I will not name the government agency where much of this story takes place. I left the agency several years ago, but I still have friends there, hence the caution. Names of the people involved have also been changed, of course, but other than that, this is what really happened.
I know that it can be foolish to trust memory to accurately relate events from eleven years ago, but I can recall these particular experiences with a vividness that can still steal my breath. I’ve also had the advantage of being able to compare notes with the other person who was so intimately involved with these goings-on. For the purposes of this story, I’ll call her Cindy and myself, Jennifer. I’m going to begin my tale in mid 1998, so let me describe what I looked like then: a 5’6″ twenty-six year-old with brunette hair cut stylishly short. I’ve been told often enough that I’m beautiful and when I see the way men look at me, I believe it must be true. Though I had recently had a baby, a good diet and strict exercise routine helped me to regain my pre-pregnancy figure quickly. My breasts were full and surprisingly perky, and I had shapely hips and legs that I was proud of. But, if I’m any judge, I think my strongest physical asset was my smile.
At any rate, it was in June of that year that I first learned of my husband James’ hypothyroid condition. We had been married for three years, and up to that point James was mellow, had a bubbly sense of humor and stayed in excellent physical condition.
He was conscientious regarding his diet and went to the gym 4 or 5 days a week for vigorous workouts. In fact, the gym is where we first met. I had been attracted to and turned on by his wonderful physique since the day we met.
But, in June of ’98, I gave birth to our first child and around the same time, James began to put on weight, despite his remaining faithful to his diet and exercise regimen. He was only 29 at the time, so you could hardly blame it on “middle age spread”. Besides, the changes weren’t only physical ones. James’ easygoing personality began to be replaced by erratic behavior and frightening mood swings.
As the pounds piled up and James’ conduct worsened, I finally convinced him that he needed medical help. This is how we found out that his thyroid gland had essentially ceased functioning and that he would be required to take medication for the rest of his life.
Reading and adjusting thyroid levels is not an exact science, however. The medication slowed the weight gain and took the edge off his behavior somewhat, but I never got my husband back. The man that I married was gone forever.
I could have handled his weight gain. After all, it’s not as if I expected the two of us would remain young and beautiful forever. My husband was very attractive, but I didn’t marry him for his looks. And, I probably could have eventually wrapped my head around the loss of our sex life. A dramatically reduced libido is one of the many unfortunate symptoms of hypothyroid disorders. I’ve always had a healthy sexual appetite, so it made the adjustment difficult, but I don’t think impossible. No, the hardest part to deal with was the personality change. The disease replaced my charming, energetic and romantic husband with a tired, irritable man who sometimes flew into raging tirades at little provocation.
As you can imagine, it was exhausting caring for a baby with a partner who required as much patience as the child. So, after three months home with the baby, it was with some relief that I went back to my federal job. For one thing, the change in environment was a welcome relief. I had a good deal of work to catch up on and that didn’t leave me much time for wallowing in self pity. Another, more important benefit was that I would once again have the regular company of my closest friend and confidante.
All that I’ve recounted so far has been painful to recall. Here, at last is a subject I can warm to:
I met Cindy when I first came to the agency in 1993, so I’ve known her a year longer than I’ve known my husband. We hit it off immediately and soon became inseparable, almost always spending our lunch hours and coffee breaks together.
Cindy has a contagious exuberance and a quick, ready wit that often had me convulsing with laughter. Her statuesque beauty and flirty manner have turned many a head in our building and outside of it on our frequent lunchtime excursions. Let me give you a picture of her to carry you through the rest of my narrative: Cindy is two years older than I and about 5’8″ with a wonderfully rounded voluptuousness. Her complexion is a glowing coffee with lots of cream and a smattering of faint, cinnamon freckles. Her hazel eyes often glimmer with mischief and her smile lights up her face and any room she’s in. To top it all off, dark, lustrous mid-length hair frames those lovely features.
Now after that lavish physical description, you might assume that I had a crush on Cindy. But, to be quite honest, I was not attracted to her so much as I admired her. But, you would, after all, have to be blind not to see how stunning she is.
Cindy also has a generous, caring nature, quick to offer a helping hand or a sympathetic ear. I told her in my first couple of weeks back at work some of what was going on with James and I, but I was reluctant to dump too much in her lap. Besides, a part of me felt like I was betraying my husband by divulging our marital woes. So, while Cindy had the general impression that I was miserable, I hadn’t yet related too many details.
On September 16, 1998, that changed (keep reading and you’ll see why the date is so firmly fixed in my memory). Cindy and I had gone to lunch that day as we almost always did. I’m afraid I was distracted, depressed and generally poor company. She tried her best to snap me out of it, but I could only manage tepid smiles in response to her usual banter. On the way back to work, we walked the first couple of blocks in silence when she leaned close and broke my reverie, “You know, I’m really beginning to worry about you, sweetie.”
“Oh, I’m so sorry, Cin! I realize what a drag I must be today. I… ”
“Don’t you dare apologize! With everything you’ve had on your plate lately, it’s a wonder you’re not comatose. When we get back, I want you to come on down to my office. We are gonna have an overdue heart-to-heart.”
“Look, Cin, I really appreciate the offer, but… ”
Cindy stopped in the middle of the lunchtime crowd on a downtown street and turned me to face her. Her hands went to my shoulders as she looked me earnestly in the eye and said, “Hon, you just don’t get it. I’m not gonna accept ‘no’ for an answer. I don’t care what work is waiting on your desk or mine. I’ve known you long enough and care about you deeply enough to take the liberty of insisting. You’ve been walking around with the weight of the world on your shoulders and if you don’t unburden yourself soon, you’re going to collapse.”
With that, she took my arm in hers and steered me back to our building and her office. Once we were inside Cindy’s office, she locked the door, pulled the guest chair close to hers and gestured for me to have a seat. After I was settled, she scooted closer, took my hands in hers and quietly spoke, “Talk to me, hon.”
I felt a welter of emotions swirling in me with no idea how to begin expressing them. After a moments hesitation, I tried to speak, but all that came out was a wracking sob. And boy, oh boy, once the floodgates opened…
With my vision blurred by tears, I saw a look of concern on Cindy’s face. She stood up and pulled me into her arms. My head rested on her shoulder and I cried like a baby. Cindy’s left arm encircled me while her right arm soothingly stroked my back. She murmured in my ear, “It’s okay, sweetie. Let it all out. Take as long as you need. You’re safe here.”
God, I can’t tell you how much I needed exactly that. With all that had been going on, I hadn’t realized how long it had been since someone simply held me; since I felt loved. And Wow! Didn’t I feel enveloped in love just then.
It was strange, though, that as my tears subsided, I began to be aware of Cindy’s subtle perfume, her warmth under my hands, in my arms and pressed against me, the swell of her breasts just above mine. I mean, we had hugged many times before, but this was different.
As this heightened awareness permeated my senses, Cindy pulled back slightly and cupped my face in her hand, asking, “Feel any better, hon?”
That’s when it happened.
I looked in her eyes, closed the small space between us and pressed my lips to hers.
Now, I have no reason to lie to you here, so believe me when I tell you that before that moment, I had never seriously considered another woman sexually or romantically. But, just then, I felt so loved, so wanted, I just responded reflexively.
Our lips touched for only an instant or so when Cindy stepped back out of our embrace. Surprise and confusion were written on her lovely features. She was obviously groping for the right words to say and failing miserably.
I started to babble like an idiot, “OhGodOhGodOhGod!!! I am SO SORRY, Cin! PleasePleasePlease forgive me! I never… ”
Cindy gathered herself together and cut me off sharply, “Jen. Stop it. Please. There is nothing to forgive. You are my dearest, truest friend. If a simple kiss were to ruin that, it would break my heart. So, let’s just calm down, okay?”
We both sat down again, visibly shaken. After a moment or two passed, Cindy looked up at me and asked with a forced smile, “So… where the hell did that come from?”
I buried my face in my hands, “Cindy, I swear I didn’t mean to… ”
She interrupted me again, “Please stop apologizing. I meant what I said. I love you with all my heart and I won’t let something like this drive us apart if I can help it. I hope you feel the same.”
“Of course, I do!”, I replied breathlessly. It’s just… just… ”
“Yes?”, Cindy queried, “‘Just, what?”
“God, I already feel like such a fool, Cin. Please don’t make me say.”
Cindy leaned forward and took my hands in hers again. “You should never feel like a fool with me. You can tell me anything. You know that don’t you?”
“Well, then?… “, she gently urged.
My hands were still in hers, but I looked down while I talked, “I, um, it’s just been, you know, so long. So damned long since someone’s touched me… held me… made me feel loved and wanted.”
Cindy’s hand stroked my hair, encouraging me to continue, “I’ve kept such a tight lid on things for fear of losing it, that I hadn’t consciously realized just how desperately lonely I’d become.”
“Not to mention desperately horny.” Cindy chortled.
We both giggled nervously at that.
“Yeah, I guess I am, at that. Kinda hard to deny it, huh?”
“So”, she said impishly, “If I give you another hug, will you promise you won’t try to rape me this time?”
“Bitch”, I quipped.
“Dyke”, Cindy countered.
At that, we both dissolved into peals of laughter.
When we calmed down, Cindy stood, pulling me to my feet as well. She opened her arms and drew me to her. I found the courage to speak in earnest again now that I wasn’t looking directly at her. Anxiety ran through and through me. My voice quivered with tension, “Like I said, it seems like forever since James and I last made love. He doesn’t even try to touch me anymore. When you took me in your arms, it felt so wonderful. That loneliness responded to your embrace, the horniness responded to your caress… and with all the emotions that were already roiling in me… I… I reacted without thinking.”
“Jen”, Cindy smiled and held me at arms length to look at me, “I completely understand. And believe me, if I was into women that way, I’d be all over you right now. But, as gorgeous as I think you are, and as wonderful a person I know you to be, I’m just not attracted to women sexually.”
She held my face in her hand again. “If you let something like this cause you to act differently around me… shyer, embarrassed, walking on eggshells… I would be truly crushed. I want you to promise me you won’t let that happen.”
With that, Cindy gave me a kiss on the cheek, a pat on the bottom and told me I had better scram, at least until lunch time tomorrow. She was expecting her boss to knock on her door any minute now to drag her off to an afternoon-wasting meeting.
As you can probably imagine, the rest of my afternoon was not particularly productive.
If you’ve also guessed that my night was sleepless, you get no points for clairvoyance. I mentally replayed the afternoon’s events on an endless loop, fluctuating between extremes of humiliation and horniness.
I knew Cindy was sincere when she said she did not want that day’s incident to change our relationship. I didn’t doubt her generosity of spirit for an instant. Yet, I couldn’t help wincing in vividly recalled embarrassment each time I realized anew that I had actually made a pass at my best friend! What I wouldn’t give to have that moment back!
The problem is, though, that if I undid the day, I would also lose the time I spent in her arms. And God help me, that span of time was haunting my night.
James had taken to sleeping in the guest bedroom across the hall in recent months. He had fallen fast asleep there around ten that night. The baby and I were in the master bedroom. I had the queen-size bed all to myself while the baby slept soundly in the crib next to it.
For the better part of an hour, I had been tossing and turning across that broad, empty mattress. Images from the day forcefully chased sleep away.
God damn it! What was wrong with me!? If, just a day before, someone had told me I would be mooning over… no, lusting after another woman, I would have laughed at the very idea. I knew I was no lesbian. I enjoyed the company and sexual attention of men far too much for that.
If I was honest with myself, though, I had to admit (but, only in the solitude of my own thoughts) that I had, on occasion, felt a twinge of attraction for another woman. But I’d never given it much thought and I’d certainly never pursued it.
What was different? Cindy, of course. I think I had fallen in love without my noticing it.
What a mess I was. It was nearly two in the morning and I was no closer to sleep than when I first got in bed. My nipples were straining against my pajama tops and the bottoms were absolutely sodden.
I knew what I wanted; what I needed: release. I had masturbated often enough, but never with a woman as the object of my fantasizing. But, if I was going to surrender to this, there was no point in doing it by halves. If I couldn’t have Cindy during the day, I would at least make her mine at night, in the privacy of my own heart.
I got up and locked the bedroom door. Slipping out of my night clothes, I sprawled across the bed. Silvery light from a three quarter moon came through the window and set my nakedness aglow. My eyes closed and my breath quickened in anticipation. It had been far too long since I had an orgasm at my hands or anyone else’s. I was going to luxuriate in this.
Memory tangled with imagination and raw need to conjure Cindy there in the room with me. Weren’t those her arms enfolding me again? Couldn’t I feel her soothing caress on my back? Was that the soft skin of her cheek pressed to mine? I was sure I caught the scent of her perfume in the air. And the warmth of her body clasped tightly to mine.
Tracing the line of my jaw down to the curves of my throat, I imagined the touch belonged to Cindy. Moving each hand to the other side of my body, fingernails raked across my collarbone. I stroked my shoulders and down my arms, leaving a trail of goosebumps in their wake. My already engorged clit twitched impatiently.
I moved my hands to my breasts and cupped them at the sides. Lavishing them with the attention they ached for, I massaged, kneaded, and caressed them. My index fingers slid upwards to circle my areolae, which had tightened with anticipation. When I finally grasped my nipples between forefingers and thumbs, a current of electricity shot through me, forcing me to gasp aloud, “Cindy!”
My mind’s eye invoked a vivid image of her suckling at my breast. I rolled my nipples between my fingers and scraped them with my nails as if they were her teeth. Waves of tingling, pulsing pleasure cascaded over me as I stroked those nubs up and down, up and down, over and over.
I could have come easily just from the attention to my breasts. But I was feeling greedy that night. I was holding out for a truly spectacular orgasm.
My hands left my aching bosom and slid down my torso. Every nerve was keyed up, on fire, as my head swam with images of Cindy. Past my navel, fingers traveled of their own volition, nearing the heart of my fire. I brushed through my pubic hair, feeling the sensitive mound of Venus beneath my fingertips. My breathing quickened as I (or was it Cindy’s hands?) spread my legs.
I slowly drew my thumb and forefinger up the fleshy sides of my outer lips. This pushed the inner lips of my cunt together, causing warm liquid to weep from them. The middle finger of my other hand (Cindy’s tongue) split the slick furrow of my sex. My muscles tensed involuntarily, and I caught my breath.
With a shallow delving, my digit gathered a silky smoothness that I spread over my inner folds. I began an exploration of my swollen labia that sent stronger spasms radiating through my body. My fingertip worked in slowly, knowingly. Wet sounds tangled with my ragged breathing to break the late night silence. Then, scooping deeper than before, I collected a finger full of that slippery dew and held it up glistening in the dappled moonlight. Taking the richly coated finger deep into my mouth, I tasted my lust.
Anxiously, I returned my hands to my sex, knowing I couldn’t keep from cumming much longer.
Thrusting two fingers into my sopping pussy with one hand, I coaxed my clitoris from beneath its hood with the other and was rewarded with a gush of lubricating nectar. My sticky digit tormented the sensitive bud.
I felt another shock of desire and moaned aloud. I was very close to eruption.
My fingers from one hand were working furiously on my clit now, and the fingers of my other hand slid in and out of my pussy while I arched my torso.
I let anticipation build, every sensation nearly too much. I was on overload, pushing, pushing, pushing toward my limits and then backing away.
Mewing with delight, I began to gyrate, making the bed springs squeak. My hips jerked in the air, and I shut my eyes, lost in bliss, hyper-aware of the sounds my sopping cunt was making as I fingered myself.
My thighs flexed, and muscles across my tummy pulsed in a quickening rhythm. Rivulets of cum coated my thighs. I looked down the length of my body and saw my knees pointing up, my thighs forming a ‘V’. Closing my eyes again, my mind’s eye pictured Cindy’s lovely face at the bottom of that ‘V’, her mouth fastened to the contours of my sex.
Her hazel eyes fastened on mine. There was electricity in their gaze.
This pushed me over the edge. A dam broke and pleasure overtook me like a flood. My body convulsed violently in the throes of the most shattering orgasm I’d ever experienced. Pulsing waves of ecstasy shot through me, their power amplified with every thrust of my fingers. My thighs shuddered as though electrified and liquid flowed out of me, puddling on the bed. Whimpering and gasping at the sheer intensity of sensation, I nearly passed out when, at last, it began to subside.
My hips collapsed on the bed and I calmed down, though my sex still twitched. I was wrung out; like a rag doll.
As the sounds of my panting stirred the air, I realized that I had just driven myself into a sexual frenzy while fantasizing about my best friend.
What, in God’s Name, was happening to me!?
I would have to sort it all out (if possible) tomorrow. Post coital bliss settled in and tension melted away. For what remained of the night, I fell into a deep and restful sleep.
The next morning I was staring blankly at my computer monitor when Cindy stepped into my cubicle entrance. “Hey, Jen. How’s it going this morning?” That irresistible smile graced her features.
“Oh, a little bleary eyed, but otherwise okay.” I replied. Just seeing her made me a bit giddy. I felt like a school girl with a first crush.
“Good. I mean, good that you’re okay, not good that you’re bleary eyed.” she chuckled. “Well, I’ve got some unforgiving deadlines that are gonna keep me occupied all morning, but I wanted to make sure we’re still ‘on’ for lunch.”
“Absolutely.” I suddenly had a vivid image of myself kissing each faint freckle that adorned her nose and cheeks. I nearly had to shake my head to rid myself of the picture. Cindy looked searchingly into my eyes for an instant and I briefly wondered if she could read my thoughts.
Then, with a “See ya soon” and a quick wave, she was gone.
I tried valiantly to clear my desk that morning so I could afford the long lunch break. Thoughts of Cindy intruded over and over again. I wondered what was wrong with me. Was this due to some post-partum hormonal imbalance? How in the world had I ventured so far in such a short time?
Distracted or not, phone calls were made, papers were shuffled and computer entries were logged. Before I knew it, Cindy was ringing my telephone. “I am almost, but not quite, done here. Would you mind coming down to my office and leaving from here so I’ll have time to tidy up a couple of details?”
When I arrived in her doorway, Cindy looked up from her monitor, beamed at me and gestured for me to come in. “Would you shut that, please?” she pointed at the door and then patted the guest chair next to her desk. “I’ll be done in a jiffy.”
Her gaze was intent on her computer monitor as her fingers danced across the keyboard. While she was occupied, I took a good look at her: the arc of her eyebrows, the clarity and color of her eyes, the slope of her nose, the curve of her cheek, the fullness of her lips. I felt the urge to reach out and let my fingers travel where my eyes had just been, when I realized I was staring.
Cindy was either too focused on her work to notice or too gracious to let on that she had.
Within a couple of minutes time, she closed several windows on her screen and stood up. Raising her arms victoriously, she grinned, “Free at last! Thank God Almighty, free at last!… well, at least until after lunch.”
Reaching down and taking my hands, Cindy pulled me out of the chair. “I asked you to drop by here first, because ‘A’: I wanted, no, make that ‘needed’ a hug… ” she drew me into her embrace. “And ‘B’: I wanted a chance to talk to you privately before we go to lunch.”
Still holding me in her arms, she continued, “You know, you cost me no small amount of sleep last night.” Before I could respond to that, Cindy went on, “I went around and around, thinking about you, me, us… our friendship.”
She stepped back slightly, out of the embrace, but with her hands still holding my arms, “And I’m pretty damn proud of myself.” she grinned. “Because I actually got it all sorted out.”
“Oh, really?” I replied. “Care to share any of that insight with us mere mortals?”
Well, since I am feeling generous today, I might be willing to shed some wisdom on the masses.” She couldn’t suppress a giggle.
When I mock-curtsied, she pushed me playfully back into the chair I’d recently vacated. But, then her luminous smile was replaced by a pensive expression. “I run around madly every day, trying to keep up with an impossible schedule: work, home, husband, son, and all that those things entail.”
“Oh, I know I’m hardly the only one.” Cindy went on. “You’re in the same boat, and so is nearly everyone I know. I only bring it up because it means that there are too many things in our lives that aren’t given due consideration before we have to move on to the next thing.”
Cindy walked slowly back and forth as she spoke, “But, that little kiss of yours sure gave the status quo a swift kick in the pants. You forced me to do a lot of overdue soul searching.”
“For one thing,” She stopped her pacing and gazed keenly at me, “I thought, for the first time, what my life would be like without your friendship.”
Cindy paused for a moment, as if to let that sink in. “Or… how my life would change if that friendship was diminished. It happens. It’s happened to me. A word, spoken in anger, that can’t be unsaid or unheard. A careless remark that’s misunderstood or taken out of context. And, before you know it, the entire chemistry of the relationship alters. Exchanges become guarded, coolness sets in and levels of intimacy disappear.”
With earnestness shining from her eyes, Cindy knelt down in front of me and took my hands in hers. “You are the truest friend I’ve ever had. When Andy (that’s her husband) had his fling a few years back, I might have flown to pieces without you. You were with me every day, listening to me rage, wail and babble. And every day, you came back for more, giving me comfort, patience and love.”
“When Andy Jr. was born, the hormonal storms nearly cost me my mind. And again, there you were, holding my hand, keeping me on my feet until I was strong enough to stand on my own.”
Cindy leaned over and kissed one of my hands, and I was moved nearly to tears. When she looked up at me, I saw that her eyes were brimming, as well. “It takes time to truly know someone, to see how they carry themselves in different situations. I’ve been fortunate enough to have been granted that time with you.”
One of her tears spilled and I brushed it away as she continued. “I’m always at ease in your company; not merely because I know with absolute certainty that you would never betray my confidences. I’m also secure in the knowledge that you love me as I am, warts and all.”
Smiling up at me, Cindy continued, “Now, I’m not a complete idiot. It’s not as if I didn’t already realize I was lucky to call you friend. It’s just that yesterday’s events brought things into sharp focus for me. And, I’m just smart enough to know what a rare and precious gift I’ve been given.”
Our eyes met and held for a moment, then impishness suffused her lovely features. “But, as you well know, greed is one of my gravest character flaws. I want more.” Her expression now became reflective, “Years more. I don’t want what we have to go away. Ever.”
Cindy gazed at me expectantly, but I was stunned into silence. Finally, I managed the feeble reply, “No fair.”
“What do you mean, ‘No fair’?”
Several tears had escaped and were flowing freely down my cheeks. I took tissues from a box on her desk and tried uselessly to stem the flow. “No one has ever spoken to me like that. That was like something from a book. And it’s hard to believe… all that eloquence… all that loveliness… was for me.”
“So, how is it ‘No fair’?”
“Well, you’ve obviously put a lot of thought into what you were going to say, and here I am, flat footed, unprepared.”
“Sweetie, I’m not looking for any kind of declaration from you. This was simply what kept me up last night and I needed to share it with you.”
But, since you mention it,” mischievousness lit her face again, “there is something you can do for me.”
“What’s that?” I asked warily.
“Since I’ve just laid my heart bare for you,” Cindy said coyly, “I was hoping you might elaborate on what happened yesterday.”
I felt the first flutter of butterflies. “I told you, I… ”
“Yes. I know. ‘Loneliness. Horniness. Caught up in the moment’. And if that’s all there was to it… fine.” I was still seated in the chair beside her desk and she was still kneeling in front of me with my hands clasped in hers. Leaning forward, she pressed her forehead to mine and lowered her voice to match the intimacy, “But, if there’s anything more, you should tell me now. You wouldn’t send me into a minefield without giving me the lay of the land, would you, hon?”
I rose from the chair while helping Cindy to her feet as well. Moving across the office, I stood facing the wall and away from her. What, in God’s Name, was I supposed to do here?! She was right. She had just ‘laid her heart bare’. I certainly owed it to her to do the same. But, at what cost? Honesty was supposedly the best policy, but, in reality, the truth could often do more damage than a lie. I was feeling lost in an uproar of conflicting emotions when I felt Cindy’s hand on my shoulder. Her other hand came over my other shoulder with a finger extended and a penny resting on it. “For your thoughts.”
It was then that I made the decision to trust in the love she had just proclaimed. Taking the penny from her hand, I asked her to sit down again. “Close your eyes.” I requested.
“Please. I know it sounds ridiculous, but this may be the only way I can get through this. And I better start now, before I lose my courage.”
Cindy returned to her seat and shut her eyes. A trace of anticipation showed in her face, which was otherwise serene.
I took a deep breath and found my voice. “I have always thought you were lovely; in fact, the most beautiful woman I’ve ever met.”
“Thank you.” she interjected quietly.
“I have, on occasion… ” anxiety shivered through my words. “Oh God, I can’t even believe I’m saying this! I feel like I’m walking the high wire without a net.”
“I’m your net.” she said simply.
That gave me the nerve to continue, “I have, on occasion, even felt a glimmer of attraction, which I never really gave any thought. I mean, before the idea even formed, I would brush it away as a fleeting impulse, nothing more.”
“Yesterday, one of those impulses seemed to arise just when I was most vulnerable to it. Even so, it might have resulted in nothing more than that kiss… one of those awkward, embarrassing moments that we would’ve laughed about later.”
I glanced over at Cindy, but her expression was inscrutable. “But, after last night,” I went on, “I doubt that I’ll be able to sweep away those feelings so casually again.”
“What happened last night?” Cindy’s voice was soothing and calm.
“Well, when I went to bed and the house was quiet, I couldn’t help thinking about what had happened here. You can believe I suffered some pretty fierce pangs of humiliation. But the more I thought about it, the more the embarrassment faded and I began to get… um… well…”
When I finished the thought, it was barely above a whisper, “I began to get turned on.”
There was no apparent reaction from Cindy to this. She did not move or even fidget and her eyes remained closed.
“I was tormented by that kiss… and the fervent wish that it had gone on longer… until… ”
A moment passed while I gathered myself, then, ” …Until I began to fantasize that it had.”
Having said that much, my nerves quieted, allowing me to continue less haltingly, “Cindy, dear, you and I have had some pretty steamy discussions about sex. We’ve never been shy about the details, either. But, this is different and there is no way in hell I’m gonna get into the specifics. I will simply say this: I had the most mind-blowing orgasm of my life last night while I was imagining making love to you.”
Cindy’s cafe au lait complexion deepened by several shades. But, as terrifying as it was for me to say them, it was a relief to get the words out. They hung in the silence for a moment, until Cindy asked, “Is it okay for me to open my eyes now?”
“Oh, I’m sorry. Of course it is. I got so caught up in what I was saying, I forgot.”
Her lashes lifted and the eyes that had sparked my passion last night were now fixed directly on me. Rising from the chair, Cindy extended her arms in my direction.
Gathering me in her arms, she whispered in my ear, “Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.”
She clutched me tighter, “Thank you for sharing that with me. I am… dazzled… by your bravery… and grateful for your faith in me. I’m trying to find the words… but I don’t think there ARE words… to say how moved I am that you trusted me so… completely.”
I turned my head to murmur in her ear, “But I DO trust you completely. And I’m going to ask you to do the same for me. Don’t fret about ‘the minefield’. You have ‘the lay of the land’ now. Have faith in me to bring you through it unscathed. I won’t allow those feelings I just revealed to damage this friendship. But at least I don’t have to hide them, which would probably just make a mess of things. Trust me?”
“Always.” she replied with a squeeze and a kiss on my cheek.
Cindy had always been a tactile person. It was common for her to lay her hand on the shoulder or arm of the person to whom she was speaking. And, as you’ve seen, she was prone to hugs and other physical displays of affection. So, I can’t be sure if it was my imagination or if she did become even more ‘hands-on’ in the following weeks. It was my guess that she simply wanted to make sure that she didn’t appear to be uncomfortable or stand-offish after my recent revelations. Or, maybe it was only my perception of it that had changed. I don’t know. I do know that I had certainly always enjoyed the easy intimacy between us before the recent turn of events, so I certainly didn’t object now.
During that time, I had increasingly intense fantasies about Cindy at night, but, surprisingly, I didn’t let them interfere with our relationship during the day. In retrospect, I don’t know how I managed to compartmentalize so well, but I’m grateful I did, as things between us seemed to return to normal.
We still went to lunch together three or four times a week, as our schedules allowed. Our usual relaxed and playful banter was restored and even our frank (and sometimes downright raunchy) discussions of sex continued. My ‘crush’ was not really a topic of conversation though, besides a few quips and wisecracks that one or the other of us simply couldn’t resist.
During that time, Cindy began to make occasional jokes and remarks that hinted at a growing sexual frustration on her part. I finally asked if she and Andy were doing okay. Nearly a month after our heart-to-heart, Cindy and I were having lunch in my favorite restaurant. She had been grousing about Andy again. Apparently, he had been required to do so much overtime of late, that his work on his thesis had all but halted and he’d had little time for Cindy or Andy Junior. This had been going on for a couple of months now and she was getting lonely and more than a little randy.
This was becoming increasingly evident in her conversation: “It’s been more than a month since I’ve had anything between my thighs that wasn’t run on batteries.”
That was an image I really, really didn’t need in my head right then, though I was sure I’d be using it to good effect that night. Before I could comment, she was at it again.
“You know, since I’m not getting any at home, am I at least having fun in your head at night?”
I nearly choked on my salad and Lord only knows how many shades of red I must have turned.
“Ooooohhhh!” Cindy cooed. “Apparently so! Care to give any details?”
I struggled to keep my voice down, so as not to be overheard by the other patrons, “I can’t believe you just went there! Are you TRYING to be cruel?”
“No.” Contrition was written on her features. “No. Of course not. I’m sorry. I guess horniness just makes me bitchy.”
Then, with an exaggerated look of remorse, she asked, “Forgive me?” But she couldn’t hold the expression and instead began to giggle. I couldn’t help but join in.
Later that night, my husband James was in a terrible mood and began a bitter fight with no real provocation. Every attempt I made to calm him, only seemed to exasperate him further. When I couldn’t take any more, the baby and I retreated to the master bedroom. I locked the door and he actually stood outside it for several more minutes railing at me. At last, he gave up and stormed out of the house. James didn’t return until the small hours and didn’t speak to me when he came in.
The next morning, I was at my desk, trying unsuccessfully to work despite a killer headache. I buzzed Cindy to see if she had aspirin or some such. She offered to bring it to me, but I asked if she minded if I hid out in her office for a short while. My cubicle afforded no privacy and I really needed to put my head down for a bit.
When I arrived at her office, she shut the door behind me and turned off the top light, leaving the windowless room only dimly lit by the lamp on her desk. “I thought that might help.” She handed me the aspirin and a small cup of water. “Would you rather I drove you home?”
“Thanks,” I smiled weakly and swallowed the medicine, “but, I should be okay, if I can just lay my head down for a few.” Cindy made a makeshift pillow from her jacket and placed it on her desk. She insisted that I occupy her chair so that I could put my legs comfortably under the desk while I rested. “But, where are you?… ” I began, when she held up the key to her office and grinned. “I’ll be back in a little while and I’ll make sure you’re undisturbed for the duration.” With that, she turned and left, locking the office behind her.
I must’ve fallen asleep pretty quickly, because I have no idea how much time had passed when I heard Cindy turning the key in the lock again. “How’s my sleeping beauty doing?” she asked as I lifted my head gingerly.
“Ha! I know I must look a rumpled mess, but keep it up. Flattery will get you everywhere.”
“Better be careful what you say or I may just try to find out just how far it will get me.” She spoke in the playfully seductive tones she often adopted when flirting with some of our male co-workers. They had even been facetiously used on me a few times. But that had been before I ‘came out’. It was encouraging to think that she really was settling back into our old comfort level.
“How long have I been out?” I queried.
“‘Bout half an hour.”
“Oh. Well, I’d better get back… ”
Stepping behind me, Cindy placed her hands on my shoulders to keep me seated. “Not just yet. Let my magic fingers do their work first.” Bringing her middle and index fingers to either side of my head, she applied them to my temples. “Close your eyes and lean back.” she gently commanded.
My head lolled against her body and I became aware of the tantalizing weight and volume of her breasts pressed against me. All I could think of was turning my head, taking one of those treasures between my lips and suckling like a babe. I tried my damnedest NOT to dwell on it, but that’s like being told not to visualize a pink elephant. It takes one helluva distraction to get that image out of your head!
Luckily for me, Cindy’s fingers were indeed ‘magic’. The steady circular pressure at my temples was wonderfully soothing. She eventually had me on the verge of sleep again and I let a sigh of contentment escape.
A subtle change occurred when her fingers left my temples to brush the hair on either side of my head behind my ears. Her fingertips caressed the sides of my throat while her thumbs applied a little more force to the back of my neck. I wore a collarless, close-fitting knit blouse that didn’t impede her progress.
A couple of years prior to this, I had revealed a weakness of mine to Cindy. We’d been engaged in one of our frequent, sexually-themed gab fests. I told her that if James wanted to ‘put me in the mood’, all he had to do was start to give me a massage. “Just a few well executed strokes and I’m putty in his hands. Achilles had it easy. All he had to worry about was his heel. Me? You can start on my heel, knee, elbow, back or shoulders. Give any of them a good rub, and they’re all erogenous zones.”
Had Cindy forgotten this? Because, at the moment, she had made her way to my shoulders, and the deep, sensuous kneading she was giving them was making relaxation the furthest thing from my mind! My body was remembering all too well where this sort of activity had usually led in the past. I opened my eyes and looked down, appalled to see that my tight blouse did nothing to disguise my state of arousal. And even a subtle shift of my legs made the gathering moisture in my panties readily apparent to me.
Should I ask her to stop? If so, how would I explain myself? Should I just tell her the truth?
Just then, her hands guided me forward to lay my head down on the pillow of her jacket again. Moving to my shoulder blades now, Cindy extended her fingers over them while her thumbs made luscious circles over my spine. Goosebumps spread under my blouse and were surely visible above my neckline. I was also fairly certain that I could detect the scent of my excitement, as well.
This was way too close to my fantasies for comfort and since it wasn’t her fantasy, I needed to put an end to it.
“Yes?” Her voice was hushed, but easily heard. She had leaned forward to bring her lips next to my ear.
“Um, I should get back to my desk now.”
I was casting about for an answer when she leaned closer and whispered, paraphrasing, “‘Just a few well rendered strokes, and I’m his. Just give my back, shoulders, or legs a good rub, and they’re all erogenous zones.'”
I looked at Cindy uncomprehendingly, while she moved closer still. “I knew exactly what I was doing. And now, so do you.” she breathed the words before bringing her lips to mine.
For an instant, Understanding still didn’t come, until she cradled my face in her hands and deepened the kiss. Drawn by the promise of her embrace, I rose from the chair into her arms. The voluptuous contours of her body pressed tightly to mine. There was a familiar warmth growing between my legs. I could sense desire radiating from her, as well.
My tongue followed the curve of Cindy’s mouth. Little by little, her lips opened and my tongue entered her. I got my first taste of the woman who had been the object of my most vivid fantasies. I felt her hand at the back of my head as our tongues laced and tangled.
Cindy pulled back enough to let me breathe. It took me a second to open my eyes. Her hands brushed the hair from my face.
“I’ve been dreaming of that all week,” I whispered.
Her forehead leaned against mine and she spoke in intimate tones, “You aren’t the only one. A few nights after that first kiss, I dreamed, too. A disturbingly erotic dream. About you.”
“Then, when you later told me about our ‘nocturnal adventures’ in your head, I had a pretty powerful waking fantasy of my own. I didn’t know what to think. This is so far from anywhere I ever imagined I’d be, it’s hard to think how I got here.
But here is where I am. Here with you. And, if I’m honest with myself, there’s no where else I’d rather be.” This last was said with a passion that was echoed in her eyes.
I changed the subject abruptly, “Do you have any sick or annual leave?”
Cindy looked puzzled momentarily, before answering, “Some. Not a lot, but some. Why?”
“Cindy, dear, for weeks now, I’ve been indulging in the most intense fantasies of my life, nearly every night. And, every single one of them, was about you. But, I’d resigned myself to the idea that those fantasies would remain just that… fantasies… and nothing more. Now, here you are, in my arms, telling me that my dearest dreams may come true.”
A shiver of excitement ran through my voice, “I am a hair’s breadth away from locking your office door, tearing the clothes from that delectable body and ravishing you right here and now.”
Cindy’s eyes widened in surprise at my ardor, but there was an answering lust in them as well.
“Do you know what’s preventing me?” I asked.
“Sheer, naked greed. As I look around this room, I realize there isn’t space or leisure to do all the things I plan to do to you. I haven’t waited this long to settle for a quickie.”
“Besides,” I leaned over and licked her bottom lip, then looked up into her eyes, “I definitely intend to make you scream.”
Cindy responded by placing her hand on the back of my neck and pulling me to her. Our lips met. Hungrily. She pressed me back against her desk while our tongues eagerly dueled.
When we finally came up for air, our breathing was labored.
“I want you to myself… somewhere we can run riot.” I said. “Can you take tomorrow off?”
Cindy smiled her reply, “I’ll find a way.”
The next day found me pacing back and forth across the lush carpet of a handsomely appointed hotel suite. The hotel was located in a suburb just north of the city, well away from work and nowhere near where Cindy or I lived.
I had reserved the suite and Cindy was on her way.
This is what I wanted, what I had literally dreamed of. Yet, I was terrified. I was about to commit adultery. I was going to make love to another woman! And not just any woman, but my best friend. This is not a direction I could have predicted my life taking just six months ago.
My reverie was interrupted by a knock at the door. “Who is it?” I called out.
When I opened the door, my fears melted in the glare of her beauty. I stood there gawking for a moment, drinking her in.
“You gonna let me in or are you planning to take me right here in the doorway?” I pulled her into the room, shut the door and stood on tiptoe to steal a welcoming kiss. Wrapping me in her arms, she returned the kiss eagerly.
“Thank you.” she said at last. “I needed that to chase away the butterflies.”
“You, too, huh?” I thought for a moment, then taking her hands in mine, I asked, “Cin, is this what you want?”
“Are you sure? Because, I… ”
Cindy’s features took on a mock sterness. “Look. Where’s the bold woman who only yesterday threatened to tear the clothes from my body and ravish me in my office? I was brought here with the promise that you’d make me scream. Are you as good as your word?”
“Better.” I answered simply. She had returned my confidence to me, and it showed in my smile.
With that, I took her hand in mine and led her to the bedroom.
Kneeling naked on the bed and straddling her hips, I had a breathtaking view of the beauty sprawled on her back beneath me. Cindy’s hair splayed about the pillow, providing a dark, lustrous frame for her face. Her creamy brown skin was radiant, with a dusting of freckles on her face, neck and shoulders. Her breasts were bountiful mounds of flesh with large, puffy areolae atop them. Splendor such as this demanded to be worshiped. My hands wrapped around their curvatures and gently squeezed them. Caressed them. Kneaded them.
Already, Cindy was squirming. I glided over the contours of her breasts with the backs of my fingers and then made the return trip with the palms of my hand. Her eyes squeezed shut and indescribably sexy sounds escaped her lips.
One hand at a time, I dipped my middle and ring fingers into my sex. I was rewarded with a thick coating of lubricating nectar. Scissoring Cindy’s rigid nipples between those slippery digits, my manipulations drew still more ecstatic sounds from her. After my fingers and nails had explored every aspect of her breasts, I repeated the journey with lips and tongue; bathing them; suckling them; adoring them.
Shifting my hips down from her waist, I scooted down a bit so that my body was parallel to hers. This left behind a sticky puddle of my juices on her belly. I laid down directly on top of her, undulating slightly, causing the puddle to smear, making wonderful gooey sounds. We were hips to hips, breasts mashed wonderfully to breasts. I tasted the lobes of her ears and the curves of her throat. Cindy gave me sighs and gasps in return.
My mouth continued southward. I kissed my way down her left breast, engulfing the nipple and as much breast as my mouth could take. With my hand pushing the breast upward, I sucked and licked the end of the breast eagerly. Drawing it deep into my mouth, I gazed up at Cindy as her head pushed into the pillow, eyes clenched as she relished this moment. Her body writhed beneath me.
I stopped my attentions to raise up on my arms, moving upward so that my right breast eased into her mouth. Cindy cradled the flesh with her hand while she sucked fervently. The sound of it was heaven and the sensation was beyond description. Her tongue alternated between lashing the nipple and swirling around the areola. I lifted my head and let out a rapturous cry.
For me, this was a fantasy made real, almost too intensely real. I needed to reapply myself to her ecstasy, before I lost control sooner than I wanted. So, slipping my breast from her mouth, I began a slow trail of kisses down the length of her torso. Her belly trembled with my attentions. When I reached her pubic hair, her hips were already moving in a subtle rhythm.
Shifting lower still, I got my first close-up look at another woman’s sex. I nearly gasped at the sheer carnality of it. The shape and scent of it. The sensuous contour of the mons. The nether lips open and waiting. They were a perfectly matched pair of petals with a thin sheen of honey covering them. The plump perfection of her clitoris, fully engorged, peeked from its pink cloak.
Cindy’s body shuddered as my fingers brushed the silken folds of her pussy, tentatively at first. Then I made another pass. And another. Coating my fingers in her juices. “Oh God, that feels good!” she hissed.
I stopped abruptly, shifting my attention to her legs. Turning to my left, I explored the sensitive flesh of her inner thigh with my mouth. Every kiss, nibble, gentle suck, and caress of my tongue drew a delightful response. And those reactions grew more dramatic the closer I came to her cleft. Just when I should’ve reached it, I passed over her sex and began a tour of her right thigh. Cindy groaned in frustration and whispered, “Please.”
“Soon.” I promised.
By the time I finished with her right thigh, Cindy was panting. I then began to massage both her thighs with my hands, working up and back from her yearning, sopping cunt. Her hands clutched the sheets and her legs trembled and clenched. I loved being able to do this to her. I looked rapturously at the elegant shape of her intimate flesh, at how it had blossomed under my touch. That was amazing.
Even more amazing, I was about to put my mouth to another woman’s sex. Imagine that.
As soon as my lips descended on her labia, Cindy’s hips lifted from the bed and she drew her breath in sharply. My fingers slid up and down the outside of her soft thighs and hips. From there, my hands slipped under her wonderfully rounded bottom and drew her to me. Flattening my tongue, I swept up and down the length of her weeping slit, over and over.
Cindy’s breathing came faster, mixed with little half moans. Ripples of tension coursed through her. Each lasted a moment longer than the one before, and the intervals between them shortened. Her vaginal lips parted, welcoming me to drink her in.
Her hands abandoned the sheets to tangle in my hair, drawing me deeper into her. I speared her with my tongue, pushing through her opening to the tightness within. My lips fastened on her and I began to lap and swallow her copious flow. The folds of her womanhood clutched at my tongue as if drawing me into a trap.
Moaning and gasping were done now, as Cindy shrieked her pleasure to the room. “PleasePleasePlease!!!” she begged, though her passion made the words almost unintelligible.
Eagerly granting her wish, I slid her clit between my lips and sucked it in and out, then swirled my tongue around it briskly. Cindy’s thighs clamped around my head and she screamed for me to make her come. My tongue whipped fiercely, sending her to the brink.
But, as soon as she was there, I moved away, watching her hips pumping and pussy twitching and seeping. “What are you doing!?”
I watched and waited.
Three short strokes of my tongue along the tip of her clit brought Cindy’s hips further off the bed, her thighs held open and trembling. I slipped inside her again, flexing my tongue, pushing it in and out until her body began to rock in a sympathetic motion.
“Oh God….” she gasped, her eyebrows knotting up “Do you… have any idea… what you’re doing to me!?” I held still, feeling her cunt throb against my mouth. Her juices dripped down to my fingers, which were molded to the rounded softness of her bottom.
I had let her anticipation build, wanting her to need it, to ache for it.
And now, she was there.
I wrapped my mouth around her clit and sucked rapaciously. Cindy squirmed with delight, as my tongue flicked back and forth across her engorged nub. The more I nursed, the higher Cindy’s body rose off the mattress. I held firm to her ass and squeezed.
Cindy squeezed her legs more tightly around my head, then released them and spread. With that, I began alternating between sucking her clit and thrusting my tongue deep inside her pussy.
“Oh, God. Yes. There. That’s it. Jen. Jen. JenJenJen! I’m cumming,” she cried. “Oh fuck..Oh..oh…oh…don’t stop…oh God…right there….here it comes…keep going…keep going…oh oh please… Suck me… OH!” This dissolved into a series of cries that contained no clear words, but the meaning was explicit.
The orgasm struck her hard and fast, exploding within her. Making her spasm. Making her hips pump in and out, with me holding on for dear life. I kept my mouth and tongue on her sweet, wet opening. And with each new pulse of her body I was rewarded with more of her taste.
Once her bliss subsided and her thighs began to relax, Cindy’s hips came to rest on the bed. But, I had no mercy and seemingly, no end of lust for this woman.
I continued licking as she tried to pull away. My tongue opened her, pointing and dipping inside of her, then curled, drawing out her cream.
Cindy moaned again. I attacked her still rigid clitoris with my mouth. I used my tongue to torment the sensitive bud, sucking it into my mouth and letting my tongue lave it, back and forth. My arms pulled her thighs tighter to me and I fucked her with my tongue, wanton in my desire for her. Not a minute had gone by before Cindy’s body bucked violently in the throes of a second and more powerful orgasm. And then a third. And then again.
Cindy finally begged. “Please. Stop. Jen, stop. I can’t take any more.”
I gave in, laying my head on her thigh. We rested together for a moment.
“My God, Jen. That was magnificent.” I kissed her leg. Then bit it softly, enjoying the soft, smooth skin in my mouth.
“Come up here so I can kiss you,” Cindy demanded.
Easing myself from between her thighs, I smiled at her expression of disbelief. My face glistened with her honey.
Cindy lay limply above me with her legs spread apart, her head on the pillow and her dark hair damp on her forehead.
I crawled up next to her to snuggle, draping my left arm and leg over her spent form. Reaching up, I turned her head to look at me, and said, “I love you.”
“Don’t I know it.” she smiled. “I’ve never felt so loved. So… satisfied. Thank you.” After we kissed, Cindy licked her juices from my face.
Her long lashes began to drowse, “I think you must’ve stolen every last spark of energy from my body. I didn’t know it was possible to cum so much in such a short time.” Her lips curved up again, faintly this time. “Can you give me just a moment, hon? I need to rest my eyes for a… ” Her voice trailed off and stillness settled on her features.
Still abuzz with sexual energy, I sat up cross-legged beside her, grateful for the opportunity to watch her while she slept. Cindy’s beauty had always insinuated upon my awareness. She had the kind of exquisite loveliness that couldn’t be ignored. But now, given the chance to let my eyes linger unselfconsciously, I was in awe.
Her face was turned up to the ceiling, the sensuous geometry of it calculated to seduce the eye. She lay on her back with shapely arms, toned but not muscular, stretched on either side of her. Even on her back, gravity could only do so much to tame those incredible breasts. Their bounty was matched by their sumptuous symmetry – heavy globes surmounted by distended brown nipples. Her belly was subtly rounded but firm, the lower part hidden by the angle of her pelvis, which turned away from her torso in my direction. A trim waist flared into full, shapely hips. Hips tapered into curvaceous, womanly legs which were all but irresistible to touch.
So I didn’t resist. My hand glided over her velvety skin while my eyes soaked in the rich, glowing color of it. What man or woman could fail to be moved by such allure? Certainly not me.
I have always been visually oriented. It’s not uncommon for me to be moved by the way a full moon’s light falls on a cloud formation or the contrasting colors in a stand of blossoming trees. So, it’s not surprising that I must have spent half an hour just delighting in her beauty. I was very much aware of my great good fortune to be there, in that place, and in the company of this woman.
Almost overcome with the intensity of emotion, I closed my eyes for a moment. I felt a tear escape.
Cindy’s hand moved over mine and her voice gently intruded upon the stillness in the room, “Hey, what’s that about?”
“Nothing.” I sniffled and grinned. “Just me being silly. I was looking at you while you rested… and I.. I got to thinking how very hard I’ve fallen for you.”
“That doesn’t sound silly. That sounds like a wonderful compliment. And just so you know…” she reached up, placed her hand on the back of my neck and drew me down to her, “You’re not alone.”
Our lips met, and she kissed me with a possessive eagerness that made my heart flutter and my pussy tingle. We embraced, kissing, arms and legs twining, hands searching each flesh. The kiss went on and on.
Cindy’s hand came between us, the flat of her palm between my breasts, tenderly pushing me to lay back on the bed. I reclined on my elbows, stretched languorously across the bed. My right leg lay flat while my left leg was bent at the knee, foot flat on the mattress. She crawled up beside me and laid on her side. Pressing her body to me as tightly as she could, she propped up her head to look at me. Her lips moved to meet mine.
This was heaven! Her tongue grazed my lips, inviting but not insistent. My lips parted and her tongue slipped between them. She explored my mouth while the cushion of her breasts were thrust tantalizingly against me. Her right hand roamed unhurriedly over my breasts, teasing my already erect nipples into aching hardness. I mewled with pleasure into her mouth.
Cindy’s agile tongue caressed and played with mine as her hand began an agonizingly slow descent down my rib cage, over my flat tummy, pausing to circle my navel and then lower. Her fingers arrived at the top of my pussy, just inside my downy pubes. I was in an agony of anticipation as she paused on the brink of my mons.
The tips of her fingers slowly skimmed up and down my slippery labia. The sensations were fiercely arousing, as were the wet, rhythmic noises her motions made. She kept up the slow teasing until my back was arched and my hands reflexively grasped handfuls of the sheets. I moaned with the kiss while she purred sensuously back at me.
Cindy broke the kiss, raining butterfly pecks on my lips, nose, eyelids and cheeks, before tracing down my neck to the hollow between my collar bones. From there, her tongue and lips patiently scaled my throat, along the line of my jaw, to my ear. Here she sucked the sensitive lobe and exhaled warm, shivery breaths until I was gasping.
All the while, her digits moved wetly up and down, tracing the furrow of my sex, forcing my hips to follow their cadence. Cindy whispered encouragements and endearments in my ear, sending ripples of lust through my body.
Despite the slow buildup, I wasn’t prepared when she plunged her fingers between my inner folds. “Oh God!” I cried out.
“Better brace yourself, darling, ’cause I’m just getting started.” Cindy taunted.
Her fingers moved on me so sweetly, opened me, delved inside me, then curled, extracting my juices. She moistened the hood of my clit with it, circling around. Watching, listening to me, sensing from my sighs and moans just which touches drove me wild.
Putting a finger on either side of my clit sheath, Cindy began to massage up and down, as if it was a penis and she was jacking me off. God, it felt so good. I cried out as she used her fingertips to coax my clit from beneath its hood.
With the finesse of a virtuoso, Cindy caressed the underside of my engorged bud, spread my nectar across it and stroked it relentlessly between her forefinger and thumb. Tension mounted in me and my muscles flexed. My back arched higher, my hips lifted off the bed, leaving me balanced on just my feet and shoulder blades.
Her fingers left my clit to penetrate me again.
Pumping in and out of me steadily, Cindy bent her head to cover my nipple with her warm, wet mouth. She suckled with a rhythm that matched her fingers. My loins thrust back at her, impaling myself on her hand.
I heard my voice begging her to fuck me harder.
The sweetness of my friend’s mouth on my tit and her fingers in my womanhood were unbelievable. I had never felt anything quite like this. Sure, I’ve had men suck my tits, but they had only done it as a means to an end. But Cindy… God, it was as if she was adoring my breast… bathing it, licking it like a delicious drop of cream, nipping it playfully, drawing it deep into her mouth.
I opened my eyes to see her lips wrapped around my nipple and further down her hand driving in and out of me.
“Jesus, Cin… that’s sooo good! so… so… ” I trailed off, losing the words in a haze of ecstasy.
She looked up from her handiwork and smiled, “I know, sweetie, I know. You didn’t think I was the only one who was gonna scream, did you?”
Her mouth descended on my nipple once more. Supporting my curving back with her left arm, she gripped the soft flesh of my ass in her hand.
Her right hand must have been a blur.
In and out.
In and out.
In and out.
Long smooth strokes.
Liquid sounds echoed from the bedroom walls.
I could feel my juices flow and I knew that they were streaming over her fingers.
My hips pumping furiously.
My nipples hardened and crinkled to tight nubs. The tingling spread. My heart raced, sending the blood pounding through my veins.
“Fuck me, Cin,” I managed to gasp.
“You going to cum for me?”
“Yes . . .” I wanted it now. Needed it.
“YES!” I was so close.
Cindy’s eyes met my mine, the intensity of her gaze fanning the flame within me.
“I’m gonna cum!” my voice was a plaintive wail, laced with desperation and exhilaration.
The walls of my cunt grabbed hold of her each time she thrust into me.
“That’s it, sweetie, just let go for me.” Her voice was husky with lust. I could see the veins in her neck.
I threw my head back and screamed her name. I’d never felt anything like it in my life. Crashing waves of the most intense pleasure ripped through my body. Muscles clenched and released. My pussy walls contracted around her fingers, flooding them with my cream. Bright bursts of color exploded behind my tightly closed eyelids. My nerve endings were a complex jumble of competing pleasurable signals.
But, eventually the violence of it ebbed, until I was only jolted by an occasional aftershock. Cindy lowered my hips to the bed and eased her dripping fingers from my sex.
Crawling between my outstretched legs, she looked up at me mischievously and asked, “How’s my honey-pie?” “My dear,” I replied when I could catch my breath, “I can say, with conviction, that I have been well and truly fucked.”
“Glad to hear it.” she giggled. “But, I hope you don’t think I’m done with you yet.”
“Oh no!no!no!no!no! Sweetie, I am done. I give. I surrender. Whatever you want to call it. No more or you’re gonna kill me.”
Cindy hooked her arms under my thighs and pulled my hips closer to her face. Between playful kisses on my still seeping labia, she answered, “Oh, I think that’s a gross exaggeration. There’s plenty more juice in you yet. Besides, if you surrender, then you’re mine to do with as I will, right?”
Her lighthearted pecks (which I must admit, did feel lovely) deepened.
Gliding her hand over my tummy and rib cage, she cupped and fondled my right breast. Cindy’s palm covered my rapidly hardening nipple and began to stroke me.
I couldn’t believe I was responding to her so soon after cumming. Usually, I was too sensitive and needed a while to come down before I began again. But, I could feel that wonderful tingle between my legs, the warm glow spreading through my body, and I knew she would have me again.
I gasped as Cindy continued to massage my sensitive orbs, her hand alternating between them. She pulled at my nipples, then just flicked her fingers over them, and then pinched them, but it was always gentle and definitely kindled a new fire in me. I could feel my sex weeping its appreciation.
As I lifted my head and looked down at her, Cindy made a show of extending her tongue. She then moved her face too close to my pussy for me to see anything of her features other than her eyes over the curve of my mons. I suddenly realized that this was the image that was a trigger in so many of my fantasies! How blessed I was to have reality actually outshine imagination!
I felt her fleetingly licking my hyper sensitive labia. She brought her mouth to my sex and formed her lips around me there, stamping it with her ownership. Her tongue wriggled into me, caressing my inner folds in an exquisite french kiss.
She slid her tongue into my center, probing me, plumbing the very core of my femininity.
After several minutes, Cindy halted her oral attentions and raised her head slightly to gaze up at me with pure lust in her eyes. I felt the fingers of one of her hands spread me open while a finger from her other hand found my clitoris. She began strumming the swollen bud at the same time she pushed a finger inside me. The wet sounds were so emphatic I must have been flowing extravagantly.
Pulling her finger from within me, a thread of shiny, clear liquid hung from it. Cindy held it up for inspection. It was covered in a lustrous glaze. I was fascinated. Looking straight into my eyes, she took it into her mouth and sucked.
She attended to her finger so thoroughly, that when she was done with it, I can’t imagine there was an atom of me left on it.
No matter, because she brought it back to my sex to replenish the supply. When Cindy displayed the digit again, it was literally dripping with my nectar. I was eager to see her to taste it again. She paused for a long moment and then my eyes widened in surprise as she brought it to my lips instead.
“Try it. You taste wonderful…” she smiled.
When I finished with the sticky offering, she took my hands and pulled me up on my knees and steered me to face the bed’s headboard.
I felt her breasts and belly and pubic hair press against me from behind as she raised my arms, placing my hands atop the headboard. Her sultry voice was at my ear, “There. Now be a good girl and hold onto that, hon. You’re gonna need something to grab before I’m finished.” The wantonness in her voice made me shiver.
She lay on her back and maneuvered herself so that her head was between my legs. Her hazel eyes looked up at me, glittering with hunger. The backs of her hands pressed against my inner thighs, easing them outward and lowering my pussy to her mouth. I braced myself for the inevitable contact, trying to hold her gaze. But, at the last second, Cindy winked at me, shifted her head, and placed her open mouth on the tender flesh of my inner thigh instead.
My eyes widened in surprise, then they closed tightly at her loving attentions to such a sensitive area. She switched to my other thigh, sucking, kissing and licking until I began to writhe over her face and bit my lower lip to keep from screaming her name. There was no point in that, though. I knew she would have her screams.
This woman was unbelievable! Only minutes before, I would have sworn that I was utterly spent. Certainly too exhausted to think about more lovemaking. And yet, in just those few minutes, Cindy had stirred me into another carnal haze… greedy, aching for more.
She brought her tongue back to my warm, wet furrow, licking and slurping up my nectar like a kitten with a saucer of milk.
My hips rocked with each stroke of her tongue. The occasional shudder shook my body, making my legs weak. She had a firm grip on my ass cheeks with both hands as she alternated long, hard strokes with fluttery lashes.
I was completely at the mercy of that magic tongue, hers to play with. Almost out of my mind with need, my pussy was throbbing, and I had never wanted anything as much as I wanted Cindy’s mouth on me right now.
I was panting, moaning, whimpering and whispering her name over and over… a litany of joy. And every utterance was punctuated by a thrust of my cunt. Cindy latched her lips around my mound as if they were shaped for it, sucking in her cheeks and nearly creating a vacuum. I rewarded her with an almost animal scream of joy, and arched forward, my thighs involuntarily squeezing around her face.
Her mouth shifted and she found my hard clit, now unhooded and ripe for attack. Those questing lips closed over the throbbing nubbin and sucked. She purred while sucking, which sent vibrations through my pussy and swept me up in a storm of pleasure.
Tension was mounting in my body and my muscles were all taut. I whooped and bucked my hips, losing all sense of myself. The trembling in my legs took over my body and my orgasm detonated within me. I began to thrash but Cindy stayed with me, milking me of all I had to give. Her mouth was fastened on me, tongue still lashing my clit, fingers still holding tightly to my buttocks. I ground down on her, as if she couldn’t get deep enough for me.
Then I felt her do two things at once: she burrowed her tongue deep inside my slit and she pushed a sloppy wet finger up my asshole.
It was like it started all over again. My pussy walls clutched her tongue. I was humping her now, with increasing urgency, and with each stroke Cindy was deeper into my crevice. Much the way a man would, she pumped in and out of me, fucking me with deliberate strokes.
I’m not sure how long it lasted, but that torrent of orgasms just seemed to flow on forever, taking me to a world of pure ecstasy.
Until I truly could take no more.
I realized I was still panting and moaning, so I made an effort to calm down. My hips continued to spasm from little whirls of pleasure whipping about inside me.
Now that I was quieter, I heard lapping and swallowing noises. My juices were flowing over her tongue and into her mouth. It was so erotic, my body shuddered with a liquid aftershock as if to offer her more. She accepted it all hungrily.
When, at last, she drew away with a sated look. The only evidence of her activities was the glistening wetness of her lips, which she slowly licked clean. “God, you are yummy! I could make a meal of you.”
“Darling, I’m pretty sure you just did. But, you’re welcome to feast on me, anytime.”
My legs were trembling and my chest was heaving and brightly blushed. I collapsed on the bed beside her and looked at her through eyes half closed. There were tears in them, and I had never felt so connected to anyone in my life.
Cindy smiled and asked, “Savoring the afterglow?”
“Hhhmmmmm. You betcha.”
“Well, while I’ve got you still feeling pretty good, I wanna see if I can extract a promise from you.”
“Smart girl. Striking while the iron’s hot. ‘Cause right now, I’m pretty sure you could get me to agree to any damn thing you want.”
“Good.” Cindy moved closer and cupped my face in her hand. Gazing earnestly into my eyes, she continued, “Because… I… I want you to promise me we’ll get to do this again… that this wasn’t simply a one-time thing.”
“Are you kidding?” Her expression suggested otherwise. “No, I guess you’re not. But sweetie, I’m the one who should be asking that question. Apparently you haven’t been paying attention, ’cause I thought I had made it abundantly clear that I am yours for the taking… whenever and however you want.”
Cindy beamed in response, but then bit her lower lip as a look of contemplation settled on her lovely features. “I don’t mean to break the mood, but what about James? What about Andy?”
“What about them? Wait, that sounds a lot more flippant than I intended. Look, hon, I don’t know how you feel about Andy, but I still love James.”
I was grateful she had brought this up. “I mean, James never asked for this damned thyroid condition, and I know I’m supposed to stick with him ‘for better or worse’.”
“But, there’s no avoiding it. I’ve fallen in love with you.” Cindy took my spent form in her arms and pressed her lips to mine in a long, delicious kiss. “And let’s face it,” I continued, “I don’t think either of us is well designed for celibacy.” That drew a giggle from both of us.
“I don’t know where this will all lead,” I went on, “but I do know that a year from now… fives years from now… or ten years from now… I will still want you as my friend… and… I hope and pray… my lover, too.
Eleven years later, as I write about this, the memory of that day still has power over me.
Eleven years come and gone, and Cindy is still my friend. Still my lover.
This is not simply a happily ever after, though. Life always throws some curve balls into the mix.
Nearly a year into our affair, I was ready to give up my marriage and probably a few friends so that Cindy and I might be wed. Not legally, of course. Our state still forbids gay marriage (Don’t get me started).
But I did want to set up house with her; live together openly. She considered it, but in the end, she turned me down.
She had brought up the topic of divorce with her husband (she never mentioned me to him), but Andy pleaded for a chance to make things right; to be a better husband.
And, to his credit, he did seem to turn over a new leaf. It was the thought of Andy Jr. though, that tipped the scales for Cindy. She did not want to subject him to the trauma of a broken home if her spouse was willing to make an honest effort. I certainly can’t blame her. Her empathy and loving spirit are just two of the many qualities that make her so dear to me.
James and I are no longer together. Eighteen months after the events of this story, I began to see a therapist. But the psychiatrist felt that most of my troubles stemmed from my marriage and so he wanted to see James and I as a couple, for counseling.
James would have none of it, however. He viewed therapy as an unwanted and unnecessary invasion of privacy. Whenever I would press him on the subject, he promised that he would do better and insisted we could handle our difficulties without outside interference.
This proved to be untrue.
Some of you readers might ask how my relationship with Cindy is any different than a mistress to a married man. I’m not sure I can argue against the comparison. I would only say this:
Cindy has never misled me. I fully understand our relationship and I have come to terms with its limitations. I am grateful for the time she gives me and the love and affection with which she fills it.
Some of you would, no doubt, point out that there are other, single men and women in the world. Some of you would also suggest that I was settling for less than I should.
On both counts, you would be wrong.
I will admit that it is less than ideal. But then, which of us lives in a perfect world?