Loading...Waldo was the only child of Edna and Henry. After her husband died from working too hard, Waldo and Edna were alone. Doting mother and loving son, all they had were one another. Reminiscent of the movie Harold and Maude, if Harold was older by forty years, their story, but for the sex at the end between Harold and Maude, would matched Harold and Maude’s story.
My apologies in advance to those Literoticans reading this story while hoping for incestuous sex between mother and son, other than some flashing of his mother by Waldo, there’s no mother and son sex in this story. On a bright note however, there is plenty of sex in this story between our degenerate Waldo and our heroine Susan.
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A big drinker and a chain smoker, Waldo’s father Henry was screwing the president’s wife, Camille, when he suffered a heart attack and died while his cock was still buried inside of her. A win/win scenario for all but for poor Henry, where the men at her husband’s company were trying to make their way up the corporate ladder by having sex with the president’s wife, Camille was trying to embarrass her husband by having sex with all of his top executives. Fucking all of her husband’s top employees, she made sure that she sucked them all too so that when they were in a boring board meeting, they’d be thinking of their cocks in her hand, in her pussy, and in her mouth.
Being that Edna’s husband died while performing the duties of his job, so to speak, the company didn’t want to make their sexual affair public knowledge, even though everyone at the company knew that the president’s wife was a slut, including Camille’s husband. Nonetheless the cover up, Edna blamed the death of her husband on the president’s wife and threatened her, her husband, and her husband’s company with a multimillion dollar lawsuit. Not needing or wanting the bad publicity at a time when they were trying to get investors, the company settled out of court for an undisclosed, large sum of money with Edna.
Waldo and his mother had a loving, mother and son, non-incestuous (sorry) relationship. Edna taught Waldo all she knew about shopping, the activity she loved to do the most. Now, as her husband’s widow, having free access to his fully funded retirement benefits, the money paid to her from her lawsuit, and the large life insurance policy left to her upon her beloved husband’s untimely death, a wealthy woman, Edna had unlimited resources to shop.
“That bastard! He was such a dirty asshole screwing around behind my back. But I fixed him. I got all of his money,” she said having a glass of sherry that she bought two for one at the liquor store, when they discovered that, other than beer, everyone was buying Boone’s Farm Apple wine and California Chardonnay and no one was buying sherry.
It was a beautiful funeral with the best casket that money can buy, on sale, and deeply discounted, when she heard the funeral parlor’s owner, John, had cheated on his wife, Lucille, with their 18-year-old babysitter, Bambi.
“Seriously, unless she’s living in the forest with the other animals, who names their fucking daughter Bambi,” said Lucille to Edna while crying in a tissue, “that is, unless they hope she’d be a stripper instead of going to Harvard to become a doctor?”
With Edna being best friends with Lucille and with both women consoling one another over their husbands’ extra marital affairs, before her husband could stop her, Lucille sold Edna and a few of her close friends complete funeral packages cheap for the cash. With nothing imported from China, Henry was buried six feet under in a beautiful casket made in Maine from hardwood cut and milled from trees in New Hampshire. As it was in death, life was good back then.
Especially now that she was flush with cash, Edna was the ultimate consumer. She not only knew where the best bargains were but also how much not to pay to get them. She could have written the book on bargains, sales, discounts, and coupons. Only, with everything she owned still as good as new, she really didn’t need anything other than some new clothes, a winter coat, a bathing suit, and a couple of pair of shoes, after the cobbler couldn’t fix her old, worn shoes anymore. With her house mortgage paid, having no credit card debt, and no bills, she was a woman who had everything and the money to buy anything but there was nothing else she needed. It seems a shame that all of her shopping ability be wasted on a woman who no longer went shopping.
Instead of writing everything she knew about discount shopping in a book, she passed all of that information on to Waldo. Yes, indeed, Waldo learned a lot from his mother. Only, times were different then than they are now. Merchandise bought today, especially merchandise imported from China, Bangladesh, Sri Lanka, Mexico, Japan, Taiwan, Peru, and Brazil, even premium merchandise, doesn’t last in the way it did in the 50’s and 60’s before the United States sent much of their manufacturing base overseas with fair trade agreements that were fairer for the importer but not so much for the exporter. Even though the United States bought so much overseas goods from foreign countries to sell in Wal-Mart, Target, Costco, and BJ’s, no one wanted to buy our stuff that was made in America. Driven by corrupt unions and burdened with high labor costs, overtime, and benefits, our goods were too damn expensive. Edna bought her furniture in the 50’s, real wood of quality construction, all made here in the United States of America, made to order and built to last, and shipped from North Carolina.
Up until the day she died, she still drove her loaded with options, 1957 Chevy Bel Air, Matador red, fuel injected convertible with an automatic transmission and wide, white wall tires. A very rare automobile, only 39 fuel injected convertibles were made that year in that color and only 5 cars had an automatic transmission. Deemed the baby Cadillac, after loading the car up with options, as this car was, the out the door price was only $550 less than a fully optioned Cadillac. Albeit a bit Spartan when compared to the cars made now, boy that car was the cat’s meow when it was new back then. Granted the car had no seatbelts, safety glass, radial tires, and anti-lock brakes but, the size of a Checker Marathon yellow cab, four average sized adults or five children could comfortably sit in that backseat.
They don’t make cars like that anymore and she’s been offered 25 times what she paid for the car when new. She loved that car and, with no pollution controls and electronics to go wrong, Waldo couldn’t remember when that car was ever in the shop, other than to change the oil, tune up the car, clean the fuel injectors, fix the brakes, and put on new tires. It even got decent gas mileage too. It’s funny how a new car now cost ten to twenty times more than they did back then and last half as long.
Edna, an educated consumer and a real value shopper, still had everything she bought from Sears when she was first married. She still had all of her Kenmore appliances, her stove, refrigerator, washing machine, dryer, and dishwasher. All of her appliances were 40 years old and, other than calling the repair man out to the house every ten or fifteen years, everything worked just fine. His mother loved Sears because Sears stood behind what they sold. Whatever she bought, if that product didn’t live up to what it was supposed to do, bring it right back and they’d give her a new one. With that kind of guarantee, his mother never understood why on Earth Sears would have any financial difficulty but they did, when Wal-Mart built a store next door in the same mall and in every mall where there was a Sears. With made in China cheaper versus made in America more expensive, eventually Sears had to cave to carry the same shit that Wal-Mart was selling. Go figure.
His mother was a hoarder too. Other than collecting junk, she collected gold and silver when most people weren’t collecting gold and silver. When silver traded at 53 cents an ounce and gold traded at $35 an ounce, he never understood her attraction to gold and silver in the way he does now with silver selling at nearly $32 an ounce and gold selling at nearly $1,700 an ounce. Now, he’s glad she hoarded those valuable metals.
She had buckets of silver coins, dimes, quarters, half dollars, and silver dollars, throughout the house. Do the math, if she had 100 ounces of silver and she had so much more than that, what she paid for all of those silver coins was dwarfed by the value of their silver content. One hundred ounces of silver in today’s market was worth $3,200 and she probably had a hundred pounds in silver coins worth about $50,000. Further, more than their silver content and worth a premium price, many of the coins looked new even though most of them were more than fifty years old.
Her chest of drawers and dressing bureau contained stashes of gold jewelry in every drawer. Before others realized the value that gold would have, she bought gold rings, gold chains, and gold earrings and most of what she bought was 18k gold. Going around to yard sales and flea markets, she bought used jewelry, most of which was broken, merely for the gold content. Only, collecting it, she never sold any of it. Easily, she had more than ten pounds of gold or at least, 160 ounces worth nearly $1,700 an ounce that was worth more than $250,000.
Unlike most people today who put all their eggs in one unstable mutual fund basket that are administered by their employers in their 401k’s, Edna owned stock in AT & T when their stock was worth buying and worth enough that she could clip coupons and live a good life on the dividends. Now encumbered with excessive fees, today brokers charge a fee every time they buy and sell an addition or deletion to a 401k account. The investor has no control over what and/or when the broker buys and sells. Yet, always there’s a fee attached to each transaction. Even in the times of a serious economic downturn, under the guise that they’re making your money work for you, the only one making any money are the brokers. When employers told their employees that their 401K’s were protected investments for their retirement, they were nothing more than windfalls of income for brokerage houses.
When his mother died, Edna left Waldo everything. Having cashed in her all of her precious AT & T stocks long ago, after they split, split, and split again when AT & T was breaking up Ma Bell in favor of Verizon, she bought gold and silver certificates. All of her money from her lawsuit and the life insurance from her husband’s death, the house that she bought with her husband when they were married in 1947, her beloved 1957 Chevy Bel, fuel injected Air convertible, her furniture, her Kenmore appliances, and her cashes of gold and silver was his to do whatever he decided to do with them. Even in today’s depressed economy, especially in today’s depressed economy, Waldo was a very rich man. Easily, he was worth more than a few million dollars, a lot of money for a man, much like his mother, who lived a simple life and who really didn’t need to buy anything.
Having lived his life with his mother and with his mother having nothing good to say about her cheating husband and/or the women of today who lacked morals, principles, and scruples, Waldo learned from his mother not to trust anyone, especially any other woman but his mother. With her as his only tutor and constant and only companion, it was painfully obvious that Waldo would never take a wife, not even have a girlfriend. He spent his time masturbating in his room, in the bathroom, or out in the garage. Masturbation was his release and his only pleasure. Poor Waldo.
Being that his mother was the only woman he knew, he enjoyed exposing himself to her. His flashing started when he invited his mother in the bathroom to wash his back while he bathe. Willing to do anything and everything for her son, Edna took great joy and significant motherly pleasure in helping to wash her grown man of a boy. For her, as if she was a nurse, there was nothing sexual in bathing her adult son. A kind and caring motherly duty that was relaxing for her unfortunately was sexually exciting for her son.
Accustomed to bathing her husband, after her husband died, as if she was a Japanese mother, she took it upon herself to help wash her son. For Waldo however with his mother washing his naked body, he was a perverted a son with a different agenda in mind. He enjoyed standing naked in the tub before his bath and after his bath while proudly displaying his erect cock to his mother. Even staring at his cock as it grew to an erection and touching it with motherly affection, always she’d stare at her son with love. Waldo the dirty boy that he was always accidentally on purpose always dropped the soap in the soapy water. With his mother fishing around for the soap, a game he enjoyed playing with his mom’s hand, he especially enjoyed feeling his mother’s hand on his cock when she went searching for the soap.
With no other naked women available for him to see, when he wasn’t flashing his mother, he was always trying to catch his mother naked. Being that they only had the one bathroom, he took his time in the bathtub so that his mother would be forced to use the toilet in front of him. More than once he saw her pubic hair and her naked ass. More than once, he returned the favor when his mother was in the bath and on the pretense that he needed to use the toilet, he flashed his cock to her while peeing. With his mother not thinking anything about holding a conversation with her son while sitting in the tub, Waldo stared at his mother’s breasts and even offered to wash her back. Only, unlike her son, she never dropped the soap for him to find it but he always did and routinely felt a lot more than errant soap. No matter the sexy, incestuous games that mother and son played, always looking out for her son, Edna never stopped in her instruction of him.
“Never trust a woman except for your mother. They’re all no good. They’re only out for your money Waldo. Don’t trust any of them, especially the ones that have a tramp stamp on their behinds, implants in their breasts, and bleach in their hair. They’re nothing but sluts,” she said waving her hand of disapproval.
“Surely mother, there are some women out there who wouldn’t want me only for my money. Surely, there’s a woman out there who’d want me for me,” he said hopeful that he’d find someone who’d want him.
“You for you?” She laughed. Even thought he was now sixty-years-old and on the other side of his life, she laughed her annoying little laugh whenever he tried to assert himself to show her that he was a man instead of her little boy. “Look at yourself in the mirror Waldo. Go ahead. Take a good, long, hard look.”
Waldo looked at himself in the mirror. A throwback to his great, grandfather Horace, with a bad comb over, crocked and yellowed teeth, and hair growing out of his moles, Waldo wasn’t a very good looking man. The only thing that made him attractive to woman, besides the fact that he had a big cock and was still able to use it, was his money that his mother left him.
“Okay mother, what am I learning from looking at myself in the mirror?” He tucked in his shirt over his pot belly while looking at himself.
“You’re the poster boy of, if it sounds too good to be true, then it simply isn’t she said.”
“What do you mean mother?” He looked at her with confusion.
“If a good looking woman wants to date you, marry you, and have your baby, then you’ll know that she only wants you for your money. No beautiful woman in her right mind, but for your loving mother, would want someone who looks like you,” she said giving her son a hug and a peck on the lips. “I’m sorry Waldo but that’s true. When I die, unfortunately, you’ll be alone,” she said stroking his cheek with a loving, motherly hand.
“Thank you mother, I think.”
“You’re lucky Waldo. Where most men never see a gold digger coming, your face is your barometer. If ever a tall, good looking, blue-eyed, blonde with big tits comes your way, you’ll know that she only wants your money.”
“I see but, after you gone, what if I get lonely? Surely, after you die, God forbid, I’d like to have a girlfriend, a wife, and children. Actually, being that I’m 60-years-old, by the time I found someone, married her, and had a child, I’d be 80-years-old when they graduated from high school. Moreover, I’d have a better chance of finding a woman my age than one of a childbearing age. I think my days of wanting children are over,” he said sadly.
“Whatever it is you’re mumbling about Waldo,” said his hard of hearing mother, “best you stay with your own kind. Just as in the movie, Marty with Ernest Borgnine, find a plain Jane, younger woman and from that union, perhaps you’ll have good looking children, throwbacks to a distant ancestor, instead of bearing children who look like you and the plain Jane woman you find to marry you for you and for love and not for your money. Even if your children turn out to be as homely as you, thanks to my thriftiness and hoarding, at least they’ll have plenty of money,” she said patting him on his shoulder.
“I may be too old for children mother,” he said.
“Nonsense, to propagate the Earth, children are the only reason why you’re here. Find a woman still young enough to give you a child,” she said with a motherly smile.
After having taken a lifetime of commonsense lessons from his mother, now that she was gone, dead, and buried, he was devastated. Grieving the loss of his 80-year-old mother, he had no idea what to do without her telling him what to do every minute of the day. Who was to cook for him? Who was to clean for him? Who was going to do his laundry. With his mother doing everything for him but wiping his ass, even bathing him, he had no idea how to take care of himself. Woe is Waldo. Poor Waldo.
With his mother deceased, now that he was all alone, he decided to hire a woman but first things first. Remembering what his mother said about not trusting anyone, especially women, he needed to remove anything of value from his house should the woman be a thief. Hiring his neighbor to help him load his silver in the back seat of the Chevy, he packed up all of Mom’s jewelry and had his neighbor drive him to the merchant of vengeance, Slimy Saul’s Pawn Shop. Waldo didn’t drive, didn’t even have a driver’s license. With his mother driving him everywhere, he never had the need for a license. Instead, he paid his neighbor three hundred dollars to drive his car and help him load it with the buckets of silver and unload it once at Slimy Saul’s.
After haggling a bit, he convinced Saul to take all the gold and all the silver off his hands for $300,000. Even though Saul made out like the thief that he is, a win/win for both, rid of buckets of coins and broken gold jewelry, Waldo had cash and Saul made a pretty profit peddling all of the gold and silver. Alas, the only thing missing in his life was a woman, a female replacement for his kind, loving, thrifty, and trustworthy mother. Only, other than bars, pickup joints, online dating sites, and strip clubs, where would he find such a woman? He put an ad in Craigslist for a cleaning woman who could cook and do laundry.
“Plain Jane, thirty-something cleaning woman of child bearing age wanted. Appearance is not as important as the ability to cook, clean, and do laundry. Being that I like to eat, cooking is more important than cleaning and/or doing laundry. Bleached blondes with breast implants and tramp stamps need not apply. Also, not limited to dating and sex but more to marriage and giving me a baby, I’m looking for a potential romantic encounter to develop as well.”
Within hours, Waldo had a dozen responses from lonely, plain appearing women. Within the day, he had a hundred responses from lonely, plain appearing women. By the end of the week he was inundated by e-mails with pictures most of them fully clothed and some topless, even naked, Waldo had hundreds of responses to his ad from available women willing to clean, cook, do his laundry and even give him a baby.
Looking at all of them as prospective love interests, eliminating those who didn’t send him a picture, he slowly read their e-mails while masturbating over their photos. The ones who aroused him the most were the ones that he picked to meet. He met with a dozen unattractive women who fit the bill. Every women who applied for the job, whether it was homemade cookies, a pie, or a main dish, brought him food to tempt him to hire her.
The last one to answer his add was the one he chose. Forgetting and forsaking all the others who responded to his ad, against his mother’s better judgment and a disappointment to her if she was still alive, he chose a tall, good looking, blue-eyed blonde woman with big tits and a tramp stamp on her lower back. She rocketed her first on the list, when she sent him a topless photo of her big breasts and another photo of her naked, round ass. Her tattoo looked as if it was of a pane of glass beside a no entry sign that read, outgoing only. Puzzled by the sign he asked her what the tattoo meant.
“I do have a few questions to ask you,” he said staring at Susan’s blonde hair?”
“Are you a natural blonde or a bleached blonde.”
“I’m a natural blonde,” she said.
“That’s good,” he said checking his box.
“Do you have breast implants,” he said staring at her big tits along with the huge nickel sized impressions her nipples made in her blouse.
“These 36D’s are all mine and not some plastic surgeons creation,” she said.
“That’s good,” he said checking off another box.
“Now about your tramp stamp, sorry, I mean, tattoo. Being that you sent me a photo of your naked, round ass, I couldn’t help but notice your tattoo Susan when you were leaning forward. Is that a pane of glass and a no entry sign?”
“Yes,” she said with a smile.
“I couldn’t help but wonder, what does the tattoo mean?”
She looked at him and smiled again.
“It means that I don’t do anal and I don’t do windows,” said Susan.
“Perfect. Two out of three isn’t bad, natural blonde, check, no breast implants, check, check, and you don’t do anal or windows, check, check, check,” he said. I don’t do anal either, but I’ll do the windows,” said Waldo with a smile. “You’re hired.”
Susan cooked well enough to please Waldo, marginally cleaned, and took most of his laundry to the dry cleaners. Being that she knew he had money and being that his clothes were so old and raggedly, she used his money to buy him and her new clothes. Their first trip together was to the mall.
“Here, you drive,” said Waldo handing her the keys to his mother’s car.
“Try this on for size Wally,” she said taking him to a men’s clothing store for clothes and standing there with him in the men’s dressing room while he changed.
“Waldo. My name is Waldo.”
“I know but Waldo sounds like a name that I need to find your picture in a book or add the words The Great before it. Wally sounds hip, cool, and young,” she said with a smile that melted his heart and hardened his cock.
She was so beautiful. She was so blonde. She was so busty. She was so sexy. Where his mother, Edna, left off, albeit for the sex that he wished he had with his mother, Susan took over, even with the sex, especially with the sex.
“Do you mind?” He pointed to the door when Susan barged in on him just as he removed his pants. “May I have a bit of privacy to try on these pants?”
“What are you shy?” She laughed. “At your age, I’d figured you’d love to have a hot, young woman ogle you in your underwear, which reminds me, you need new underwear. Those underpants look more like women’s bloomers than they do men’s briefs. There’s nothing brief about those,” she said with a laugh. “Now try those pants on so that I can see how they fit,” she said watching him trying on the pants.
“Gees, Wally, you dirty, old man. I didn’t think you had it in you. You have an erection,” she said laughing while staring at the impression his cock made in his underwear.
“Oh, I do,” he said looking down at the big, stiff bulge his big cock made in his baggy underwear.
“Did I do that to you? And you have such a big cock too,” she said brushing back her blonde hair with a laugh.
“Sorry,” he said covering his erection with his hand.
“Don’t be embarrassed Wally. And never be sorry for something as big as that. Be proud, stand tall, and never be afraid to show and share that monster. Only, being that you look a bit like Jack Lemon, I never would have suspected you for having a big cock. Too bad you never married or fooled around, you could have made a lot of woman very happy,” she said smiling.
“Mother disapproved of every woman I was interested in dating,” he said.
“I figured as much,” she said. “By the looks of you, I bet you’re a virgin too,” she said.
“I am,” he said, “and I’m not ashamed of having saved myself for the right woman.”
“Had you saved yourself any longer and you’d be pushing up daisies with that big boner Wally.”
“Mother must be rolling over in her grave if she can hear you talk like that,” he said.
“Your mother is dead Wally,” she said giving in a long look while reading him. “And by the looks of you, I bet you’re a pervert too.”
He gave her a look that told her he was.
“Must you report my entire personal life in this dressing room? It’s embarrassing,” he said in a whisper. “Someone may hear.”
“Get over it Wally. You’re too old to care about stuff like embarrasses you. After being homeless and out on the streets, nothing embarrasses me anymore,” she said with a laugh. “The pants look good. How do they fit in the crotch?” She grabbed a whole handful of him.
“Hey! Watch it,” he said recoiling from the touch of her hand.
“What? Has no woman ever felt your package before?”
“No. Just my mother?”
“You’re mother? Eww.”
“It wasn’t like that. It wasn’t anything sexual, I can assure you. She used to bathe me.”
“When you were a little boy?”
“No, up until she died a few months ago.”
“Eww,” said Susan. “And did you bathe your mother too?”
“I washed her back. Yes.”
“And you don’t think that was sexual?”
“No, not at all. It was more of a loving mother and son sponging, if you will.”
“If I will? No I won’t if you were my son,” she said with a laugh. “Let me ask you this, Wally.”
“What?”
“After your mother bathe you and ogled your cock and after you bathe your mother and ogled her tits, how many times did you drop the soap in the tub? How many times did she retrieve the soap from in between your legs? And how many times did you return the favor and retrieve the soap from in between her legs while she stroked you and sucked your cock as you played with her titties and fingered her nipples.”
“We did no such thing. I can assure you bath time was nothing like that Susan. How dare you accuse my mother of being an incestuous slut.”
“Okay, okay Wally. Calm down. Answer me this then. How many times did you masturbate while thinking of your mother touching you, stroking you, and sucking you while you fondled her tits?”
“Okay, maybe it was a little sexual on my part,” he said turning red and looking uncomfortable with the conversation.
“My, my, Wally, you have a lot to learn. It’s a good thing you hired me for the job because I can teach you. I’m one Hell of a good teacher,” she said with a laugh. “Being that those pants fit you so well, I suggest you buy one in each color, black, brown, and blue. You’re going to need shirts, sweaters, and shoes too, not to mention new underwear and socks. Susan doesn’t darn socks,” she said referring to herself in the third person while laughing.
“Yeah, well, that’s not tattooed on your ass that you don’t darn socks,” he said with a laugh.
“Look at you. A real comedian. Was that your attempt at making a joke? You actually made a joke Wally. Good for you. We’ll have to work on your humor,” she said looking at her tattooed ass in the mirror. “I don’t have to tattoo my ass with everything I do or don’t do Wally. Suffice to say that I’ve done and will do most things that most other women won’t,” she said with a wink and a sexy smile.
Since Susan allowed Wally in the dressing room to help her try on clothes too, intent on seeing her in her underwear, he bought her whatever she wanted to show him, so long as he could watch her changing.
“How do you like this top?” She turned from side to the other side while looking at herself in the mirror.
“Try on the blue one again,” he said watching her remove the green top to try on the blue top.
“Both tops are the same Wally but for color,” she said with a laugh. “You just want to see me in bra again, didn’t you, you dirty, old man.”
“Yes,” he said fingering his cock through his pants.
“Don’t do that Wally,” she said slapping his hand away. “I’ll do that for you later when we get home.”
He looked at her stunned. She’ll do what for me? Masturbate me? Then he remembered that she didn’t have that she doesn’t give hand jobs to older men tattooed on her ass either. Oh, boy, he has a wild one here, a real winner. If only his mother could have met Susan, surely, she would have changed her opinion about not trusting anyone, especially women. She’s been so good to him helping him to buy things and spend his money. He’d trust Susan with anything and everything, even his money.
“Wait here one second Susan. I’ll be right back,” he said returning with a handful of bras in different sizes. “I didn’t know your size so I brought one in each size.”
Susan quickly looked through the bras to find her size.
“This is my size, 36D and my favorite color, blue,” she said with a smile.
“Try it on,” he said.
“I will if you’ll wipe the drool from your mouth,” she said.
Unabashedly, she removed her top and reached around behind her to unhook her bra and removed her bra while facing him while Wally wiped the drool from his mouth.
“Wow, you have big tits. May I touch them and feel them?”
“No,” she said covering her breasts in the way that Jamie Curtis covered her big tits to the leering eyes of Dan Aykroyd in Trading Places, “you can’t touch my breasts,” she said with a slowly emerging smile. “Not now anyway but maybe later.”
He watched her model her bra. He left and quickly returned with 36D bras in every style and color.
“Try these on too. Better you should try them on here,” he said, “to make sure they all fit instead of buying them and having to return them.”
Susan obliged him. Removing one bra to try on another, she continuously flashed him her bare, big tits.
“Are you buying me all of these bras Wally?”
“Yes,” he said. “I’ll be right back,” he said returning with a dozen panties in every color and size. “Again, I didn’t know your size. Try these on too.”
“Unfortunately, they don’t allow me to try on panties. It’s a sanitary thing. You just wanted to see my naked ass and pussy, didn’t you, you dirty, old man.”
“Yes,” he said drooling again.
“Maybe later, I’ll give you a free lingerie show of all the sexy underwear you bought me,” she said. “Bring me more in different colors in this size,” she said.
“Okay,” he said and returned with panties in her size in every style and color.
With her being so honest, open, and sexy, truly, she was a Godsend. Suddenly looking pensive, he wondered if she was of child bearing age.
“How old are you? He asked blurting out his question.
“How old are you?” She looked at him.
“I’m sixty,” he said as if proud that he managed to live that long, a few years longer than his father had.
“Hmm, you’re twenty years older than. I’ve never been interested in a man so much older than me,” said Susan as if talking to herself.
“How old are you?” He asked again while staring at her as if trying to guess her age.
“How old am I?” She laughed. “You’re not supposed to ask a woman her age,” she said looking at him with a sexy smile. “How old do you think I am?”
“I haven’t a clue.”
“C’mon, how old do I look?”
“I don’t know. I’m not good at guessing women’s ages or weights. Except for my mother, I haven’t had much experience with women,” he said appearing uncomfortable with the conversation.
“Guess,” she said.
“Well, judging by your unwrinkled face and how high up your breasts are, Mom’s breasts sagged terrible, you’re probably younger than I’d guess. I don’t know, thirty-three maybe?”
“Thank you,” she said. “I turned forty on July 26th and I’ll be expecting a nice gift from you Wally, that is, if I’m still working for you.”
“Do you have any children?”
“Me? No. It’s a long story. I’m divorced.”
“Can you still have kids?”
“What the Hell kind of question is that Wally?” She laughed. “Do you want to make me pregnant? Do you want me to have your baby?”
“No, I, um, I was just wondering is all, um, maybe, yeah actually.”
“Being that I still get my period, yeah, I can still have children,” she said looking at him as if he were potential husband material.”
They loaded up the car with all their packages and drove out of the mall parking lot.
“I never spent so much money in one outing,” he said.
“Seriously? You only spent a few hundred dollars,” she said with a laugh. Suddenly Susan took a quick, hard, right hand turn into the parking lot of a Cadillac dealership.
“Why are you stopping here? Do you need to use the restroom?”
“No, silly, I need to buy you a new car,” she said as they pulled into a new car dealership. “Long past its prime, this thing rides like a land yacht.”
“A new car? My Mom’s ’57 Chevy is a classic.”
“Precisely my point,” said Susan. “Now is the time to unload this antique dinosaur.”
“Wait. Hold on. Being that this car is fifty-five years old, nearly as old as I am, I agree that I need a new car Susan but this is a Cadillac dealership. Look, there’s a Chevy dealership across the street. Maybe we should buy a new Chevy instead of a new Caddy. I’m sure if I bought another Chevy they’d give me a better trade-in deal on this car.”
“Trade-in? Nonsense. You could sell this car at auction for six figures. Trust me. Leave it to me to get you the best deal,” she said.
She strode in ahead of him as if she owned the place.
“May I help you?” The salesman immediately approached them. Being that Cadillac’s average customer is a white male in his sixties, the salesman talked to Waldo instead of her.
“Look at me,” she said. “I’m the one buying the car, not him. Actually,” she said with a big smile while hanging onto Wally’s arm, “he’s buying the car for me.”
“Certainly madam. I’m Rick,” he said extending his hand, “the sales manager and you are?”
“Susan, the woman you need to make happy,” she said.
“How may I help you?”
“I want a new Cadillac but not just any Cadillac. I want a CTS-V coupe.”
“Excellent choice. Except for the Escalade, the CTS-V is our most expensive model. Just let me check my inventory,” he said grabbing a box of index cards. “I have a black on black one on the floor and I may have a white one in stock out by the–”
“No, I want to special order one.”
“I see. With the year end specials, you’d get a better deal buying off the lot than ordering a special order car,” he said.
“No I won’t,” she said. “You salesman say the same sucker line to all the sappy customers. With all the financing fees you must pay to the manufacturer, it’s never cheaper to buy off the lot and you know it. A direct pass through, as if it’s a consignment, it’s always cheaper to order the car from the factory. Moreover, I’ll get exactly what I want.”
“Let’s go to my office,” said Rick. “Have a seat. I’ll be right back with my book.”
“How much is this going to cost me Susan,” said Wally looking a bit nervously pale.
“Nothing. Trust me Wally,” she said putting her hand on the bulge his cock made in his pants. “The car won’t cost you a dime.”
“Okay,” he said suddenly dazed and sexually excited while staring down at her hand.
All he could think about after she grabbed his crotch in the dressing room, after she scolded him for fingering his cock through his pants, and after flashing him her supersized breasts was her giving him a hand job. Definitely, whatever he had to pay for the car, so long as the car was in his name and not in her name, was worth the price to have Susan give him sex. Only, he didn’t drive. He didn’t even have a license. When his mother was alive, there wasn’t any need for him to drive. When his mother was alive, chauffeuring him everywhere and with his mother vouching for him, there was no need for him to even have identification. He wondered if she had a license to drive.
“Do you have a driver’s license Susan?”
“Of course. Everyone does,” she said looking at him. “You don’t have a driver’s license?”
“No.”
“Don’t worry. I’ll teach you how to drive,” she said.
“Okay, shall we get started ordering you a car?” Rick opened his big book of options. “Two door coupe, four door sedan, or wagon?”
“Coupe.”
“Color?”
“Silver Frost Matte,” she said. “Oh, and I want the Recaro seats too.”
“That’s a $4,000 option just for the paint,” he said looking up at her,” and another $3,500 for the Recaro seat option.”
“I know,” she said.
“Susan, four thousand for optional paint and thirty-five hundred dollars for Recaro seats? That’s a bit excessive isn’t it?”
She looked at him and smiled while squeezing his cock through his pants.
“When you’re mother bought the ’57 Chevy, she bought the fuel injected convertible, the best model they had,” she said, “and look what at that car is worth now.”
“You’re right,” said Waldo.
“You have a ’57 Chevy fuel injected convertible?”
“Yes.”
“Are you trading that car?” The salesman’s eyes widened as if he was high on drugs.
“No,” she said with a smile, “I’m more hoping for a swap.”
“A swap? I see. What condition is it in?”
“Pristine, one owner with 20,000 original miles.”
“Wow. Let me get the owner. He may be interested in that car.”
“Mr. Martin to the front. Mr. Martin to the front.”
Mr. Martin walked onto the floor and Rick went over to apprise him of the situation while the two men looked out at the ’57 Chevy convertible prominently parked out front with a half of dozen people surrounding it.
“Hi, I’m Tom Martin,” he said to Susan offering her his hand.
“I’m Susan and that’s Wally,” she said while Tom shook hands with Wally.
“I hear you want to swap your old, used car for a brand new Cadillac,” he said with the smile of a flimflam man about to sell rat poison to a victim as medicine. “Actually, we don’t swap cars here, I would be able to give you a good trade-in value for your car however. How does $20,000 sound off of list price?”
“I’m not interested in trading in the car. If I took that car to auction, knowing the car could easily fetch more than one hundred fifty thousand dollars and more with the rare options that it has, rare Matador paint, automatic transmission, continental kit, vacuum ash tray, and Remington Electric razor,” she said watching the owner’s face light up as if she was Mrs. Santa Claus granting him his Christmas wish. “After all my discounts and rebates, I’d want your best price off on net and not list,” she said with a smile that only a busty, blue-eyed, beautiful blonde can give.
“Well, I think we can do business after all. How does an even swap sound. I give you a new Cadillac,” he said to Susan before turning to his salesman. “Which Cadillac are they ordering.”
“The CTS-V, coupe in silver frost matte with the Recaro seat option,” he said.
Mr. Martin openly cringed.
“With options that’s nearly an $80,000 car,” he said.
“I know and the condition and the rarity of the Chevy, that’s easily a $150,000 car at auction, which is why I expect you to throw in a free all expense paid trip to Bermuda too,” she said.
“I see,” he said turning to look at the Chevy again. “I’ll need my man to take it for a test drive first.”
“Of course,” she said handing him the keys.
“Write them up,” said Mr. Martin reappearing with the keys. “Of course you realize that it will take 8 weeks for your car to be made and delivered. I suggest you not drive the Chevy. Should anything happen to the car, the deal if off,” he said.
“We’ll keep it garaged,” said Susan.
It was after Waldo bought her a new wardrobe of clothes and a new Cadillac, that Susan, no doubt, realized that she had him wrapped around her finger.
“Wally, I can’t cook in this kitchen. Everything is old an outdated,” she said stomping her foot and giving him a pouty look.
“Actually, Susan, these appliances don’t owe me a thing. What do you say we buy all new ones,” he said.
“Can we get new cabinets and countertops too?”
“I don’t see why not,” he said.
“Oh, Waldo, thank you,” she said leaning into to him to give him a kiss on the cheek. Only, he turned his head in time to kiss her lips. She offered no resistance when he parted her lips with his tongue.
“I love you Susan?”
“Love me? How can you love me Wally? You hardly know me,” she said.
“I’d know you better if you moved in with me. Now that Mom is gone, I have the spare bedroom you can use,” he said looking at her with hopeful eyes.
“Can I redecorate?”
“Absolutely. You can paint and paper.”
“I don’t paint and paper Wally,” she said looking at her fingernails.
“I’ll hire someone to paint and paper,” he said.
“And may I buy new furniture too?”
“What’s the sense redecorating if we still have all the old furniture. We’ll go together to pick out new furniture. Okay? I’ll dump all this old junk in the trash?”
“In the trash? Your Mom had good taste in furniture. We could sell all of this old furniture at auction and earn enough to pay for the new furniture,” she said.
“That’s a great idea Susan.”
Once the new furniture was ordered and delivered, they shipped the old furniture off to be auctioned.
“Okay, Wally,” she said giving him another kiss. This time, she reached down and felt his cock through his pants. “I did promise you a hand job, didn’t I?”
“You did,” he said nodding his head yes as if to accentuate his positive answer.
She unbuckled his pants and pulled down his zipper.
“It would be easier if you took off your pants and underwear,” she said.
“Oh, my God,” he said. “No one has ever seen my cock besides my mother,” he said removing his pants and his underwear.
“Your mother? Seriously? I thought you were kidding. Best you not tell anyone about your mother seeing your cock when she bathe you,” she said with a laugh.
“My Mom used to wash my back,” he said unabashedly. “And I used to–”
“Eww. That’s enough,” she said with a laugh while taking his cock in her hand. “You told me that already and it took me a long enough time to remove that image from my brain.”
“Oh, my God, Susan, that feels so good for you to hold my cock.”
Only, unfortunately for Wally but fortunately for Susan, as soon as she started stroking him, he ejaculated.
“Well that was fast Wally,” she said with a laugh. “Next time, if there is to be a next time, you may want to prolong the ejaculation for the sake of feeling more sexual pleasure,” she said.
“I’m sorry Susan. That was my first hand job.”
“Seriously?” She looked at him in disbelief. “You never had a hand job before?”
“Nope.”
“Didn’t you attend your prom or didn’t they have proms in your day when you went to high school?”
“They had proms in the sixties and I did attend my prom in 1969. My Mom fixed me up with her friend’s daughter, a woman from church. The good girls didn’t do things like that back then,” he said.
“Well this good girl did a lot more than to give a hand job on the four proms she was invited to attend,” said Susan with a laugh, “which is why she was deemed such a good girl. So, I’m guessing that you never had your cock sucked.”
“A blowjob? No. Never,” he said.
“Being that you’ve been so good to me, tomorrow, after we come home from picking out paint, wallpaper, buying new appliances, and furniture, I’ll suck your cock. How’s that?”
“You will?” He looked at her in shocked disbelief. “Seriously?”
“Sure why not? I’ve had worse things in my mouth than your cock.”
“May I cum in your mouth?”
“Of course. It wouldn’t be much of a blowjob if you didn’t cum in my mouth.”
“May I feel with your big tits outside of your bra?”
“I’d love for you to feel my big tits, so long as you promise to finger my nipples. I’d like to get something out of this sexual arrangement too, you know.”
“Only, we’ll need to rent a car for the next two months, until we get the Caddy.”
Susan rented a car and they were off to do all of their shopping. It was late when they finally arrived home. Not in the mood to cook, she called for a pizza.”
“What do you like on your pizza?”
“Why?”
“I’m ordering delivery?”
“Delivery?”
“Yes, delivery is when I order food, they bring us food, and you give them money to pay for the food,” she said laughing.
“Mom always cooked. We never ordered delivery. She said it was a waste of money,” he said.
“Well, Wally, I’m not your mother and if you want me to suck your cock, you’ll feed me pizza first,” she said laughing.
“Here’s sixty dollars, is that enough?”
“You’d better give me another twenty, just in case,” she said pocketing the extra money, when the pizza with tip barely came to fifteen dollars.
After the thirty second hand job she gave Wally, he was starting to loosen up a bit. Looking at him sideways, obviously, she couldn’t imagine what he’d be like after she blew him. Figuring that he was a virgin too, playing him for all that he was worth, it was painfully apparent that she was curious how he’d be after she fucked him. Done eating their pizza, Wally looked at her with lust.
“You’re expecting that blowjob now, aren’t you Wally?”
“I sure am. A deal is a deal, after all. I spent a bundle on new appliances and furniture and with supplies, it’s going to cost about $3,000 to paint and paper the entire house,” he said.
“We need to buy new carpeting too, along with a new vacuum too, a Dyson,” she said.
“Okay,” he said willing to agree with anything she asked for at this point.
“Well, get those pants and underwear off while I remove my blouse and bra. I’d be more comfortable sitting her while you stand in front of me,” she said unbuttoning her blouse and reaching around behind her to remove her bra.
“You have such big tits Susan. I can’t wait to touch them and suck them,” he said.
“Well, what are you waiting for?” She stuck out her chest for his horny hands to feel.
Touching them, feeling them, squeezing them, fondling them, caressing them, and sucking them, he was all over her big tits.
“I love your tits Susan,” he said kissing her while she took his cock in her soft, warm hand and started stroking him again.
“Now control yourself Wally. Relax. Think of something else. You don’t want to cum too soon.”
“Okay,” he said.
Only, as soon as she took him in her mouth and as soon as she swirled her tongue around his erect cock while stroking him, he put a heavy hand to the back of her blonde, pretty head and exploded all that he had in her mouth.
“Gees, Wally, that was the fastest blowjob I ever gave in my life and I’ve given lots of men, lots of blowjobs,” she said.
“Sorry Susan. I just never felt such sexual pleasure in my entire life,” he said still oozing cum.
“You’re dripping,” she said taking him in her mouth again to lick him clean.
“Tomorrow, after we shop for carpeting, I’ll allow you make love to me. Okay?”
“That’s more than okay Susan. I’ve always wondered what it would feel like to have my cock in a cunt,” he said.
“Women prefer the word pussy to cunt Wally.”
“Sorry Susan. I can’t wait to fuck your pussy.”
“Unless you’re wild with sexual lust for one another, women prefer the term making love instead of fucking.”
“Got it. Sorry Susan.”
“Stop saying sorry Susan. There’s no need to keep apologizing.”
“Sorry, I mean, I’m not sorry. Sorry, you know what I mean,” he said.
The next day, after buying carpeting, Susan invited Wally to her bedroom and to her bed.
Lying there naked, as soon as he saw her, his eyes were glued to her naked body.
“Well? Take off your clothes and get on top of me.”
“What about protection? Aren’t you afraid of getting pregnant?”
“Isn’t that what you wrote in your ad? Isn’t that what you wanted, to make a woman pregnant with your baby? Give me a baby Wally. I want to have your baby,” she said.
Wally made love to Susan and to the day, nine months later, she delivered a healthy baby boy.
A happy marriage, Wally lived another twenty years in wedded bliss. Being that Susan was now sixty-years-old, she wanted someone more age appropriate than her deceased husband who was twenty years older than she was. On the day he died, after mourning her dear, departed, beloved husband in a few moments of silence, lonely, sexually frustrated, and horny before turning on the Red Sox baseball game, she put an ad on Craigslist.
“Lonely widow with lots of dough looking for a young, hot stud with a big cock for sexy good times. Only long lickers need apply. Call for an audition of your oral talent.”
After receiving nearly a thousand e-mails from perspective suitors, with numerous auditions scheduled daily for the next several months, Susan has yet to chose the perfect man but she’s having fun looking.
THE END