get mad now… Just tell me.”

He rested his head in the hollow of my shoulder, and I moved up one hand to cradle the back of his head. His voice was in my ear. “Yesterday… I had a crush on you. The only time I had ever had sex was with a pedophile who had more muscles then brain cells. You were unattainable, above everything.”

He turned his head slightly and kissed my earlobe. “Now… I’m in your sleeping bag. I can feel your cock, I’ve sucked it. You’re even being a gentleman about it. You’re gay, you didn’t side with your friends. We’re going to see a movie later!”

He sighed softly. “It just… It just seems like a dream. It’s like some stupid fantasy that I might have during class, or something. It doesn’t feel real… and I’m afraid that I’m gonna mess it up.”

I didn’t know what to say. I kept cradling the back of his head, and I kissed him on the side of his neck.

“You shouldn’t act like I’m unattainable.” I whispered quietly. “The closest I came to having sex was fondling my homophobe friend during a movie about psychological torture. I know how you feel, because I have to keep reminding myself that this isn’t a dream.”

He wasn’t saying anything.

I sighed. “Caleb? What you and Tim said about me? It’s all true. I hated high school so much that I didn’t try to be happy or make real friends. I didn’t even see anything. High school was just going to be something that I gritted my teeth through. I had college built up in my mind like a sort of utopia, where I would finally get to let go and be myself. I didn’t see you like I should have. If my eyes had been opened, I would have tried to get to know you years ago. If I hadn’t been so blind, if I hadn’t been so fucking concerned about what my ‘friends’ thought.”

“So stop thinking I’m a ‘gentleman’. I’m a scumbag that was too blind and too far in the closet to see what really mattered. I’m just trying to make up for lost time.”

He giggled, and sucked on my neck. I moaned at the sensation of his hot moist mouth, and the way he ground his hips into my hips.

“I just hope this works.” He whispered.

“Me, too.”

“Jason?”

“Hm?”

“Can you take your clothes off? You’re just tormenting me now.”

I laughed delightedly and slipped out of my shirt in a fluid motion, tossing it out of the sleeping bag. “Sure thing Caleb.” I grabbed the hem of his shirt and he helped to squirm out of it.

His chest was warm and smooth against my chest. He ran his fingers across my chest, tangling in my modest patch of dark chest hair. It was just a faint triangle between my nipples that tapered to about the center of my chest. He stroked my chest, admiring it, and slid his hand into my armpit, tangling his fingers in the tuft of dark hair. I squirmed slightly and panted with laughter.

“You’re ticklish?” He asked, puzzled and grinning. “That’s so cute!”

I tried to tickle him back, but he just grinned down at me from his lofty position lying on top of my body. He shook his head. “You can try Jason… It wont work.”

He reached into my armpits and tickled me mercilessly as I squirmed underneath him, laughing breathlessly. I rolled so I was on top of him and I pinned his arms above his head with my hands. He panted and looked up at me, his cheeks hot and flushed with arousal. My groin was pressed tightly against his groin with gravity, and I was rocking my hips so I could grind my erection against his. I could feel his toes curling and his eyes looked dizzy and glassy with lust.

I kissed him hard, breathing through my nose as I tried to devour his mouth. He kissed me right back, sucking on my tongue, and moaning as I reached down and fumbled with his zipper. I kept his wrists above his head in my hand and yanked his pants down a few inches so his cock popped out eagerly. I could feel the hot length of it against my stomach. I jerked down my boxers and straddled his thin hips so my naked cock was against his naked cock.

I grabbed his thin wrists above his head and ground my length against him, kissing him hard as he let out little moans into my mouth, arching his pelvis into mine.

“Jason!” He panted into my ear. “Do you… Do you want to fuck me?”

I was startled, but I groaned as my cock pressed into his stomach let out a blob of precome. I wanted to, badly. But…

“Are you sure?” I panted. “Wont it, y’know, hurt? I’ve never done this before…”

He groaned and bit my earlobe a little sharper then earlier. “I don’t care! Please Jason?” He kissed the side of my neck and reached down, fumbling in his pants pocket. He gave me what felt like a greasy cube and a moist towelette.

I brought the objects to the light and I blushed when I saw what they really were. It was a condom in a foil wrapper and a small travel-size jar of vaseline. The vaseline was half full.

“Why do you have these?” I asked breathlessly.

He nipped my chin. “I’ve kept a condom in my wallet since I was fifteen. I swap it out for a fresh one every time the expiration date gets too close. The vaseline is for my lips. They get chapped.”

I kissed his lips, and they were very soft.

I got on my knees so I had a little room to maneuver inside the sleeping bag. I kissed his lips. “Tell me if I’m hurting you, okay?” He nodded and cradled my head in his hands to kiss me hard. He was almost trembling with excitement.

I set the condom down on his navel, and I unscrewed the slightly slippery jar lid after a few tries. I dipped my middle finger into the jelly and curled it close to my palm to protect it while my other fingers searched for him. I crawled my fingers down the inside of his leg and under is testes until I felt a tiny pucker.

I leaned over him, resting on top of him while I lead my middle finger to his anus. It was so small, but my finger slipped right in. He whimpered, and I froze, but then he panted. “More, please!”

I moved my finger around inside him. He was so hot and slippery in there… When I had spread the gob of jelly around, I slipped in my index finger, and that was more of a squeeze. He groaned and squirmed, trying to make me push my fingers in deep. I panted; he was voracious, he just wanted more.

I took my fingers out and he groaned, but I was just digging in the container for more jelly.

When I shoved my two fingers back in he panted and wrapped his arms around my back, digging his fingers in. The hurt felt kind of good. I squeezed my ring finger into his opening and he gasped, clutching tight to my shoulders.

“Does it hurt?” I panted, withdrawing my fingers. He let out an exasperated laugh.

“Jason? It feels amazing… Please do it again!” He kissed me on the lips and then gasped when I worked my fingers back inside.

I thrust my three fingers in and out, trying to loosen him up. Even though I had worked three fingers in, I was still afraid that it would hurt him. He released me, and I felt his hands caressing my cock, making me lose my concentration.

I heard a tiny ripping noise, and then I realized he was fumbling the condom onto my cock.

“Eager-much?” I joked. He giggled, but he was serious, he lifted his hips and knocked the little jar of vaseline away.

“Please? Jason, I want you to be inside of me.”

“Okay, okay… I don’t want to hurt you.”

“Jason? I have a dildo you know.”

“Whaa?” I jerked so I was sitting up, my condom-wrapped cock standing straight out in front of me about six inches above his stomach. The zipper roared as I sat up, letting in a nice draft to cool our sweaty bodies. He giggled when he looked up at me, but his voice was gentle.

“You don’t have to worry about hurting me Jason… At home, I use that vaseline and a dildo that I bought online.” He blushed a little. “It’s blue… I can show it to you if you want… But don’t worry. I’m not exactly a virgin here.”

I relaxed and knelt back down again. “Sorry Caleb… I keep forgetting. Tell me what to do?”

I didn’t want to offend him, and I really did want some pointers. In all of the porn I watched, there was never any real trouble with anal sex. The stars were probably lubed up before the cameras started rolling. I needed his advice.

He wrapped one hand around the back of my neck for support and with the other he reached down to guide me. “Put some lube on your cock first…” He fumbled with the jar of vaseline and got a big gob on his fingers. I fumbled the jar closed. He slicked the jelly all over the condom over my cock.

“Then, use your hand, and just guide the tip in, nice and slow.” I bent my knees low, his legs were curled over my hips. I led my slick cock under the heavy pouch of his balls. I felt around a little, and I found his slick little hole. I pushed, moaning behind my closed lips at the intense feeling of penetrating that hot slick little ring. He was breathing fast, and he whispered. “Aah!” As his sphincter closed around the head.

My forehead was beaded with sweat… it felt so good.

“Alright, just hold on to me, and come in gently. Keep going back and forth so I can get used to you, and only go deeper a little at a time. I’ll tell you if your going too fast.” Almost as an afterthought, he whispered. “Your cock feels amazing Jason.”

“Thanks.” I chuckled, and then I lay down on top of him, resting my arms on either side of his head. His legs were spread wide and he had hooked his ankles around my knees. I kissed him, sucking on his tongue, he liked that. He kept making these little noises that were mostly air, little noises that incensed me.

I was bumping my hips in nearly invisible movements, each one pushing me a little bit deeper inside him. He was so warm, so slick. My cock slid in about a centimeter and he gasped. buried my face in his neck, gasping and moving my cock in and out a few inches, waiting for him to relax.

Once I had gotten in about three inches, he gasped. “Jason! Jason do that again!”

I went in again, and he shuddered. I knew that I had hit his prostate. I did several short strokes, trying to manipulate his prostate, afraid of going in further. It was him who reached around me and grasped my buttocks, pulling me all the way in.

He gasped with pain and I nearly came. I was in him to the root, I pulled out a little, and went in again. After three strokes, he stopped grimacing, and I started to really move. He clutched my shoulders and moved his hips in time. One hand snaked down to grasp my buttock and squeeze, regulating my rhythm.

I tried to slow down and he moaned with frustration, trying to make me go faster. “Caleb, if I go any faster, I’ll come!”

“I’m so close Jason, go faster!”

I ducked my head against his chest and just gave it my all. I pounded in and out of him as fast as my hips would go and he arched against me, gasping as I punched in and out. I fumbled my hand between us to stroke his cock, but when I touched him, his cock spasmed and I could feel slick fluid coating my fingers and palm.

I gasped as the walls of his ass contracted, squeezing me. I cried out into the sleeping bag as an intense draining orgasm sent my come shooting into the condom.

Four more deep strokes, and then I went limp on top of him, I couldn’t help it. I felt bad because I must have been squishing him, but I needed to catch my breath. The upper flap of the sleeping bag had fallen off and we were just lying there, naked and covered in body-fluids.

I shakily started to push myself off, reaching down to remove the come-filled condom. I tossed the nasty thing over to the trash-bag that one of my tent-mates had started. “Sorry…” I mumbled.

He hugged me so hard that I went limp on top of him again, losing my balance. He nuzzled his face into my neck. “I like it like this…” He murmured sleepily.

I chuckled breathlessly and reached for my shirt. I used it to wipe up the sloppy mess between our stomachs, and to wipe between his legs. After tossing my come- and vaseline- stained shirt into the paper shopping bag I had brought my change of clothes in, I lay back down on top of him.

I held up my weight for a minute. “Are you sure?”

He hugged me tight to him. “Yeah… It feels nice.”

I started to drift off when he started to talk again. “Jason?”

I forced myself awake, and I kissed his earlobe. “Hm?”

“Do you think this will work? You and me?” His voice was so timid, so worried.

I shook my head blearily to wake up. “I don’t know.” I said truthfully. “I’ve never been in a relationship before, so this is going to be my first go.

I wiped my eyes. “But I want it to work, and I’m going to try hard to make it work. And hey…” I kissed my shy classmate on the chin. “Maybe we’ll get lucky.”

He smiled and kissed me back. “Thanks Jason.”

I let my head droop back down to the hollow above his shoulder. “G’night…” I whispered, barely conscious.

“I’m glad that we were the Goats this year.” He whispered, nuzzling into my cheek.

“Me, too.”

THE END