At 28 years old I hadn’t been with a man for three years. The first two years after my husband died, I couldn’t bare the thought of another man touching me. I felt like it was cheating. Jake wasn’t supposed to die in that car accident. He was supposed to grow old and gray with me. Jake was gone and I knew I had to move on, but acknowledging this didn’t make things any easier. Still, at twenty-eight I wasn’t willing to spend the rest of my life alone.
This last year, familiar urges returned to my body. I craved a man’s hands holding me, touching me, sliding up and down my body. I wanted to kiss a man passionately and slide my hands all over his body. I wanted a man to rip my clothes off in a “I gotta have you now” kind of way. Most of all I wanted companionship again. I lived in a big house and it seemed so lonely. There was nobody around for me to talk to about my day at work or anything else on my mind. Sure I had friends, but not a best friend with benefits like a husband or boyfriend. It was so hard for me to go to work and hear about my fellow teachers going out with their husbands or boyfriends. They all seemed so happy, and I wanted to be happy like that again.
My best friend and fellow teacher, Beth, encouraged me to explore these feelings. She even tried setting me up on a few blind dates, but none of the men appealed to me. I knew why too.
“You have a thing for John Hanson? But he must be at least twice your age!” squealed Beth, after I told her the reason why the last blind date didn’t work.
“He’s 50 and still damn handsome,” I said more in my defense than John’s.
“I can’t argue with you there, and he doesn’t wear a wedding band so he looks awfully available,” grinned Beth.
John Hanson was also a teacher, a physics teacher to be more exact. He stood about 6’5″, had a lean build from running every day often past my house in the morning. His hair was still mostly black with a sprinkle of gray hair. And his eyes…well they captivated me. They were a deep blue and every time I looked at them, I felt as if I couldn’t pull away. I don’t know how many times I blushed because I continued to make eye contact long after it was appropriate. And his voice was equally captivating. It was somewhat deep, and had a radio DJ’s quality to it.
John’s looks weren’t his only attributes. He was damn smart. I often found myself wondering why he didn’t go on to be a professor, why he bothered to work with often rude high school students? Every time I saw the man in the teacher’s lounge, he was carrying one book or another on various topics. He caught my attention one day (truthfully he caught it every day) when I saw him reading a history book. I am a history teacher and had read the book he was half way through.
“That’s a great book. I picked it up one night and the next thing I knew, the sun was coming up,” I said, laughing at my own joke.
He looked up from the book and smiled at me. Those eyes, they held me and I couldn’t turn away even if I wanted to. “I can’t agree more. I almost wish I could cancel class today. I’d love to sit here and finish it.”
“The other teachers might get jealous if you knock off for the day,” I said, smiling.
“You’re probably right, Jan,” he said breaking eye contact to look at the clock.
That was habit of his, to say the name of the person he was speaking to at the end of a sentence. I loved it. I imagined how he would say my name if he were making love to me, but then quickly tried to clear the thought from my mind.
John closed the book and stood up, “If you have a chance, I’d love to discuss the book with you sometime,” he said while walking toward the door.
“Sure, John I would love to,” I said, smiling at him, wondering if I would scream his name if he were making love to me. I had to clear these thoughts from my mind. I was at work and John hadn’t shown that kind of interest in me.
John nodded his head and smiled at me as he walked out the door to go to his class. I could feel the wetness in my panties as he left. How serious was he about discussing the book? I pictured us sitting comfortably on my living room couch, holding glasses of wine as we talked and laughed, a copy of the book we intended to discuss forgotten on the coffee table. Then I saw him standing up and walking over to turn on my stereo, tuning the radio to a soft jazz station. He walked over to me with his hand extended, “Care to dance?” Setting my wine glass down, I accepted his hand, and found myself pulled close to his tall lean body. It felt so good being so close. Feeling his hot breath warming my neck as he held me with two arms around my waist, my wetness only increasing. Finally, feeling the bulge in his pants grow as he pulled my body even closer to his.
“Jan, what are you thinking about? Must be good because you have a dreamy look on your face.”
Beth startled me. How long had I been standing there daydreaming about John? Thank goodness Beth was the one to discover me and not some other teacher.
I blushed and stuttered “I…I …”
“Let me guess, you were thinking about John,” she smiled.
“How did you know?”
“You just told me and he was on his way out as I was walking in.”
I was blushing and trying to think of anything to excuse my behavior. Beth just laughed at me and pulled me over to the table.
“Come on let’s eat, and you can tell me all about what you were thinking.”
Eat? That’s what I had come to the lounge for, to eat my lunch. John had made me completely forget this.
“Oh it’s nothing, just a silly daydream,” I said trying to change the subject.
“Yeah right, you’re acting goofier than a high school girl thinking about her first crush.”
“Oh please Beth, I am not.”
“Sure, and you aren’t wet right now?”
My returning blush was all the answer Beth needed.
“You’ve got it bad! Why don’t you just ask him out on a date? It’s better than getting up early every morning just to watch him run by your house, and it might stop you from standing in the middle of the teachers’ lounge with a dreamy look on your face. You’re lucky I’m the one who found you.”
“I can’t ask him out. I am more than 20 years younger than him. He might be offended.”
“Yes, some 50 year old man is going to be offended because some 28 year old woman wants to throw her body at him.”
“Tell me it isn’t true.”
Dammit, why was she always right? I would love to be in his arms with my body pressed tight against his. Most of all I wanted him tearing at my clothes, getting them off as quickly as possible.
“See I knew it,” Beth said as she watched my dreamy look return.
“I don’t know. It’s been so long since I’ve been with a man, and all I am managing to do now is act like a school girl.”
“So put on a school girl outfit, go over to his house, and ask him for a date. If he’s any kind of man, the date will begin right then!”
“Beth, stop it!”
“Jan, I can’t stand seeing you like this. You are too young to spend the rest of your life alone. Either you ask him out or I’ll do it for you.”
“You wouldn’t dare. What are you going to do, pass him a note asking ‘Do you want to go out with Jan? Circle yes or no.'”
“If that’s what it takes to get you on a date with a guy who clearly has your attention, then yes.”
I glared at Beth, but said nothing. Ever since I told her I wanted to start dating again, she had been dogging me about it every step of the way. She wasn’t going to let up any time soon. I loved Beth, and appreciated she was so concerned about my happiness, but sometimes she could be so damned annoying about the whole dating issue. I had to ask John out before she did it for me, but how to do it?
* * *
It was because of Beth’s threat that I found myself planting flowers in my long disused garden in the front of my house at 5:30am. I was waiting for John to run by, hoping to “accidentally” catch his attention. I kept looking up, hoping to see his tall figure making its way down the sidewalk. He was so beautiful when he ran. The muscles in his long legs flexing with every step, and his muscular chest thrust forward so his muscles were outlined through the t-shirt. Seeing him run by every morning was such a wonderful way to begin the day.
A smile spread across my face as I saw his figure turn the corner. I quickly bent over pretending to dig a whole for the plant. My clothes had been carefully selected this morning. I didn’t want to look desperate by wearing an outfit that revealed too much, but I didn’t want my body to go unnoticed. I had settled on a pair of tan Capri pants that flattered my rear, and a somewhat tight white top with a push up bra to show off my B cup breasts.
“Jan, good morning. You’ve certainly picked an odd time to do some gardening.”
I turned around and did my best to look surprised to see him. “Oh, good morning John. I didn’t know you ran this early in the morning,” I lied.
“Oh really, who did you think was running by all those morning when you were looking out the window?”
I was horrified. He knew I watched him out my bedroom window every morning, and never said anything? The red seeped into my face, and I began to stutter worse than a school girl around her crush.
John laughed, “Relax Jan, it’s flattering to have a fan like you. An old man like me doesn’t get many looks from young women like you.”
“You’re not old,” I blurted out.
“Thank you, you’re making me feel at least ten years younger. What are you planting?”
“I…um…planting…” What was I planting? I didn’t even know. After work I ran over to a home improvement store and grabbed the first pretty flowers I saw sitting outside. I didn’t even look at the names, and truthfully I had no idea how to plant them.
John walked over, and pulled out the white name marker from one of the flower cartons. “It looks like you’re trying to plant petunias. You’ve never gardened before, have you Jan?”
“No,” I admitted, feeling as if I would never stop blushing. There was no way I could ask him on a date now. I had made too much of a fool of myself. I was beginning to wonder if I shouldn’t switch schools and neighborhoods now.
“I’d be glad to help you. I haven’t gardened in awhile, but I still remember the basics.”
“What about your run? Don’t you want to finish it?”
“I can run any time. Really, Jan, I don’t mind. It’ll be fun to garden again.”
“All right, why not? I know I need the help.” My panties got wet. I couldn’t believe I was going to work along side this sexy man. I couldn’t believe he was still willing to talk to me, and not ask me why I was planting petunias at 5:30am. Something in the back of my mind told me he probably already knew the answer, and the thought made me even wetter.
“Great! First things first. We need to dig up all the weeds before we plant anything.”
John and I worked steadily for an hour. In that time he told me he had lost his wife about seven years ago to cancer. He had dated a little since then, but no one interested him. I told him about how I lost my husband in a car accident, and said I hadn’t found anyone appealing to date either. I felt so comfortable with him. He was so open and honest, and such a gentleman. His rear bumped into mine accidentally when we were turning in opposite directions. It sent a thrill down my spine that ended right in my panties. John seemed embarrassed by what happened. He apologized profusely. I gave him a giant smile and told him it was no big deal. I wanted to tell him he could bump into me any time he liked and for as long as he wanted.
“Wow, look at the time,” I said looking down at my watch.
John looked down at his, “6:30, we need to get ready for work. I really need a shower.”
“Me too,” images of us in the shower together came to mind. Hands and lips everywhere.
John was looking down at the garden, and didn’t notice the dreamy look that had no doubt taken over my face again.
“It looks like we have most of the weeding done. We can plant the flowers later this evening, that is if you don’t mind.”
“No, I would love to finish the garden with you,” I quickly responded, feeling thrilled because we had a date planned, even if it wasn’t officially called a date.
“Great, I’ll be over around 6:45 or so. It will be cooler then.”
“Sounds like a plan,” I responded lamely.
John smiled, stretched his legs a bit, and began jogging away. I watched him until he was out of view, enjoying his rear muscles work under his shorts.
Once in the house I showered quickly, picked out a new outfit to wear. Something flattering, but work appropriate. I wanted to look my best for when I saw John in the teacher’s lounge.
Once at work, the morning dragged by so slowly. During the period before lunch I was antsier than my students to go to lunch. John and my lunch break only overlapped for ten minutes. When the bell rang, I had to control myself so I wasn’t the first one out of the room. My students were probably wondering about my behavior to begin with, and high school students were oh so good at starting rumors. I didn’t need to encourage them.
After every student had left the room, I quickly grabbed my lunch bag from my desk drawer and dashed out of the room. I found John sitting in the teacher’s lounge reading a book about gardening. I wasn’t surprised.
John looked up and smiled warmly. “Hello Jan, I was just giving myself a refresher on gardening.”
I smiled back and chuckled, “Some how I’m not surprised. You must have a book about everything at your house.”
“My wife used to say that too.” John looked almost surprised that statement came out of his mouth. Other than that morning, I had never heard him talk about his wife. As far as I could tell, no other teacher but myself knew what happened.
“John,” I said while walking towards him, “please don’t ever feel hesitant to talk about your wife around me. I know how hard it is to lose a spouse, and it’s nice to know someone else who understands what I’ve been through.”
A look of relief and understanding washed over his face. “Thank you, Jan. That means a lot to hear.”
I smiled back at him and took a seat next to him. “Reading anything interesting in that gardening book?”
“You’ll see,” he said in somewhat mischievous tone. He then looked up at the clock, shut his book, stood up, and walked toward the door.
“I’ll see you this evening, Jan.”
He said this right as Beth walked through the door. Her face lit up with a giant smile, which she promptly tried to cover up by giving John an overly exuberant greeting. John smiled back, looking a bit startled, and then threw me one last smile before he left.
“I can’t believe you have a date with him. You actually did it,” Beth squealed.
“Keep your voice down, I don’t want him to hear. Besides it isn’t actually a date.” I proceeded to tell Beth, in great detail what had happen that morning. She got a good laugh at my expense.
“I can’t believe he knew you were watching him run all this time. I would have buried myself in the garden right then and there if he had said that to me. I don’t care what you want to call it, it looks like a date to me, and I am so happy for you.”
The rest of the day dragged by more slowly than the morning did. It didn’t help that my afternoon classes were taking a test. I couldn’t even distract myself with teaching. Instead I sat behind my desk, attempting to correct papers while trying to push steamy thoughts aside of John and me in bed together.
When I finally got home, I took a shower, found another pair of Capri pants to wear, and put on an even tighter shirt. I was tempted to go braless, but that was just a bit too obvious. Instead I settled for another pushup bra. I tied my shoulder length brown hair up in a pony tail and applied light make up. Looking at myself in the mirror, I decided I looked good enough to eat, or at least I hoped John thought so.
Next, I ran around the house cleaning it up. I also put a bottle of wine in the fridge in hopes that I could entice John to come in and join me on couch. Maybe I would get that dance to soft jazz yet. After all that there was nothing more to do then wait. This whole day had been about waiting. It didn’t help that John had left on such a mischievous note. What was he up to? Another hour before I found out.
About ten minutes before John said he would arrive, I was sure to be outside clearing out any last weeds. Five minutes into the job, John pulled up in his car and hopped out. I gave him a big smile and a warm hello. He was dressed in a pair of shorts, tennis shoes, and t-shirt. The man looked ready to work and very yummy.
“Jan come help me pull all this stuff out of my car.”
“Gardening stuff. Different types of flowers, enriched soil, hoes, all kinds of stuff.”
I walked over to his car and looked in. On his back seat he had an assortment of all different types of flowers. I didn’t know the names of any of them, but they looked beautiful. In his trunk were a couple bags of soil, and other gardening supplies.
“Wow, I can’t believe you brought all these things over. That’s so sweet of you.”
“My pleasure. Besides if we are going to put all this work into your garden, I don’t want you to have only petunias in it. Your garden needs to be as pretty as you are.”
I blushed. This was the first time he openly flirted with me. A glass of wine after gardening was looking more and more possible. The thought excited me quite a bit. I felt a lovely tingly sensation, and wondered if I wouldn’t have to excuse myself to change my panties before the gardening work was through.
“Let’s get started,” John said, while handing me a carton full of pretty pink flowers.
We worked for two hours. When I finally stood up to survey the garden, I was amazed by how beautiful it looked. Even in the dimming light of the evening I knew it looked great. While looking over our work, I began massaging my lower back. All that kneeling down and digging left me a bit stiff in the area.
“Here let me help you with that.” I felt John’s hand on my lower back and his wonderful fingers rub my stiffness away.
“Mmm, that feels so good. Where did you learn to massage so well?”
“My wife was a massage therapist so I picked up a thing or two,” John said.
I wanted to stay standing there for a long time feeling his hands on me, but the mosquitoes had other ideas.
“Would you like to come inside before we get sucked dry out here?”
“Sure, why not?”
John followed behind me as I walked up the steps to my door. I hoped he was looking over my backside as it swayed when I took each step. Anything to make him want me, take me. I was so open to any possibility at the moment. A shower, romp in bed, more massaging, whatever it took to get his hand back on me again.
“Make yourself at home. How does some wine sound?”
“That sounds great,” John said while falling heavily on my couch.
“Don’t fall asleep on me now, ” I laughed as I walked away to get the wine.
“Don’t worry, I wouldn’t do that to you,” he called after me.
I returned with two wine glasses each filled with generous portion of wine. I handed one to John, and sat down next to him, as close as I dared.
“I see your plan now. You’re trying to seduce me by getting me drunk.”
I laughed, “I would never do such a thing.”
John held up his wine glass, “A toast to new beginnings.”
I smiled, feeling more excited by the moment, clinked my glass to his and took a large gulp of wine. It wasn’t the most lady like thing I had done, but I wanted to calm my nerves.
John watched me intently seeming to very much enjoy the view. His stare made me nervous. I wish he would kiss me or grab me, anything at all. In an effort to reduce some of the tension I was feeling, I began rolling my head from side to side. My neck was stiff too from the gardening. I watched John reach his hand over and begin massaging the back of my neck.
“I swear you have magic fingers. They feel so good,” I said closing my eyes and relishing the fact that he was touching me. I felt his body shift and he slid closer to me. Suddenly my wine glass was lifted out of my hand and set on the coffee table. Not wanting to open my eyes, fearing I was just imagining this, I kept them closed and waited. I felt his hand on the side of my face, and finally…his soft lips on mine. I could taste the wine on his lips and my tongue jutted out eagerly to meet his. I pulled myself closer, wrapping my arms around his neck. He wrapped his arms around me, and pulled me on top of him as we continued kissing.
It had been so long since I had done this with a man and it felt so good and so right. His hands stroked up and down my back. I could feel his penis become hard against my stomach. It was such a wonderful feeling. For all the sensations I was experiencing, and all the fantasizing I had done about John, I was reluctant to move quickly. I hadn’t kissed a man this passionately in such a long time, and I forgot how wonderful it was. John seemed to feel the same. His hands glided up and down my back lazily, occasionally pulling me even tighter to his body, pressing his bulge into my stomach and my breasts into his chest. His kisses were delicious. He explored my mouth with his tongue and alternated between sucking on my top and bottom lip. Sometimes he would pull away and kiss along my neck. He swirled his tongue over my skin as he left a trail of kisses up and down both sides of my neck. I don’t know how long we continued on like this, but I eventually did start to feel impatient. I let John know by grinding my pelvis against his bulge. He groaned and suddenly stopped kissing me.
“What’s wrong John?”
“Nothing, nothing at all. I would like for nothing more than to take you up to your bedroom for a bedtime romp.”
“There’s nothing stopping you from doing that.”
John smiled a sad smile and leaned his forehead against mine. “I will eventually, but just not tonight. We’re going a bit fast, and I want us to have sex because we truly want each other not because we haven’t had sex in a long time.”
“You’re a gentleman to a fault,” I said. I had to admit, he was right. Sure I thought he had a sexy body, and I definitely wanted to go upstairs with him right now, but I barely knew him. It wouldn’t hurt me to get to know him a little bit better.
John stood up and attempted to discreetly adjust himself. I stood up to and wrapped my arms around him. Holding him tight, I sought his lips for one last kiss. He returned my kiss with deep passion, and then pulled himself away. I groaned but let go. Walking to the door, we quietly said good night, and I watched him as he drove away.
After all the kissing, I found myself on my bed naked and furiously masturbating. My fingers worked over my folds and then focused on my clitoris. I began tweaking and pulling my nipples. My hips writhed in every which direction, and I could feel my wetness leak between my cheeks. That man would pay for leaving me in such a state and not finishing the job. In my mind I pictured John pulling my shirt off, unclasping my bra and leaning his head down to suck on and nibble my nipples. I pulled my nipples even harder at this thought, moaning lowly to myself. Next, John went after my pants and panties. Once he stripped me naked, he pushed me down on the bed and attacked my folds with his mouth. My fingers slid up and down my folds, imagining his tongue exploring every inch of my nether region. He got to my clitoris, sucked it, licked it, nibbled it. I was so close to an orgasm now. I focused my fingers on my clitoris, moving my hips up and down, feeling my wetness spread over my inner thighs as I worked myself. Finally, John got up on his knees, threw my legs over his shoulders, and plunged into me. That thought alone sent me over. I orgasmed again and again, while shoving my fingers into my opening as a poor substitute to John’s penis. I moaned loudly as I came, and then flopped my arms limply to my sides.
Breathing heavily, I again decided John was not going to leave me in this kind of state again. Next time he really would be a gentleman and take care of me. I felt satiated from my orgasms, but still emotionally empty. I had wanted John so badly this night, and I could only hope he was home in bed furiously masturbating while thinking of me. Eventually I drifted off to sleep, and had dreams about John and I almost having sex, but something taking him away at the last minute. How cruel, even my dreams tortured me.
The next day at work, I found John sitting in the teachers’ lounge during lunch as always. I sat down next to him. He looked just as tired as I did.
“Sleep well?” I quipped.
He looked at me, his deep blue eyes smoldering with lust. I returned his gaze with an equal look of lust in my eyes.
“I could take you right now on this table,” he whispered.
“Damn, don’t say things like that to me. I am barely restraining myself now. How about tonight at my place? I have a kitchen table there.”
“How about tonight we go out for dinner and talk somewhere public. Somewhere where they would take offence to us using their table for anything other than eating. It’ll be my treat. We need to figure out what else we want from this relationship besides sex.”
“Sex is a good start.”
“You know what I mean.”
“Yes,” I sighed, “I do. Pick me up at seven.”
“I’ll be there,” John said as he stood up, adjusted himself, and walked out of the room.
Beth, with her usual good timing, walked in right as he left.
“Woah, did you two have a fight? Nope, I don’t think so. He had a bulge, and your face looks rather lustful. Ah, I get it, he was leaving quickly before you two made use of the table. So am I right?”
I glared at her, but didn’t say anything.
“I knew it. So tell me what happened on your date last night?”
I told Beth everything from John bringing over the flowers, the heavy make out session, and my furious masturbation afterwards.
“Wow, you aren’t kidding, he is a gentleman to a fault. I think he’s right though. You two haven’t been with anyone in such a long time. I can see why he wants to take it a bit slower.”
“Beth, I am going to have sex with him tonight. I know it is important to talk, but we can’t plan out our whole relationship in one conversation. We have let things just kind of happen. Even if we don’t stay together at least we will end each other’s sex drought.”
“Well, I’m not stopping you. Have fun tonight and don’t forget the condoms.”
That evening I took a shower, put on a black knee length skirt and a white blouse, and some black sandals. Lastly, I curled my hair and put on make up a little heavier than usual. It had been awhile since I went out on a date, and I wanted to look good.
At 6:55, my doorbell rang. I open the door and John stepped in, grabbed my hand, and spun me around. He handed me a rose, and leaned over to kiss me passionately. I pulled him toward me, grinding my pelvis into his. Damn, I really wanted this man. I wanted to forget about dinner and drag him up to my bedroom.
“Trying to make me forget about dinner?”
“Is it working?”
“Not in the least bit,” he said while rather obviously adjusting himself.
“Uh huh. My bed is just right up those stairs.”
“And my car and our dinner reservations are right this way,” John said as he hooked his arm around mine and walked me to his car. Like the perfect gentleman he was, he opened the door for me, and then shut it once I was in.
John took me to this small seafood restaurant. It didn’t look like much on the outside, but the food was delicious.
“You really look lovely tonight, Jan.”
“Thanks. You’re looking pretty good yourself,” I said as slipped my foot out of my heel and rubbed up and down his leg.
“Jan, we’re going to talk first.”
I sighed and pulled my foot away.
“Jan, I’m 50 years old. Are you sure you want to start a relationship with some one as old as me.”
“John, your age doesn’t matter to me. If anything, it is appealing to me. You’ve been around, soaked up a lot of wisdom. That’s definitely appealing to me. Besides you keep yourself in excellent shape.”
“You would know,” he said grinning.
I smiled and took a drink. “You’re a lot of fun to watch running by every morning. All those muscles flexing front and back.”
“I’m here to please.”
“We’ll see about that. You left me in quite a state last night. You’ll need to make up for that.”
“I left you in quite a state. What about what you did to me?”
“Yes, yes, I am sure you went home and furiously masturbated.”
“No less than what you did.”
I smiled, but didn’t respond.
“Jan,” John said, his face getting serious again, “we both work at the same school, people will talk.”
“You mean kids will talk. Who cares, let them talk? I just know I am happy and comfortable with you. I don’t feel bad about mentioning my husband around you because I know you understand and know what it feels like to lose someone so close to you.”
“That’s true. I feel comfortable around you too, and you have already made it clear you don’t mind hearing about my wife. Besides you and I put together one fantastic garden.”
“Can’t argue with that,” I said again lifting my foot up to rub up and down his leg.
He smiled, but didn’t say anything this time. Our food arrived and we ate in comfortable silence. After paying the bill, John slipped his arm around my waist and we walked out.
Once at his car, he leaned me against it and kissed me deeply. He thrust his pelvis into mine, letting me know how much he wanted me.
Some kids were walking by and one of them yelled, “Hey you two get a room!” The kids kept walking by laughing. I caught a glimpse of one of the kids’ faces as he walked under a street lamp and realized he was a student of mine. Thankfully, it was too dark for him to recognize me or John.
“I think we should take the kid’s advice,” John whisper into my ear.
“I couldn’t agree more.”
John and I hopped into his car and we were off.
Once inside my house, John was on me. He had my blouse and bra off in short order and left them at the foot of the stairs. I ran up the stairs laughing and pretending to play hard to get. He grabbed hold of me at the top of the stairs, and pulled me tightly to his body for a deep and bruising kiss.
“Mmm…let’s get this off,” I said, while tugging at his shirt.
He stripped off his shirt revealing his lean yet muscular build. I ran my hands up and down his chest and flat muscular stomach admiring the texture under my finger tips.
“You feel so wonderful,” I said, while pulling my body towards his, and feeling my breasts pressed up against his chest.
“So do you,” John said between the renewed kissing. He reached his hands up and began playing with my breasts. He grabbed them wholly in his hands and squeezed, then tweaked my nipples. I loved every bit of it and my moans let him know.
John pulled up from the kiss, “Where’s this bed you were telling me about?”
“Right this way,” I said while taking his hand to guide him in the direction of my bedroom. Once there, John unzipped my skirt and let it fall to the ground. I stepped out of it and then tried to step out of my heels.
“No, leave them on, you look so sexy in them.”
Next, I went for his pants. I unbuckled, unbuttoned, and unzipped them, letting them fall to the ground. John slid them off his ankles as he pulled his shoes and socks off. The bulge of his penis looked magnificent under the cover of his silk black boxers. It was straining against the boxers. On an impulse, I grabbed the band of his boxers and pulled them down releasing his very hard penis. I rubbed my hands up and down, loving the soft texture of it. I hadn’t had a penis in my mouth in such a long time, and I wanted John’s there now. I kneeled down on the floor and licked it. It was already dripping and I sucked up the pre-ejaculate eagerly. Finally, I took it all the way into my mouth and bobbed my head up and down, loving the feel of his penis against my tongue. John moaned, grabbing my hair and using it push my head up and down. Then he stopped me and pulled me up to kiss me.
“I want to taste you too,” he whispered.
I lay down on the bed and he pulled down my panties with a very noticeable wet spot. After carefully pulling my panties over the heels, he quickly made his way to the wetness between my legs. His tongue felt wonderful. I let out long moans, and moved my hips up and down. He licked up one side of my folds and then the other. Finally, he reached my clitoris, and my hips shot straight upward. He grabbed hold of my hips and pushed me down so he could keep licking and sucking my clitoris.
It didn’t take long for me to have my first orgasm. He lapped away as I moaned and rocked my body back in forth from sheer pleasure.
“Please John, please….do me now….I can’t wait any longer.”
“Where are the condoms?” he whispered. “In the drawer next to the bed.”
John jerked open the door and grabbed a silver packet from the door. He ripped it open and soon the condom was on. He pulled himself up over my body and plunged his penis deep into my vagina. I shrieked in part from pain and in part from pleasure. I was so tight from not having sex in such a long time, but John’s penis quickly stretched me out and I began meeting his thrusts, loving every minute of it.
“Jan, you are so unbelievably tight. I can’t hold off much longer. Oh I am coming…”
I felt a slight disappointment at not feeling his semen gush into me, but I quickly forgot this as John reached down and rubbed my clitoris. I came again at the tail end of his orgasm.
He rolled off me, breathing heavily.
“That was wonderful,” he half mumbled.
“Mmm,” I agreed.
“It was much too short. I am going to have to do you again after a nap, and I may have to do you one more time after that,” John said as he rolled over and pulled my body close to his.
“You can do me as often as you like,” I said as I drifted off to a happy sleep.
I woke up slowly and opened my eyes to see John still sleeping next to me. A smile came over my face as memories of the previous night filled my mind. John had been true to his word and we had sex again in the middle of the night. The second time around was very slow and exploratory. He kissed me everywhere, and used his hands to feel the topography of my body. I did the same, making sure to feel every muscle of his lean body. I explored his neck and chest with my tongue and lips being sure to nibble on his nipples. His penis pressed hard against my inner thigh while we explored and I loved the feeling. It had been so long since I felt a hard penis against me. When he actually penetrated me he did so with slow strokes, letting his penis completely fill me then removing almost all of it. Finally, he flipped me over on all fours and we had sex doggie style. He grabbed my hips and pulled my body toward him as he slammed into my vagina. I reached between my legs rubbing my clitoris, and heard John moan as my vaginal muscles squeezed his penis. Our orgasms came in unison and we both moaned loudly. I collapsed feeling the remnants of my orgasm flow through my body. John collapsed too, but was sure to keep his eyes on me, watching me, smiling at the immense pleasure still very prominent on my face.
After a few minutes he said, “You know, I wanted to ask you out for awhile. I loved how you got up early to watch jog every morning.”
“Why didn’t you?”
“Our age difference, our jobs, my wife.”
“Your age is sexy and one of us can always find a new job. As for your wife, I know what you mean. I didn’t want to see another man after Jake died, but I can’t live the rest of my life single. I hope you don’t regret tonight.”
“No, not even a little bit. You were amazing, and I’ve missed that kind of contact with another human being.”
“Good. I don’t want us to do anything we would regret later. Let’s get some sleep”, I said while leaning over to kiss him lightly on the lips. He smiled and pulled me close. Soon we both drifted off.
I got out of bed quietly and slipped into the bathroom. It was Saturday and I was free to spend the whole day with John. I quickly took a shower and thought about what I had in the house for breakfast. Eggs, toast, and maybe some orange juice. After drying off I threw a robe on and headed downstairs to the kitchen to make breakfast.
I was thinking about serving breakfast in bed, but I heard John get up and take a shower. Hearing him take a shower made me smile. I liked having him around, I liked that he felt comfortable enough to wake up and take a shower in my house. I also like the thought of having him around all the time. Stop thinking that way I told myself. Everything is so new and you are already thinking about him moving in. But the thought was there, firmly planted. Well, it isn’t like he has to move in right away, maybe in a month or so or during summer break. My plotting was interrupted by John coming down the stairs in the black silk boxers I had taken off him the night before and a white t-shirt.
“Good morning. What’s for breakfast?”
“Morning. I’m making eggs and toast.”
“Mmm, sounds good,” John said as we walked out of the kitchen and to the front door. I heard him open the door and then shut it again. He came back to the kitchen with a newspaper in hand. “I’m glad you get the paper on the weekends,” he said while sitting down and opening it.
“How do you know that?”
“You don’t think you were the only one doing the observing when I jog by your house.”
“I guess not,” chuckling as I set the table, and then leaned over to give John a kiss.
I opened the freezer to find the frozen orange juice.
“Damn, I’m all out of orange juice. I really need to go grocery shopping.”
“So do I. How about we go shopping together after breakfast?”
“Sure, and maybe later we could catch a movie,” I said, while hoping I wasn’t coming on too strong.
“I haven’t been to a movie in forever,” he said as he flipped to section of the paper with movie listings.
John and I went grocery shopping, and then to a garden store to find more things for our garden. John humored me and bought a gnome even though I knew he thought they were silly. It was nice spending the day with him just getting to know him. The more time I spent with him, the more I could see spending every day with him. I again pushed that thought out of my mind. It was too soon to think about something like that, but I really like the idea of having a best friend combined with fantastic sex.
We did make it to a movie, but I don’t remember much of it because I had more fun snuggling with John in the theater. Then I started teasing him by rubbing my hand up and down his thigh and finally between his legs. I could feel him getting hard and I gave his penis a squeeze to encourage it. Once I felt it get really hard I began rubbing slowly, then got a little faster. John shifted uncomfortably in his seat, but made no move to stop me. He even opened his legs a little wider, and eventually a look of shear pleasure spread over his face. He closed his eyes and quietly sighed. I glanced around quickly, but there weren’t many people in the movie theater and the few in there were intent on watching the movie. When I turned my attention back to John, his lips were slightly parted and his hands were gripping the arm rests. Suddenly he let out a quiet moan and I felt a wet spot form under my hand. I had to stifle a giggle. I really did have intentions of watching the movie with John, but I just couldn’t keep my hands off him. My body felt awakened by the prospect of new sexual pleasure. I had gone too long without intimate human touch, and now I had this amazing man next to me and I seemed to have lost any will power to resist my recently awakened desires.
John didn’t say anything about the hand job in the theater. He simply guided me so I walked in front of him all the way to the car. Before opening the car door for me he whispered in my ear:
“Don’t worry, I’ll be sure to return the favor.”
“Well, I hope so, ” I responded while giving him a seductive smile.
* * *
That night I asked John if he felt like spending the night again. He suggested I come to his place instead, and he promised to make a tasty spaghetti meal. I could hardly refuse an offer like that, and the thought of hot sex for desert was just too much to resist.
John’s house was not surprisingly filled with books. His bookshelves were full so he had started stacking books every where else. The place was dusty and a bit cluttered looking. It really needed a good cleaning.
“Sorry about the mess. I don’t get many visitors.”
“Uh huh,” I half said to myself while planning on how to clean the place tomorrow. “You’re going to buy some more book shelves tomorrow because I can’t have all these books around while I am trying to clean.”
“I’m not coming over if there isn’t even a place on your couch to sit because you are using your couch as a make shift book shelf.”
I helped John with dinner by preparing a salad and garlic bread. John put out a tablecloth on his table on the deck, lit some candles, and opened a bottle of wine. It was dusk so the candles shown brightly as John pulled out a chair for me to sit down.
“Everything looks so good and tastes even better,” I said as I put the first forkful of spaghetti in my mouth.
“Thank you,” John said while pouring me a glass of wine.
John’s property bordered a park with a stream. It was no doubt beautiful to look at during the day, and at night the frogs and crickets were wonderful to listen to. I leaned back and let out a content sigh trying to remember the last time I had been this happy.
“You seem happy,” John said while giving me a bemused look.
“I am. It’s been such a long time since I have been able to enjoy myself in this way.”
“I know what you mean. For a long time I felt guilty about going out on dates, but it is different with you. I don’t feel like I have to censor my words around you, and you can speak freely around me too.”
“Very true…it just makes everything so comfortable.”
John and I ate the rest of our meal in a content silence. I helped him clear away the dishes. When we were finished he told me to take my wine glass and follow him. John walked out the back door on to the deck and then out to his lawn with a wine glass in one hand and the wine bottle in the other. I hadn’t noticed it before, but there was bench next to the stream. It was just barely illuminated by the light from John’s house.
“Have a seat and help me finish this wine.”
I took a seat while taking a wine glass. John poured me a rather full glass and did the same for himself.
“You don’t have to get me drunk to have sex with me,” I chided John.
“Who said anything about sex?”
“Ha,” I said while sliding closer to snuggle with John.
“See the wine is working already.”
I gave him a playful punch to the arm and then took a big drink of my wine. John wrapped his arm around me and pulled me closer. I lay my head on his shoulder and inhaled deeply. He had such a wonderful scent. It was almost more intoxicating than the wine. I took another drink of my wine and could slowly feel my limbs get tingly as the effects of the alcohol took hold of me. After taking another bigger drink I began nuzzling John’s neck and nipping at his ear lobes.
I simply giggled and took another drink of my wine.
“You know that was a naughty thing you did in the movie theater.”
“Please, you loved it and you’d let me do it again any time,” I retorted and then finished off the rest of my wine. The wine was really taking hold of me. I felt bubbly and a bit naughty. My hand began to slide up and down his inner thigh. John finished off the rest of his wine and then grabbed my wondering hand by the wrist. He took my wine glass out of my other hand and set it down on the grass. He then forced my back to the bench with a passionate kiss. I could only moan, waiting, wanting…needing more of him.
“I can’t have your naughty hands doing all the work,” John whispered heavily in my ear. Still holding on to my wrist he stood up and pulled me up with him and then pulled me in the direction of his house. When we were close enough I could see the sheer lust and determination on his face. I knew the sex was going to be good. I knew it was going to incapacitate me until the next morning. My mind could not help me form words only vivid pictures formed in my mind’s eye of John having his way with me.
Once inside, John pushed me against a wall and began kissing me deeply. His hands ran furiously over my body, massaging my breasts, grabbing my ass, sliding up and down my back. He pinned me to the wall with his tall muscular frame and one leg between my legs. My hands followed suit touching him any where and everywhere. I tugged at his shirt, trying to pull it over his head and still continue to kiss him. John broke his kissing for a moment to quickly remove his shirt and mine. The heat of his bared chest and stomach mixed with his scent were driving me mindless. I was completely at his will and he seemed to know it.
John grabbed me by the wrist again and pulled me in the direction of his stairs. At the foot of the stairs he yanked my bra off, and then kissed me deeply again. The weight of his body against me caused my knees to buckle. John felt this and wrapped his arm around my waist to pull me up right and tight against his body.
“Up to the bedroom with you,” John growled in my ear and then nipped my ear lobe. I followed behind him barely coherent of my surroundings. At the top of the stairs John began kissing me again while undoing the button to my jeans and quickly yanking them off my hips. I slipped off my shoes and then half kicked off and half tripped out of my jeans. I attacked John’s pants and ripped off the button from his khakis. He quickly slipped out of them and then pulled my body close to his so I could feel his erection pressed against me. I tugged his boxers off and wrapped my hand around his penis. Its stiff smoothness felt so good against my hand, and I knew his penis would feel even better buried deep inside me.
“This way to the bedroom,” John said as he yanked off my panties. I quickly found my back against his bed and John’s heavy weight and intoxicating smell consuming my front side. After a quick condom pause, John wasted no time spreading my legs wide and pushing his penis into my more than ready vagina.
“Oh yes…feels so good…so full…”
“Mmm so tight and wet…”
John began pumping hard while kissing my breasts and sucking hard on my nipples. I moaned and screamed. Finally, I wrapped my arms around his neck, pulled him close, and bit his shoulder in ecstasy.
“Ahhh,” John let out a cry of surprise and lust. “So you want to be rough…” He sat upright while still thrusting into me. I wrapped my legs around his waist to steady his strokes. He leaned over and grabbed my breasts and squeezed hard.
“Harder,” I screamed out. John intensified his grip. I was so turned on so filled with adrenalin and lust all physical sensations were pleasurable.
“Bite my nipples.” John leaned down and nipped my nipples. I snaked my hand down between my legs and began rubbing my clitoris furiously. My vaginal muscles responded with intense squeezing around John’s penis.
“I love it when you do that,” John breathed heavily in my ear and intensified his strokes. I felt my orgasm building, spreading outward, and pulsing through my body. My toes curled and my other hand dug deep into John’s back as my head tipped back, and my mouth let out a scream that would leave the neighbors wondering. John followed, arching upright as he came, his moaning filling my ears. I kept rubbing my clitoris and had another smaller orgasm that served to prolong the pleasure of John’s orgasm.
Breathing hard, John half collapsed on to my body. For awhile we lay quietly catching our breath.
“A man could get used to that.”
“You aren’t the only one.”
“I need a shower.”
“We both need a shower.”
John rolled over on his back and hoisted himself upward so he was sitting on the edge of the bed. He chuckled and said, “I think I need to wait for some blood to resituate itself before I stand up.”
I rolled over and sat upright next to him. “We’ve made a mess on your comforter.”
“It was worth it. Besides you’re planning on cleaning tomorrow,” John said with a grin.
“Hush you,” I said standing up and offering him a hand to pull him up. “I think I’ll begin my cleaning with your body.”
“Can’t argue with that.”
John and I took a long hot shower. I washed his hair and soaped up his body. He did the same for me. His hands worked magic massaging out any sore muscles as he soaped me down.
“One of these days I expect a fully body massage from you.”
“I think that can be arranged,” John responded while turning off the water. “You wear me out Jan. I think I’ll have to sleep in tomorrow. That’ll be the second day in a row I miss my jog.”
“That’s okay, your audience will be sleeping in as well.”
Chapter Three I woke up late the next morning to the smell of pancakes. Remembering that I was still naked, I walked over to John’s dresser and pulled out one of his t-shirts, then I wandered into the hallway to find my panties, and finally down the stairs to get my jeans. I am sure my bra and shirt were around somewhere, and I would find them, , ,eventually.
“Good morning. I see you found my t-shirts.”
“Morning, I couldn’t very well clean topless.”
“Hmm, now that sounds like fun to watch.”
“Hush you and serve me some breakfast.”
“Right away madam.”
I was true to my word and spent the whole day cleaning John’s house. His books had collected an incredible amount of dust. I found myself sneezing almost constantly for an hour. I then vacuumed, mopped, and did every other chore Cinderella most likely found on her list of things to clean. John spent most of his day putting together bookshelves, fussing over how his books should be ordered, and bringing me lunch and drinks.
“Much better. It actually looks like a woman has lived here.”
“Jan I haven’t seen the place this clean in awhile. I know where all my books are now too. Amazing.”
I gave John a wry smile, but didn’t say anything.
“It’s amazing how well we work together,” said John. He looked like wanted to say more, but then appeared to think better of it.
“I agree,” I said giving a slight smile. I wanted to comment more on our clearly forming relationship, but didn’t want to sound pushy. Things were moving so quickly. The sex was obviously great, but it wasn’t just the sex alone. We did the garden together, went grocery shopping, cleaned house…we were acting like a couple, and I liked it.
“I have lots of tests to correct so I should probably get going. You and your bed together will distract me,” I said suddenly feeling very awkward.
“I have plenty to correct myself. Let’s plan on dinner together sometime this week.”
“Sure, that sounds great,” I said walking out of the room to find my bra and shirt.
“Don’t worry about changing. You can give me my shirt back later.”
I smiled, walked over to John and gave him a hug and a chaste kiss.
“Bye John, I’ll see you tomorrow at school.”
“Don’t worry, I won’t say anything if you don’t.”
“Deal. Bye Jan,” he said and then gave me one last kiss.
For two people who spent the entire weekend having amazing sex, we left each other on very awkward terms. I think John came to many of the same realizations I was coming to. We worked well together….we could spend more time together…living together, sometime in the future, didn’t seem like such a far fetched idea. But what if I was rushing things? Shouldn’t I wait awhile before I make any decisions about John and my future together? I had been single for three years, and now I was suddenly ready to settle down with the first guy I’ve dated since Jake’s death? All these thoughts were very overwhelming, and I needed someone to talk to, and I knew just the person.
“About damn time you call me! Where have you been all weekend? Did you do it? Was it good? Damn it Jan don’t leave me in the dark about these things for a whole weekend!” said Beth over the receiver.
“Hi Beth…sorry for not getting back to you sooner, but I was …busy,” I said while smiling rather sheepishly. Beth saw my number on her caller ID and didn’t even give me the common courtesy of waiting five minutes or so before asking for all the juicy details. She didn’t even say hello.
“Busy, huh? Well, busy sounds like something I should hear about in graphic detail.”
“No doubt you will ring every little detail out of me. Why don’t you come over? We’ll get Chinese carry out, and correct papers.”
“Forget papers! I’m coming over for a complete report. Order the Chinese now, and I’ll be over in a half hour. Bye Jan.”
Beth hung up before waiting for me to say bye. Beth did love details. She was absolutely addicted to romance novels, but the idea of hearing about a real life romance was far more exciting to her than any romance novel. I didn’t mind telling her all the details. Beth is my best friend and I knew she would keep her mouth shut. Besides I really needed someone to talk to, and I knew Beth wasn’t so wrapped up in the romance of the situation that she wouldn’t be able to give me sound advice.
“Damn, I am going to have an orgasm just listening to you, Jan. I can’t believe you did that to him in the movie theater. I am never going to be able to look at John the same way again,” Beth said while shoving bites of Chinese food in her mouth.
“Don’t say that Beth. John asked me not to kiss and tell. I don’t need you giving him funny looks.”
“Wow! Calm down. I promise not to say a word or give John funny looks…at least not to his face.”
I glared at Beth, but didn’t say anything.
“Relax Jan. You should be happy. I know it was so hard for you after Jake died. Now you have someone who couldn’t be more understanding of your situation. Just go with it. Enjoy his company…and please keep enjoying the sex! I could write a romance novel with all you’ve told me.”
“I guess you’re right. It just amazes me that I can fall hard for someone in such a short period of time. I just thought I would have to do a lot of searching to find someone even comparable to Jake, but it isn’t really about finding someone comparable to Jake. It is about finding someone new and different.”
“True. You’re never going to replace Jake, and that’s a good thing. John sounds like a great guy. He seems very understanding, someone who’s in a relationship for the long haul. Like I said before, just go with it. Even if the sex is great, it sounds like you two have more than just sex going on.”
“I’ve got to start correcting those tests. My students will wonder what I’ve been up to all weekend when they don’t get their tests back tomorrow.”
“Just tell them you were having amazing sex and couldn’t be bothered with their tests.”
“Beth! Never mind, I’m just not going to say anything,” I said while rummaging around in my bag to find the tests and a red pen.
Beth and I did get around to correcting all the homework and tests, but we didn’t finish until eleven at night. We decided to have a few beers and Beth ended up spending the night. After about three beers each things became much funnier than they actually were. I decided with what little sober sense I had left it would be best for us to go to bed.
* * * I woke up the next morning with a nervous feeling in my stomach. I was going to see John again after leaving on somewhat awkward terms. Maybe I could convince him to go out for that dinner so we could feel like a normal couple starting things off. It was silly for us to feel awkward around one another. We had already seen each other naked. And I could definitely stand seeing him naked again.
The nervous feeling in my stomach increased as I made my way to the teacher’s lounge to see John briefly.
“Hello there beautiful,” John said and than gave me a quick kiss on the lips before anyone else walked in.
“Hi there. You’re in a good mood.”
“And why shouldn’t I be. I have a lovely lady standing right next to me whom I intend to have my way with tonight.”
“Shh! I don’t want anyone to hear that.”
“I’m sorry Jan. You’ve just made me very happy, and now I just want to go with the flow so to speak. I don’t know what will develop, but that’s okay.”
“I decided the same thing…” I was cut short as Beth walked into the room.
“We’ll talk more later at dinner,” John said as he walked out of the room.
“Okay sure,” I called after him.
“Hmmm, I love to watch newly developing relationships,” Beth gushed after John walked out of the room.
“Beth, not another word.”
Beth merely gave a Cheshire grin, and sat down at the spot where John had been sitting.
The rest of the day went by smoothly. By chance I passed John in the hall during my prep. Classroom doors were open so we just smiled at each other. Even with doors open, John reached back and grabbed my rear. I had to stifle a squeal. He would pay for that.
Even though I wanted to jump in bed with him the minute John and I were alone, I felt the need to talk first. I didn’t like using condoms all the time, but I liked the idea of having a baby even less. I hadn’t been on birth control in awhile, but maybe it was time for me to consider it again.
John came over to my house around 6pm. He let himself in and walked quietly upstairs to my bedroom. I hadn’t heard him because I had my head stuck in the closet looking for my missing shoe. John snuck up behind me and wrapped his arms around me. I screamed out of fear at first, but was quickly hushed when I heard John’s voice in my ear.
“You shouldn’t leave your door unlocked young lady. You never know who might walk into your house. What if it is a perverted old man with lecherous intentions?”
“Hmm, is that a promise,” I whispered as John began kissing my neck and nibbling my earlobe. He turned me around and we began kissing passionately. I felt his bulge against my stomach, and reminded myself I wanted to talk to him first.
I pulled away. John looked bewildered.
“Is something wrong?”
“No, not at all. I just want to talk to you first.”
“About what?” he asked with a slightly nervous note to his voice.
“Don’t worry. It’s nothing bad. I just wanted to ask you about our methods of protection.”
“You don’t want me to stop using a condom, do you?” John asked with a bit of an incredulous look on his face.
“Well, yes…but in exchange I’ll go on the pill.”
“I like that idea. It will give me an opportunity to just do you anytime I want.”
“Hmm…that sounds dangerously fun,” I said, smiling coyly.
John drew me in and began kissing me on the neck again. Between kisses he began telling me all the places where he wanted to do me.
“How about your desk at school?”
“You wouldn’t dare.”
“And you did invite me to do you on the teacher’s lounge table.”
“That was before I got you in bed.”
“Excuses, excuses. You just make me want to do you in those places even more. Or we could always go back to the movie theater. Maybe in the dark no one notice you riding me.”
“How about you just do me on the bed right now?”
“I think I can handle that.”
John began unbuttoning my sleeveless blouse, and then he went for my bra. He lean down to kiss and suck my nipples. His hands cupped them and squeezed. I loved all his attention, but I wanted his chest bare too. I tugged at his shirt, and quickly he pulled it off for me. Next, I went for his pants and in short order they and his boxers were off. John quickly stripped me of my skirt and panties. For a minute we just held each other feeling our bodies meld into one another. John started kissing me again.
“Let’s go to the bed,” I whispered.
John lifted me up and soon I felt the bed on my backside and his glorious lean body draped over mine with his hard member pressing urgently on my inner thigh. I ran my hands up and down his back as I felt his finger work over my clitoris. Soon I was feeling the first of many small orgasms.
“Turn over onto your back,” I whispered.
Soon John’s hard member was being bathed by my tongue. I began to study his penis. It was long like he was tall. He was circumcised and he had a beautiful ridge running down the underside of his penis. All of these things I took time to explore with my tongue. I ran my tongue over his head in a swirling motion, and then I licked it from tip to bottom. John groaned and ran his hand through my hair. He kept looking down at me as I took his length into my mouth. Eventually I found myself bobbing up and down and using my hands to stroke his balls.
“That’s it babe…feels so good. I am so close,” said John between moans.
By now he was grabbing my hair a little harder and was pushing my head up and down his penis. It had been forever since I had done this and I loved watching the pleasure wash over his face.
“I am going to come,” he groaned. I lifted my head up and began rubbing his penis and stroking his balls. With a groan he came over my hand in white spurts. I watched his face as he came. John had his face tipped back his chest arched up. His eyes were closed and he admitted a low moan.
“That was fantastic.”
“Glad you liked it. Would you mind returning the favor?”
“I think I can handle that.
I found myself on my back with my legs wide open heading for a major orgasm.
That morning I woke up at 6:30am. John was asleep next to me. I nudged him, and then began kissing him and nibbling his earlobes.
“Mmmm, I could get used to that wake up call.”
“C’mon get up. We’re going to be late for work.”
“But we’re just getting to the good part,” complained John.
“Good parts come later…after work.”
“Watch it or I’ll show you how cruel I can be,” I said as I grabbed his balls. “You’re both a cruel and tempting woman. Get me all worked up and now you’re hopping out of bed.”
I stuck my tongue out at him and ran to the shower. I took a very quick shower, and applied my make up just as quick. With a towel wrapped around me I stepped out of the bathroom and right into John’s arms.
“Hello beautiful. What’s with the towel? I’ve never known you to be so modest before,” said John, as he ripped off my towel and began groping my breasts, while kissing me.
“John you’re going to make us late. I don’t want people to talk.”
John sighed and pulled away. “I can’t wait for you to get on birth control. A morning quickie sounds wonderful.”
“I agree,” I said, while smiling rather forlornly.
I dressed while John took a shower. I put on a pair of panties and took them off right away because I hadn’t realized how wet John had gotten me. I had a severe urge to rub my clitoris, but it was getting late. I put on a new pair of panties and slipped on my outfit for the day. John got out of the shower and put on the clothes he wore yesterday.
“I am going to run home and change. I’ll see you at school,” he said, while leaning over to kiss me. “Don’t forget to call the doctor today about the birth control. I’ll take you if you want. “No, that’s okay. I’ll call during my lunch break today. Bye John.”
I wanted to say more to him. Like what? “Love you sweetie, see you tonight.” Love? Was this love? Sex, lust, companionship had all crossed my mind, but never love. In all this time I had never thought about falling in love again. Did John feel the same way? He obviously cared for me. He offered to take me to the doctor’s. He helped me with my impromptu garden, and he didn’t have any problem worshipping and sexing my body into oblivion. But were all these things love? The thoughts disturbed me a little, which seemed silly because falling in love isn’t a bad thing. Still, if I fell in love and even married a 50 year old man, does that mean I would never have children? Did I even want children? Jake and I had never really discussed having children. We had been married almost three years and having children didn’t seem important. Having children now didn’t seem important. All I wanted was John’s companionship, and yes, even love. This revelation startled me. I was falling in love with John. Or was I? I had known him a week and already I loved him? Maybe this was just a serious case of lust combined with fantastic sex. I didn’t know what to think. I was seriously confused and that’s all I knew.
* * *
“Calling the doctor for any particular reason?” asked Beth.
She tracked me down in my classroom during lunch. I didn’t go see John in the teacher’s lounge like I usually did. But I had called and scheduled a doctor’s appointment for later that week to get birth control. I couldn’t face seeing John right now. My feelings for him were so confused. It didn’t help when I thought about the birth control and the sexual freedom it would give me.
“Birth control,” I responded.
“Ah,” Beth said while raising her eyebrows.
“Condoms just get annoying after awhile.”
“Did you tell John?”
“Yes, we discussed it last night. He even offered to take me to the doctors.”
“Wow, this is sounding more serious by the minute.”
“Tell me about it,” I said while turning my back to Beth and walking to my desk.
“Nothing, just tired.”
“I could almost believe that if I didn’t know you better Jan. Now, tell me what’s wrong?”
What was I supposed to say? “I have very confused feelings for John and I think I’m falling in love.” It sounded so stupid to me.
“I know what this is,” Beth said with a knowing voice.
“What?” I asked a little too quickly.
“You’re falling in love with John!”
“No, I’m not!” I most definitely denied too quickly.
Beth raised her eyebrows at me and gave me a look that said “Yeah, right!”
“Well, maybe I am a little. I don’t know…I am just so confused. Maybe this is just a bad case of lust. Hot sex will do that.”
“You have a lot of sex right now, but it’s not the only thing you do. I don’t think this relationship is built on sex alone. The sex is so good right now because both of you have been without for so long. Enjoy it. You’re a big girl with a right to enjoy a man who definitely knows how to please you.”
“I guess you are right, but maybe we should lay off the sex for awhile and develop other parts of our relationship.”
“Maybe you should talk to John before you make decisions about yours and his relationship without him.”
Beth’s remarks stung a bit, but I knew she was right. I didn’t know where to start a conversation like that with John. What if we ended up doing it before ever talking? At the moment he was very irresistible to me. I needed time to think.
After school John found me in the classroom. He walked in and tried to kiss me. I pulled away and hissed “Not here.”
“I just meant for a quick kiss. Although you standing next to your desk in a skirt seems like an invitation to do more.”
“Don’t you dare,” I said while backing away from the desk.
Before John could make a move, one of my students walked into the room. Luckily John and I were standing far enough apart that we looked innocent.
“Hi Sara. What can I do for you?” I asked the student while breathing a sigh of relief. I wasn’t ready to discuss my thoughts with John just yet. Especially not in my classroom.
“I’ll be sure to return that book as soon as I am done with it. Have a good evening,” said John and then walked out of the room.
After I helped the student I quickly made my way to the parking lot and drove home. I didn’t want to meet with John at school.
Much to my dismay I found John waiting for me in my driveway.
I got out of my car and greeted him.
“Can I kiss you here?” John asked as he made his way toward me. I was trapped. I didn’t have the classroom to protect me any more. I soon found myself wrapped in his embrace and enjoying his kiss far too much.
“Come on, let’s go inside and I’ll take care of you properly,” John whispered into my ear.
I almost went with him, but then I pulled away.
“I can’t,” I said, wanting to cry.
“Jan what’s wrong with you?”
“Nothing…I don’t know…I’m just so confused at the moment. I just need time to think and sort a few things out,” I said while walking to my front door.
“What do you need to think about? Having sex? What? I don’t understand Jan.”
“John if you really care about me you’ll give me some time.”
John looked hurt and confused. I wanted to run to him and hold him, but I just couldn’t. Instead I turned and unlocked my door. I stepped inside and shut my door without another word. I waited at the front door until I heard John get in his car and drive away.
Later, after some moping around the house, I found myself practically drowning in a tub of hot water and bubbles. I had poured myself a nice glass of wine and was trying my best to enjoy myself. Enjoyment and confusion do not make good partners. Ultimately I found my thoughts wandering to my feelings for John. I knew I cared for him deeply, but I didn’t know if I loved him yet. Maybe this was the beginnings of love, but I wasn’t sure. Beth was right; I did need to talk to John. Casting him aside like that was unfair. I found myself getting out of the tub and drying off. I had to go see John right then. Even if I wasn’t sure about whether or not I loved him, he was the best thing going on in my life right now. I wasn’t willing to lose him over some confused feelings.
On my way to John’s I got nervous. I wanted to turn around, but I didn’t. I kept telling myself to grow up and handle this situation like an adult. Soon I found myself at John’s house. I got out of my car and shut the door lightly. A motion sensor light came to life as I did this. So much for the element of surprise. I walked up to his door and reached up my finger to ring the doorbell, but before I could, the door opened.
“Jan, I’m so happy to see you. You had me concerned.”
“I want to apologize about earlier. I really wasn’t myself,” I said softly.
“Come in before the bugs get you.”
I stepped into his house and noticed he had been keeping it much cleaner.
“I see you notice my long lost cleaning skills are slowly returning.
I nodded and smiled.
“Let’s go sit in the living room. You can actually sit on my couch now.”
I followed John to the living room and took a seat on the couch. I expected John to sit next to me. Instead he sat in an easy chair across from the couch.
“I can see you need a little space right now,” explained John.
What a completely wonderful man. He might have wanted to jump my bones, but he was giving me space…willing to hear me out. Falling in love with him didn’t seem so hard.
“John,” I began, “I feel our relationship is getting more serious by the day. We haven’t known each other very long, and already you are conjuring up certain feelings in me.”
John smiled wryly, “I’m not the only one guilty of that.”
“So you have certain feelings for me too?”
“More like a certain feeling.”
“Love,” I whispered.
Within a second John bounded across the room and scooped me up in his arms.
“Yes, Jan, love. I know it’s only been a week, but I feel like I am falling in love with you. Even if it isn’t love right this minute, I think it will happen very soon. We are both just so nervous right now. Both of us were involved in very committed and loving relationships, which ended far before we would have liked them to. Now we have each other. You make me so happy Jan. Where ever this relationship takes us, I am willing to stick with it if you are.”
“Yes, John, I definitely want to stay in this relationship. You make me so happy too.”
John leaned over and kissed me deeply. I couldn’t help but to respond. My body craved his touch, his lips, his nearness…
“Come on, let’s go to the bedroom.”
I followed him silently to the bedroom. Once there, John made beautiful, passionate love to me. We explored one another almost as if we had never been together before. I ran my hands across his body, savoring his muscular build, and the smooth, softness of his penis. He in turn explored my body with his hands and tongue. He cupped my breasts and sucked my nipples. His fingers slid through my moistening folds, arousing me even more.
“John,” I moaned, “please make love to me.”
John dug out a condom, and soon I felt his penis sliding deeply and fully into me. It felt wonderful. I ran my finger over my clitoris, bringing on multiple small orgasms. John increased the rhythm and I began rubbing even harder. Soon we were both coming and crying out together as we did. For a long while we lay holding one another. I felt his heartbeat slow to a normal rate along with his breathing. I felt so peaceful and content. A thought occurred to me then.
“I want you to come with me,” I said.
“I thought I just did.”
“No, not that way. Don’t get me wrong, keep coming that way with me, but I meant to the doctors to get my birth control.”
“Ah, I see. So you made an appointment. That’ll be nice. What day?”
“This Thursday, after school.”
“I’ll discretely follow you in my car.”
“Yes, we still need to be discrete. Eventually we might be found out. But I’m not ready to share yet.”
“I agree,” said John, “We’ll have to keep this a secret as long as possible. My guess, though, is that you have already told your friend Beth.”
“Yes, I hope that doesn’t bother you.”
“No, not really. I think she likes knowing things other people don’t.”
“No doubt, but you can’t knock Beth too much. She is the reason we’re together.”
I told John the whole story, right down to the threat Beth made to pass a note that asked John to circle yes or no to dating me. He had a good chuckle.
“Sometimes you women are too conniving for your own good.”
“Conniving? That’s such a harsh word. I prefer to think of it as very extensive planning on our part. Besides, you ended up pretty well off because of our so-called conniving.”
“Can’t argue with that. Let’s get some sleep. I’ll set the alarm early so you can go home and get changed in the morning. I want to jog anyway.”
“Hmm…maybe I should try jogging,” I said as I drifted off to sleep.