I’ve heard some people say that in college you learn stuff about yourself you never even considered. In my case that’s very true. When I arrived at my dorm room on my first day of college and met my new roommate; Sam, I felt I knew myself pretty well. The geeky guy with glasses who would probably never get further than second base with any girl, and desperately trying to get a spot of popularity by being clown of the class.
I thought I knew the road laid out for me in the future; studying hard, getting a job and hopefully finding a girl, before I went insane from bottled up sexual need.
Sam and I clicked nicely and within a week we were best friends. We liked many of the same things but were also different enough to never make it boring. I was loud, rough and easy going. He was quiet, gentle and emotional. He could always crack me up with just a single word or a look at the right time. He was great that way. I was more of a practical joker, although I only ever tried to joke with him once. His reaction made it very clear that doing that again would mean an early death for me. Not that I needed it anyway. When we were together I always had a great time. Even if it was only doing homework together or our Friday ritual of shooting darts at the local sleesy pub and drinking weak beer.
We went through our first year without anything notable happening to any of us. We had fun, studied together during the week and got drunk on Fridays. After a summer break that was long and boring, we were both deliriously happy to be together again. I did notice he seemed a little more closed off towards me than the year before, but since he had told me before about his unbalanced family, I figured it must have been an awful summer at home. I felt my suspicion was confirmed when he started talking about finding an apartment for himself instead of the dorm during his next year, but I talked him out of it by assuring him that I couldn’t get past my exams without my study buddy. So we stayed in our tiny room and after yet another long summer, where he had spent half of it at my place, we entered our third year.
A few months into the year I started getting seriously worried about him. He seemed constantly down and nothing I said or did seemed to make it better. His grades were fine, so I could only assume it was something personal. He’d never had a date while I’d known him, and since I thought it might help if he got one, I started looking for a possible score for him. Not that I had been very lucky that way either, but at least I put in a good effort. This year I had been busy pursuing the school bimbo Janice. I have to confess I didn’t actually like the empty headed chick, but my dick had no such scruples and pointed to her like a compass needle every time she was nearby. Honestly I think I would have had a better chance of dating the president’s daughter than actually scoring with Janice, but with hormones storming through my brain, I put that fact aside.
My hopes were high for a big party in the dorm common room the coming Friday, and I did my best scouting for opportunities for Sam as well. It wasn’t easy, because I couldn’t figure out what his tastes might be. If I mentioned some girl to him and wanted his opinion, the best I could hope for was a shrug. He couldn’t have too much trouble getting a girl if he tried. He had that lean, dark, baby faced thing going for him. If he didn’t slouch he was almost as tall as I was and looked like some goth god with his jet black hair and dark eyes. For the first time it occurred to me that Sam might be gay. It wouldn’t matter to me, but it would explain a few things. But he was just as anti-informative about guys as he was about girls, so I gave up my quest for a date for him, until I could figure out exactly what he was into.
On the night of the party I was getting ready alone. Sam had for some reason forcibly denied coming along for the party and had slipped out early in the day before I could catch him and persuade him to go with me anyway. My mood was high though and my self esteem was climbing as well. I wasn’t too bad looking this evening I suppose. I still had waves of acne every once in a while and a tendency to get a minor tyre around the middle, but I had been swimming a lot to keep it down and my acne was mercifully absent at the moment. I had grown a last few inches since I started at college and my shoulders had broadened noticeably. My hair was still a muddy brown, but I’d managed to comb it down to a somewhat rugged look instead of the been-fucking-all-night kinda style I usually had no matter what I did to it. So all in all I thought I looked ok.
The party went well. Janice got drunk as a skunk and I swooped in to make my move. But then my wonderful plan failed. Drunk as she was, Janice had no trouble conveying to me that I would be selling snowballs in Hell before she would let me lay a finger on her curvy body. That was a rather hard setback, and I spent the rest of the night feeling sorry for myself and slowly getting fantastically drunk. Meanwhile Janice was busy claiming her rightful position as the football captain’s fuck toy and I then decided it was a totally lost case. It did absolutely nothing to elevate my mood.
When I finally wobbled into our room sometime early in the morning, Sam was there, sitting on his bed as usual. He was smiling and humming to himself while browsing the web on his laptop. In my drunken state I didn’t notice it at first, but after some cold water on my face it dawned on me how unusual the goofy smile was for him. I asked him about it, but only got his usual shrug as a response. Oh well. If he didn’t wanna talk, then fine. I usually did most of the talking between us anyway.
I crashed on my bed and woke up the next day with a magnificent hangover and a morning woody that could cut glass. My covers were crumbled at the bottom of the bed, and my shirt had spun around me endless times before coming to rest under my armpits. So there was absolutely nothing left to hide the tent in my boxers. No matter. I wasn’t shy normally and frankly, my head hurt too much for me to care.
The shirt kept pissing me off when I tried to unwind it and eventually I just ripped it over my head (with a moan of pain I might add) and threw it aggressively to the floor. It wasn’t until that moment I noticed I was being watched intently by Sam from his bed across the room. He was dressed and looked like he had been up for a while. At first I blushed a little about my hard-on, but then I shrugged it off and went to the bathroom. I could feel Sam’s eyes on me all the way through the room and I did wonder if I had something on my face or something. An inspection in the bathroom revealed nothing out of the ordinary, and after a shower and shave, I felt a little better.
When I came back to our room, there was a soda and some painkillers waiting for me on my nightstand. Sam never got hangovers no matter how much he drank, but he was very understanding about mine and often made this little gesture, for which I was very grateful. After pouring it down and putting on some fresh clothes I felt much more like myself and reflected a little about last night. I whined about my bad luck with Janice and Sam didn’t say much, as was his usual custom. But I could have sworn I saw him hurriedly adjust his face after smiling a few times. ‘Damn he must have had a great evening’ I thought. ‘I bet he got laid’. Lucky bastard. I confess I’m am awful whiner and I harped on about Janice for a while when suddenly Sam snapped at me, while I was halfway through a thorough description of the nice tits and ass I missed out on.
“Oh Christ, go jack off or something! Jeez…”
This was a pretty harsh outburst for Sam, who usually only shrugged or offered single word replies to my ranting. What the hell was up with him? He was grinning stupidly just a minute ago!
“What is up with you man? One minute you look like the cat who stole the cream and the next you act like someone died!”
He looked down and frowned at his keyboard.
“Sorry. Just got stuff on my mind.”
“Yeah, no shit. Wanna talk about it?”
He shook his head very fast.
“No! No dude, it’s fine. Just need some peace ok?”
He was slowly freaking me out more and more. His usual solution to bad mood was to go and drink it off at our hangout and slowly divulge whatever was on his mind during a long game of darts. His mood usually improved during the game, as he almost always won. So I suggested we did that later and was rewarded with his usual shrug. Oh well. I would just haul him off later, no matter what he said.
To my great shock however, he refused point blank when I attempted it after dinner. He usually gave some half assed protest and then went along anyway. Call me an ass, but I felt it was a good time to force him to go. Whatever was troubling him had to be bad and I would push him through the only thing I knew worked for him. Just the game of darts at least. Anything to cheer him up just a little. He was my best friend after all. So I started poking him. I’m good at poking.
“Why don’t you tell me what’s bothering you?”
“Oh fuck off.”
“Come on. Tell me!”
Shrug.
“What did you do last night?”
“None of your business.”
“Aw come on, don’t keep your mate out of the loop here! You got laid, didn’t you?!”
“Go fuck yourself.”
“I’m not going away until you tell me all about it.”
“That’ll never happen, so piss off!”
Hmmm. Tough cookie. But hey, I wasn’t a clown for nothing!
“Ok, I’ll make you a deal! Come with me to the Maiden’s Mug and beat my ass in darts. If you win, I’ll never pester you about it again. If I win, you’ll tell me everything. And i do mean e-ve-ry-thing!”
He shrugged. I cheered, grabbed his arm and pulled him out of the door. This was perfect. He would win and slowly tell me everything anyway. I didn’t care about winning or losing. It didn’t matter to me like it did to him. He hated losing. So of course he would put in his best efforts and I would just be good and sloppy and let him win. Not too obviously of course. He hated when people let him win even more than he hated losing.
So we got to the pub and got through a few watery beers and the first few rounds of darts. Still not a word from him. Hmmm. Maybe more beer was needed. As we approached the end of the game, I noticed to my horror, that despite my best efforts to lose, I was slowly getting ahead in points. Sam got more and more tight-lipped through the game and I saw no way of botching my throws without being too obvious about it. Our last beers were ignored as we both concentrated as if it was a matter of life and death. When the last darts were thrown, I won by two points. Two lousy points. I tried to save the situation.
“Look man, you don’t have to tell me anything if you don’t want to…”
“Yes I do. We made a deal.”
“No we didn’t, I made you come here…”
“Shut up asshole, you know me too well for that shit. I agreed to come here and you know it.”
Now he was really freaking me out. He looked close to tears. He glanced around the pub at the sleepy old farts and frowned.
“We can’t talk here.”
I had to agree with him there and grabbed our coats with more than a little apprehension about what he was about to tell me. It looked bad.
We were in no hurry to get back to the dorm and made our way slowly across the park we usually cut through. The sound of traffic was becoming distant and the dry autumn leaves whispered around us in lazy circles as the wind toyed with them. It wasn’t too cold, so when Sam sat down on one of the park benches I didn’t object. For once it was his turn to talk and mine to listen. For several minutes we just sat there in stony silence. I didn’t push him. I almost wished he never got the nerve to tell me anything. I wasn’t good at dealing with personal stuff. Not even my own. He cleared his throat and we both sat stiff as boards until he finally talked.
“Look… I… God this is hard.”
I just sat there. What else could I do?
“When you went to the party last night, I went down here and just walked around for a while. But it was fucking cold, so I went back when I was sure you’d be gone.”
He looked at his toes like they were the most interesting thing on the whole damn planet.
“I knew you were gonna go for Janice and when I got back, I couldn’t help but go and see how you did. I slipped in and sat in the corner. I saw her ditch you and eat Marcus for dinner. I saw you get drunk and then I went back to our room.”
I was lost now. What the hell was he talking about?
“I… I’m… glad she ditched you.”
I couldn’t help but reply.
“What the hell? Why?!”
He looked and sounded like he was about to cry. His voice trembled.
“Because…I… I can’t…”
I small sob escaped him and now I felt really awkward. But he was my friend and I’d stick it out with him if he needed it. No matter how weird it was.
“What? Tell me.”
He looked up at the cloudy sky and blinked furiously. He then shook his head and looked at his shoes again. The nearby streetlamp illuminated a tear as it made it’s way down his smooth cheek. I really wanted to hear the rest, now that I knew it concerned me somehow. I just didn’t know how to proceed. But as usual, I just blurted out something, because I’m an idiot.
“If you didn’t wanna come to the party in the first place, then why…”
He cut me off by shouting in my face.
“Because I was jealous ok! I couldn’t bear seeing that bimbo putting her clammy hands on you.”
I didn’t catch on. Or maybe I didn’t want to. So I just gibbered.
“But…but why?!”
His eyes flowed over with tears and his voice cracked as he looked straight at me and answered.
“Because I’m head over heels crazy in love with you. I have been for a while.”
Ok.
Right… ok…
After that my mind sorta stopped. He just looked at me, sitting there with a blank expression. His eyes still shone with tears and he looked like it was the end of the world. He pleaded with me.
“Please. Say something.”
I was so stunned I just sat there. I tried to piece together some rational answer, but the best I came up with was this:
“What do you want me to say man? I didn’t even know you were gay!”
He gave me a weak smile.
“Neither did I until last year. I’m still not totally sure that I am. But I…I love you.”
His eyes burned into mine and with a slight shock I realized that the look in his eyes was lust. He very nearly x-rayed me with those loving eyes. I was as straight as they come, but my dick didn’t seem to care. It loved the look and sprang to attention, just to make me even more confused. All this stuff was just too much. I jumped up and walked away. Yes, yes I know. I was an ass. But how the hell do you deal with something like that?
I went back to the pub and sat down with a new beer and a boulder on my back. God. He was in love with me. Jesus… God…anyone. And my damn dick just wouldn’t go down! All sort of stupid things went through my mind. Had he been ogling my package all the time we had been friends? Had he been checking out guys at the gym? Had he been trying to give me signs with the painkillers and sodas? After a while I came a little to my senses and knew that the gestures were merely friendly. Plus… if he did check me out… did I care? No girl had ever wanted me so badly as he obviously did.
I realized the truth in it with a pang. He wanted me. Not just in some sappy, stupid love-poem-girly kinda way. He ‘wanted’ me. His look had said it all. Damn. If a girl had looked at me like that I would have been over the moon. Honestly I had never thought it would happen to me at all. And I was still sporting a blue-steeler that was starting to ache! I had a few gay friends back home and it never freaked me out, but it never turned me on either. But the look in his eyes… I had to admit it turned me on easily as much as Janice. But… he was a guy, and that thought was scary to say the least.
And then there was the fact that he loved me. Oh boy. That meant a relationship. Could I do that? I was pretty sure that my family would be good about it if I ever brought home a boyfriend, so that didn’t worry me much. It was much worse thinking about the relationship itself. How on earth did you date a guy? Was there a butch and a bitch, or was it just like an extended male friendship? It weirded me out a lot. I couldn’t help but grin though, when I visualized Sam in a apron cooking me dinner and prancing around dusting stuff. No. He was still most definitely a guy. And so was I.
Somehow the image of waking up every morning with Sam in my arms sprang into my mind. That wouldn’t be half bad. The thought of intimate contact with Sam didn’t gross me out as much as I had thought it would if someone had suggested it to me earlier. In fact I would be willing to try it. I’d hate to hurt my best friend. And on top of that, if I rejected him, he would move out. I was sure of it. And that thought cut me like a knife. No, I couldn’t do without him. What would I do if he wasn’t there? I had to confess to myself that I loved him too somehow, but I had always considered it platonic.
But then… I had never thought of it this way. And in a way I was lucky. Lots of people lived their whole lives without finding someone as special to them as Sam was to me. I felt it would be insanity to walk away from this just because I was too chicken to explore the idea. I got up to leave and fished out my wallet. I hadn’t touched my beer and the barman refused to charge me for the beer as I had needed to ‘think more than to drink’ as he put it.
I almost ran back to our room and didn’t stop until I was looking at the rusting number nine on our door. I could hear myself breathing hard and tried to screw up my courage to open to door. With a shaking hand I finally reached out and turned the knob. The lights were off and I had to blink a few times, before my eyes got accustomed to the darker surroundings. It wasn’t very late, but maybe Sam had gone to bed early. When the door closed behind me I heard movement from his bed. In the faint light from the window I could see him slowly rising from his bed and coming towards me. Oh boy. How to approach this?
Somehow it felt good to have the lights out and it made things a little less awkward for me. But I could still hear myself breathing like I had just run a marathon. He stopped a few paces from me and just waited. My call now.
“I’ve been thinking.”
“I know.”
Oh my God. He sounded so hurt. Like he was expecting a rejection. I had to tread carefully.
“I’ve thought about what you said and… I… you mean a lot to me.”
He started to talk, but I cut him off.
“No, wait. Just, hear me out, ok?”
He crossed his arms and nodded. He was just looking at me in the semi-darkness.
“I don’t think I’m gay, but if I was ever going to try anything with a guy, I would want it to be with you. You’re my best friend and I don’t think I can live without you in my life somehow. So…”
I shuffled my feet nervously. Sam looked stunned. His arms dropped to his sides and he stepped a single step closer.
“So… what are you saying?”
I swallowed so loudly I’m sure they heard it all the way down the hall.
“I guess… I’m saying that I wanna give this a try. As long as you promise to bear with me, cause I don’t have a clue what to do.”
He barked out a short laugh, like he had been holding his breath.
“You serious? You really wanna try?”
I nodded as he stepped another step closer. He was now very close.
“I can’t promise that I can do this, but I want to try. I don’t want to lose you.”
He was so close now that I could feel his breath on my face.
“If you’re just doing it to keep me in your life somehow, then don’t. I wont leave you if you don’t want me to. I wont force you into a relationship just so you can keep me here.”
I could feel a hot blush fill my whole face. And my damn dick was practically reaching out for him. I couldn’t deny that I wanted this to go further. No matter what.
“I want this. I really do.”
I heard him sigh deeply. I felt his breath wash over my face and my eyes closed to the breeze. Suddenly I felt lips against mine. It was absolutely nothing like I would have imagined it. His lips were soft and it was a whole lot better than any kiss a girl had ever given me. Not that I had much to compare with, but I never expected such a gentle and soft experience with a guy. But then again, this was Sam. He was gentle in everything he did. As I opened my mouth to deepen the kiss, he breathed hard through his nose and pressed himself against me. My back hit the door and I felt his arms slide under my jacket and around my waist.
I heard the lock on the door click as he reached out and turned it. The sound made my stomach lurch. This was really happening. I put my arms around his neck and let myself enjoy the ride. He let his hands slide up and down my back and I shivered every time he brushed my belt. He gently pulled my shirt out of my trousers and let his hands slip inside and onto my back. His touch made my skin tingle and I gasped when the kiss broke. He looked up at me with a frown I could only just see in the thickening darkness and withdrew his hands. He was worried he had gone to far, so I shrugged off my jacket and threw it into the room somewhere.
I took his hands and placed them around me again and claimed his lips again with a smile. This was nice. Very nice indeed. My fears were slowly ebbing away and the lust which had been burning ever since his admission was rapidly taking over all my actions. I had a strange sort of rushing sound roaring in my ears and I could feel my heart pounding, like it was trying to escape my chest. I was all to clearly reminded that it was a guy making me hot, as I felt him press his hardness against my thigh, but it only served to make me even more needy. I let my hands roam through his hair, down his neck, onto his shoulders and his back. He shivered under my hands and my stomach lurched over and over again every time a little sound of pleasure escaped him.
Suddenly he grabbed me hard by the ass and pulled me so close to him that it felt like my dick was going to split. I loved it. Oh boy. It was like he had finally been convinced that I wanted this too and couldn’t hold back anymore. I felt his hands frantically squeezing and tugging every part of my body he could reach and I heard myself moan from pleasure as he pulled my hair and furiously ate my mouth. He broke the kiss very suddenly and stood back a step, gasping and panting. I felt extremely lonely and a bit hurt that he pulled away. But it only lasted until I heard him gasp into the dark room:
“Shit! That’s too damn hot!”
I pounced at him and he moaned very loudly as I ground my hips into his. I worried for a second that the whole dorm might hear us, but then I suddenly felt a slight tingle at the idea that the whole school would hear me making him moan and renewed my efforts to coax more sounds from him. He hugged me close and I heard his moans and cries right next to my ear while I ran my fingers through his hair. God he was right. This was too damn hot. He bit down on my earlobe without warning and unprepared as I was for the ecstasy that sensation would bring, I exploded right then and there. I whimpered and shivered as I spewed my load in my pants and it seemed to do the trick for him when he felt the wet spot on my front. He cried out and squeezed me so closely I could hardly breathe, while his climax slowly ebbed out.
We stood there leaning on each other for the longest time, just slowly getting our breathing working properly again. Sam was the first to break the silence.
“Wow!”
I nodded into his shoulder.
“If it gets better than this, I think I might have a stroke.”
My remark made him laugh and I smiled while nuzzling his neck. Even after his breathing slowed down, I could feel his heart pounding against my chest. It felt so right just standing there hugging each other, so we didn’t move. We just stood in the middle of the room; gently hugging, kissing and enjoying the whole thing. Sam sighed deeply every time I touched him somewhere sensitive. His neck, his back, his ear. Anywhere. I loved that I was having that effect on someone, and the fact that it was my best friend feeling so good made me down right gooey inside.
After another deep sigh Sam mumbled:
“God you are so sexy.”
Me eyes flew open. What did he just say? I pulled a little out of the embrace so I could look at him and frown.
“You gotta be kidding man!”
His eyes shone in the dark. Must have been the light from outside reflected, but it looked mesmerising and his gaze burned into mine.
“I mean it. Have you any idea how hot you are?”
I closed my eyes and shook my head.
“Now I know you’re in love. You only say crazy stuff like that when your brain is affected.”
He hugged me closer so his nose almost touched mine.
“I’m serious.”
He lowered his voice to a hoarse whisper.
“You have the sexiest ass I’ve ever seen. You’ve made me drool for the past two years.”
I still wasn’t convinced.
“Yeah right. Just like you have over every other guy, you horny bastard.”
I was hoping to make him laugh to break up the serious moment a little, but I must say my plan backfired there. He moved in even closer and whispered directly into my ear:
“I have only ever been horny for you. No other guy, or even a girl has ever made me cum so hard as you have, simply by taking off your shirt. I’ve had so many wet dreams about you. You’ve given me so many hard ons that I’ve worn myself out jerking off over you.”
I stiffened a little against him. I was slightly shocked and also felt totally unworthy of such worship. But as usual my dick loved every bit of it. I felt myself harden against him again and the wet spot in my pants became rather irritating.
He gently nuzzled my earlobe, making me sigh with pleasure.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to embarrass you.”
I was just about to answer when his tongue suddenly took a round trip of my ear. I heard the rushing sound in my head again, and everything I had thought the moment before was gone in my haze of pleasure. I vaguely felt him take off my glasses and caress my face, without his tongue ever leaving my ear. I shivered and moaned while moving against him to indicate that I wanted him to keep doing that to me whatever it took. He pulled back and looked at me. The room was very dark now and only the coolness suddenly touching my ear woke me up to the fact that he pulled away.
“Are you sure you’re ok?”
I was gasping now and pulled him frantically towards me.
“Oh God yes, just don’t stop doing that!”
He dove right in again, making me cry out when his burning hot tongue hit my earlobe again. His breath roared in my ear and my dick throbbed every time I felt him exhale. I never knew. God I never knew. I had no control over my hands and it took me a while to realize that I had been squeezing his ass forcefully all the time he had been caressing my ear. He whimpered into my ear as I gave him another hard squeeze. I was suddenly afraid I had been to rough and removed my hands. He moaned loudly and gasped out:
“No!”
With a strong grip he placed my hands back on his ass and pushed down on them hard to make it clear that he loved it. I wasted no time getting back to business. I have no idea how long we stood there. Him licking and nibbling my ear, me squeezing his ass until it bruised. It felt like forever and we still couldn’t get enough. I felt him move a little backwards and I followed, desperate not to miss a single touch of his tongue.
He suddenly dropped down and I was surprised to see we had reached his bed and that he had dropped down on it. I was just about to follow him when he smoothly undid my belt, my button and zipper and dug his hands into the hem of my underwear. In one smooth movement, he had me naked from my waist to my shoes. I had only a second to be embarrassed before he dove down on my dick as though it was a matter of life and death.
I cried out from the intense feeling and grabbed his shoulders for support. He took a firm hold of my ass and pushed himself down on me at a fast and hungry pace. I gasped and groaned and it was almost too much. The second before I felt I would have gone crazy from it, he suddenly grabbed my balls and gave them a gentle squeeze. Now it was too much! My knees buckled and I came so hard my vision blackened. I had no time to warn him. He didn’t move however, but just kept sucking until I felt completely drained and collapsed sideways onto the bed when he finally released me.
Oh God. My chest stung and I could still see little purple spots at the edges of my vision for a long time. I hardly felt him fumble off the rest of my clothes. I only noticed when he pulled my shirt over my head. There I was, very naked, in Sam’s bed. Sam himself had only been wearing boxers and a t-shirt and they were off in a flash. The bed was so narrow we had to be more or less on top of each other to fit in it. Sam was on top of me, running his fingers through my empathetical small amount of chest hair and kissing me gently all over my torso.
Now that my lust was somewhat sated, I got really scared when I felt him press his own leaking hardness against my hip. It was very sexy, but even though my dick recovered fast, my fears emerged as well. What would he do now? Would he fuck me? I wasn’t sure I was ready for that. He must have felt me stiffen or something because he stopped what he was doing and rested his elbows on my chest. It was now so dark that I couldn’t see his face. Only his eyes and the slightest hint of his frame was visible to me and it was blurred as my glasses were off.
“You’re shaking.”
I realised that I was. But all I could reply was:
“Mm Hmm..”
He ran a finger along my jawline, making goosebumps erupt across my shoulders.
“Are you ok babe?”
Babe?! He called me babe… oh god. It was surreal, but also a very comforting thing. He really cared about me. I knew then that he would never hurt me. If I said no, I knew he would stop. He loved me after all, and I trusted him. I relaxed somewhat but I was still slightly scared. If we did fuck, it would be my first time. At all. I felt him take my hand and intertwine our fingers. I sighed. It was just what I needed then, I just didn’t know it.
“I’m fine, It’s just… I’ve never fucked before, you know and… I’m a little nervous.”
I felt him nuzzle my nose with his own and rub his boner against me.
“I promise you, I wont go any further than you want. I want this SO badly you can’t imagine… but I’d hate every second of it if you didn’t want it too.”
I nodded in the dark.
“And… I’ve never done this either you know. Not even with a girl.”
My eyebrows disappeared in my hairline, I’m sure of it.
“No way! You’re too damn good at this! No way it’s your first time!”
He giggled and I felt his face burn, being so close to mine. He was blushing!
“Well I… I’ve read a lot. To be honest… I’ve often been sitting across from you, browsing gay sites for hot things I wanted to try with you. A lot of times I hardly made it to the bathroom before coming in my pants.”
Again he shocked the hell out of me. I never guessed. But being a wisecrack I couldn’t help but say:
“Well that’s what ya get from watching porn!”
He didn’t laugh. He just pressed himself so hard against me that I’m sure it must have hurt him.
“No…” He gasped and nibbled at my chin with his teeth.
“That’s what I get from watching you. It happened a lot too just by looking at you.”
My mouth fell open and he lunged at it. He kissed me so hard I was sure our lips were bleeding when we finally broke apart. He kept grinding his pelvis roughly against mine and his breathing was getting ragged. My lust was taking over again and I felt it was my turn to be giving something. At that moment I was so hot I didn’t care if I stunk at it or puked from it, but I flipped us around so I was op top and licked my way down to his dick. By the time I got to his navel he was mewing like a love sick cat and I drank in every sound from him.
I slipped between his legs and lightly scratched his inner thighs before taking a deep breath and diving in.
“AARRHH!”
He cried out so loud I thought the walls were shaking but it only spurred me on.
He didn’t taste anything like I thought he would. I had tasted my own cum a few times and thought it was slightly bitter. No turn on really. But the feel of his burning hot hardness on my tongue certainly was! His pre cum didn’t really taste like anything, but the feeling of it was fantastic. I got so hot from him humping my face that I gave it my best effort. His moaning was music to my ears and I was thoroughly enjoying myself.
I sucked him in as deep as I could and kept it up while pulling off him again. He arched his back and mewed again. I circled my tongue around his dickhead and gently slid my teeth across it. As I dived down again he lost it. He grabbed my head hard and shot his load. I did my best to swallow it all but some slipped out. Mostly because I tried to taste it. It tasted a little different from mine. Still bitter but in the heat of this sexy moment, it only fuelled my lust. I tasted like sex actually.
I could hear him gasping in the dark, mumbling all kinds of things.
“Oh fuck… oh shit, oh fuck. Aw man, that’s too good. Oh shit… oh I’ve dreamed of this for so long… so long…”
It made my stomach fluttery and buzzing that it was because of me he was gibbering like that. I swear, there’s no feeling like it in the world. Then suddenly a thought struck me.
“Houston we have a problem.”
He gasped out a shaky laugh.
“What?”
“I’ve just noticed that if you were planning any fucking action tonight, you better have some condoms stashed somewhere. Cause I don’t have any.”
He raised himself up on his elbows and said with a stern voice:
“You mean you’ve been hunting Janice for months without even having bought a single rubber? That chick is a walking chlamydia poster, dude! What the hell were you thinking?!”
I felt stupid.
“I know. I can’t help it. My dick seems to belive it’s his job to think when it comes to sex.”
He hugged me close to him.
“I’m gonna have to teach you a lesson or two about protection then.”
He kissed me deeply and I only vaguely heard him fumble with something at the head of the bed. I felt something very cold on the back of my neck and I yelped from it.
“Yeikes! That’s fucking cold!”
He laughed a quiet rumbling laugh deep in his chest. God that turned me on!
“That’ll teach ya then…”
I heard the metallic package rip open right behind my head and got slightly distracted. I was very aware that the moment of truth was fast approaching.
“So…”
I heard my voice tremble.
“How do we do this then?”
He made that same deep laughing sound again and made me shiver with excitement. His voice was low and hoarse.
“Well… I really should punish you for your hopeless lack of consideration and fuck your delicious ass…”
I held my breath.
“But then again… that would mean I would have to wait for you to fuck me silly some other time. And I can’t wait for that.”
I let myself breathe again.
“So… this is for you.”
He pushed the open package into my hand. I swallowed loudly. I could feel him hard against me again and my own erection was harder than ever.
“How do we do this then? You’re the one who’s read about all this stuff.”
His one hand was still behind my head, and then suddenly something else very cold touched my skin again.
“Gah! Stop doing that you prick!”
I couldn’t help but giggle stupidly and I gently punched him in the gut. We playfully wrestled around for a second before sliding back into our cuddling embrace. He now showed me the other cold item. It was one of these sample tubes you can get for free sometimes at drug stores and such. This one was some sort of lube. I should have guessed.
He was nibbling my lower lip and driving me nuts with soft touches all over.
“According to the sites I browsed, lube is a gay man’s best friend. So I got us some. Aren’t we lucky that I’m such a dreamin, schemin bastard?”
I laughed nervously and nodded. And of course, I had to ask the dumbest question in the world just then.
“So… what do I do with it?”
He snorted with laughter and grabbed my ass. Then he growled in my ear:
“What do you think, you moron?”
I blushed deep red. Doh.
“Oh. Yeah. Right.”
He started nibbling my ear again and my eyes closed.
“Don’t worry babe. I’ll get you nice and needy before we get there.”
I felt like it was something I was supposed to say to him, but I forgot all about it when he started on my ear again. That damn ear. He could have me completely in his power just by licking my ear. I had no idea my ears were at all sensitive. Must be all his reading that lead him to try it, cause I honestly never considered it.
I was squeezing his ass mechanically again. He breathed into my ear:
“Just start exploring whenever you feel like it. No pressure.”
Wasn’t I supposed to be telling him all that? In all honesty it didn’t matter, cause I really needed to hear some words of comfort. I was so nervous. What if I messed up somehow? God… I’d rather have him ream me with no lube than that happening. His next words came out like he had read my mind.
“Just do what you feel like. You won’t hurt me. I’ll let you know before you mess up.”
I was so relieved. He knew just what to say. I kissed him passionately and pressed myself against him. Do what I feel like… right. I felt like fucking right here and now, that’s what. So when I broke the kiss, I dropped lube and rubber on the edge of the bed and started my way down his body again. This time though, I took my sweet time. Kissing and licking his nipples, his smooth hairless chest, his ribs, his navel and the tiny treasure trail on his stomach. I found myself loving that trail. That was so hot! I let my hands slide all around his thighs and Sam bent his legs up, so the point of mutual interest was suddenly much more accessible.
He was whimpering and gasping before I hardly touched his ass. I caressed his buttocks and circled around the ‘hot spot’ for quite a while, before gathering my nerve to actually touch it. It was a very, very intimate thing and a hard border for me to cross. When I finally timidly ran a finger through his crack, it felt electric. The skin right outside the rim was so soft! I was a bit worried about the ‘messy’ part of that area, so while he was busy gasping for breath and digging his nails into the mattress, I snuck my finger up to my nose and smelled it. It didn’t smell at all bad. Nothing like the usual sent of the area. It smelled like sweat and something slightly sweet.
The sent was intoxicating and I suddenly felt very bold. I dug my hands under his ass and gripped him tight. Then I slowly stuck out my tongue and ever so gently licked him all around the rim. The taste was even more sexy than the smell! When he felt my wet tongue, he cried out again and made sounds like he was suffocating. He breathed in deeply a few times and then began gibbering like a madman.
“God-oh-god-oh-god-oh-god I don’t believe it, it’s too good, oh shit, oh fuck, I never thought you’d do that, oh jeez, oh fuck, I love you so fucking much, oh god, oh shit, oh my god don’t ever stop, oh please, please, please…..”
I stuck my tongue in as far as it could go, and he grabbed the edge of the bed so hard the wood creaked. He flung his legs around my head and pulled me so close to him I had to pull back hard to ensure myself enough space to breathe. I kept licking, while fumbling out a little lube onto my fingers and I kept up tongue bathing the area, while I slowly worked a finger inside. His gibbering was now mostly incoherent. Occasionally he would gasp out something audible like:
“Oh god!……… oh!….. please!…I love… Oh! Fuck!”
When I had been working two fingers in and out for a while he started begging me.
“Please, fuck me now! Fuck me now before I come! I want you! I want you so bad!”
I hurriedly fumbled on the rubber, feeling grateful that the package was open as my hands were shaking badly. I positioned myself and pushed. Jeez it was hard work! It felt like pushing against a solid surface. Suddenly something gave in and my dickhead slipped in with a sudden ‘pop’ that made my whole body hum. He hissed and I was very afraid I had hurt him after all. So I held there. And held. Finally he croaked:
“Are you ok?”
I wheezed in a deep breath and felt a drop of sweat make it’s way down my nose.
“What do you mean ‘am I ok’?! It’s you I’m worried about!”
He gasped and wheezed just as much as I did now.
“Shit I’m fine, I just thought you weren’t when you stopped!”
I was shaking now from holding back.
“Are you sure?”
He reached down and spread his ass cheeks wide open.
“I’m sure! Now fuck me dammit!”
With deep sighs from us both, I slowly shoved in until I was at the hilt. God I never knew there was a feeling like this in the world! My heartbeat pounded in my head like a huge drum and my dick seemed to feel for my whole body. Every sensation from that tight place sent echoes through my entire being. I never even noticed it myself when I began thrusting. It felt like the most perfect and natural thing in the whole world. I don’t think I could have stopped for anything at that moment.
Luckily, Sam’s crying and begging only told me how much he loved it, and his voice rang through the room, spurring me on. The sexy sound of our moist flesh clashing together drove me quickly to the edge and I tumbled over when I heard Sam screaming at me:
“I’m coming babe!”
I collapsed on top of him, while I was still pumping my load deep inside him. I felt his dick twitch against my stomach and the wet spot forming between us.
We just lay like that for ages. Maybe hours, I don’t know. I think I even blacked out for a time. The first thing that penetrated my oxygen deprived brain, was Sam’s gentle hands stroking the back of my neck.
“God I love you so much.”
I smiled and wrenched my eyes open. They felt like they were glued shut. I could see Sam’s eyes catching some faint light form a streetlamp somewhere outside. Or maybe he was just glowing on his own. He kissed me so gently I hardly felt it and the moment was so tender it almost made me cry. I had to relieve the tension before I went mad, so I mumbled:
“Yeah, I bet you say that to all the guys.”
He laughed. God I loved hearing him laugh.
I felt the rubber slipping off as my dick slowly deflated and I tried to reach down for it, but found that my arms were tangled in the bedspread behind Sam’s head. Thankfully Sam felt it too, and quickly grabbed it before it escaped. We both giggled manically at the situation and ended up squeezed awkwardly into the bed beside each other. The wall was cold behind my back so I covered us both with Sam’s sheets. He snuggled up against me and sighed contently. I felt very comfortable too and felt myself getting sleepy. I was snapped out of it though by a loud banging on the door.
“If you fags are done screaming in there like a pair of fucking porn stars, then maybe the rest of us can get some sleep!!”
The angry male voice faded and footsteps thumped all the way down the hall.
Sam stiffened against me. I got slightly red in the face, but at least this saved me the trouble of telling everybody I was sleeping with my roommate. The whole college knew now anyway. I heard Sam sniffle.
“What’s up stud? Don’t tell me that asshole got to you?”
He shook his head.
“No it’s just… I’ll understand if you don’t wanna continue this.”
I rubbed my eyes and groaned. Still I couldn’t help grinning stupidly.
“Ok, let me get this straight… you’ve just been fucked sideways by me, making sure we were both loud enough for people at the Maiden’s Mug to hear us and now you tell me you’d understand if I went out there and tried to convince everyone that I didn’t just have the most incredible experience in my whole damn life!”
He looked at me and held his breath.
“You know I’m used to being the dumb one between us, but it seems more things than my sexuality have been shaken tonight.”
He sniffled again.
“But… I thought you just wanted to try. I didn’t think you’d want to start a relationship or anything. So I just went with it and enjoyed what you could give me.”
I felt slightly annoyed, but still amused.
“Seriously, in all the time you’ve known me, have you ever seen me treat my friends that shitty?”
He blinked surprised.
“No but… why would you want a relationship with someone you don’t love?”
I held his face in my hands and leaned in until our noses touched.
“When did I say that I didn’t love you?”
“You just said I was special to you…”
I was impatient for him to understand this.
“Yes, yes, but I’m still figuring this out. I’ve loved you as a friend for years, but the borders are pretty blurred right now. Aw man… how do I put this…”
I slid one hand behind his head and pressed his forehead against mine, as if I could mentally transfer my emotions to him.
“I love you. And sleeping with someone you love usually means a relationship, right? And… God I sound stupid.”
He giggled nervously.
“Ok! Bottom line! I want more, ok?”
I breathed heavily. Damn this feelings crap was hard! Sam kissed me and stroked my forehead.
“It’s ok Babe. We’ll just take it once step at a time.”
I could have cried. He had it totally wrong!
“No, no! That’s not what I meant! I mean that either I’m in this completely or not at all!
I started making my way clumsily out of the bed.
“What are you doing?”
I cursed under my breath about stupid twisted sheets and stumbled when I finally released one I could wrap around me.
“Babe?”
Sam’s voice told me all to clearly he didn’t have a clue what I was up to. No matter, he would get it soon enough. I twisted the sheet around my body like a lumpy toga, unlocked the door and stomped down the all too brightly lit hall. I got to the junction between the dorms, where most of the hallways of our dorm spread out from. A perfect place to announce something that would be heard all over the building.
I stopped there, cleared my voice and bellowed out as indecently loud as I could:
“Ladies and Gentlemen!!! I would like to announce that I now play for the opposite team! Yes Ladies and Gentlemen, I have just had hot, fabulous, sinful, sodomizing sex with my best friend and roommate Sam! So all you girls can just fuck off and cry about what you are missing, cause I’m now officially Sam’s boyfriend and fucktoy! I don’t care what you think, just wanna make sure we’re clear! Goodnight to you all!”
I took a deep bow and strode off back towards our room. I saw faces poking out of doors and heard distant wolf-whistles and applauses. I also heard an angry voice shout from another hallway:
“Whatever! Just shut the fuck up!”
Sam was standing in our doorway with a blanket around him and a stupid grin on his face.
“Holy crap, you didn’t just do that?!”
I bowed to him and grinned back.
“I most certainly did, my dear. And I’m not done yet!”
With that I grabbed him, swung him around and dipped him down like a dancing partner and kissed him passionately for the whole hall to see.
I’ve never been good at this feelings crap, but he finally got it.
And I certainly got to know myself better.