My best friend and next-door neighbor has been the best thing that ever happened to me. His name is Nathan and we got along great, from the moment we first met. I valued his friendship more than anything in the world. He and his family taught me what it is to love and receive love from others. I seemed to be a burden, an unwanted houseguest to my parents. If it hadn’t been for Nathan and his family, I would probably be a very unhappy man, unable and unwilling to let anyone in and because of that, lonely. I would never do anything to jeopardize that friendship, but I almost destroyed it. I didn’t set out to, but it almost happened anyway.
I met Nathan when I was seven and shortly after his entire family. He had four older brothers and I was amazed at how noisy and fun his house was. His mom was big on hugs, so was his dad. He worked hard and came home and showered then played with all of his boys. It was as if no matter how bad his day was he had more than enough time, patience and willingness to be with his family. A couple of years later, I was spending the night at his house and his brothers built us a fort in the living room out of pillows and blankets. His parents popped popcorn and let us watch movies. I had so much fun that night. And when Nathan’s parents hugged him good night, I felt a spear of jealousy hit me. Then they both gave me a big hug too. It was the best time and also the most uncomfortable time. It was awkward. I didn’t know what to do. I saw the parents exchange a look and they both kind of frowned a little. But from that point forward, they both made it a habit to hug me, every time I was around. It got to the point that within weeks I didn’t even notice it. I actually grew to expect it.
My parents had this habit of wandering off and leaving me on my own, but I would hang out with Nathan and it almost didn’t hurt. Then one day, Nathan’s mom, Darcy, got sick. And she got sicker and sicker. When we both turned twelve, she died. I felt like I’d lost the most loving mother in the world. She wasn’t even my mother and I grieved for her in ways I never thought possible. If I felt so much at her loss, I could only imagine what Nathan, his brothers, and father must have felt. I wanted to shut out the world and hide myself from any more pain. But Nathan’s family refused to let me do it.
What is so amazing is that Nathan’s dad, Caleb, just became closer and closer to his children. He went to work, just like always, but now he spent more time with them. He was warm and affectionate and took such good care of them. I really liked spending time in the house with them. I felt like one of the guys, loved and cared for like I never got at home. I even fought with Nathan’s older brothers. It was like a real family.
When I was thirteen, I slept over at the house again. Nathan and I were roughhousing. It was late, after three, and we were making a lot of noise. Caleb came out into the hall to see what was going on. We were watching one of those late night wrestling programs and trying to imitate some of the stuff they did. Caleb came right out and joined us, rolling around and tackling us, pinning us to the ground. It was fun and made me realize how shafted I was by my own family. My father? Wrestling with two kids late at night after we’d woken him up? Fat chance.
For a while, I stopped hanging around Nathan so much. My body was starting to mature and with it came the first stirrings of who I was sexually. What scared me was how my thoughts and dreams turned to Nathan’s family, most specifically, his father, Caleb. I wanted so badly to have someone give me some advice. If anyone else had been in my dream, I would have asked Caleb. But I couldn’t ask him.
A few days later, the choice was taken from me. Caleb showed up at my door, wanting to speak to my parents. He was taking his four boys to Disneyland and wanted me to come along. But my folks weren’t home. So Caleb asked why I stayed away. I just burst into tears. I was so confused. He hugged me up and rocked with me. I slowly and embarrassingly explained how confused I was and how I didn’t understand what was happening to my body, leaving out his involvement in my dreams. He smiled at me and explained it all to me. I kind of had an idea, but his telling me that it was normal helped. I didn’t mention that I thought I was gay. That was one hurdle I could do without.
I did go with them to Disneyland later that year. I had so much fun. I had never been on vacation before. My parents went and often. You hear on the news about negligent parents who leave their kids at home while they go on vacation and threaten the children with all sorts of dangers if they answer the phone or the door. My parents couldn’t be bothered to talk to me, but they did leave me alone, for weeks on end. By the time I was 16, I had forgotten what their voices sounded like. I just didn’t care. Caleb and Nathan were my family. And not a single member of that family minded that I spent more time there than at my own home. I’ve gotten so good at forging my parent’s name; no one knows that I was a mistake, the effects of a broken condom.
When I was seventeen, Nathan and I were in a small car accident. A drunk driver hit us from behind. Nathan got a few scrapes on his arm and face, but I hit my head. Caleb showed up with two of Nathan’s brothers. They all gathered around Nathan and cooed over him. I was in another exam room, but I could hear them. They were getting ready to release Nathan when Caleb found me. He came in my cubicle and asked if I needed a ride home. A doctor asked if Caleb was my father and when he found out he wasn’t, he was told that I couldn’t be released except into my family’s care. I looked away in shame; my family didn’t care about me. Caleb asked for a moment alone.
“Luc, where are you parents?”
I still couldn’t look at him. “I don’t know. I haven’t seen them since August.”
“What? This is god damn October!”
I felt a tear squeeze out of my eye and my voice crack as I spoke. “I know.”
“Shit! I can’t believe this. I knew your parents were crap, but never this. Is this the longest they’ve been gone?”
“No. They came home in August for a couple of days, but they’ve been gone since the end of April.”
“I don’t believe this. Parents are supposed to care for their children.” With those words, the tears came harder. “Luc, I’m going to have to call the police.”
That steeled my spine. “No! In three weeks I will be eighteen and it won’t matter anymore. I have some money saved. I’ve been working two jobs. I will simply move out and stay on my own. But I can’t if you bring the police into it.”
“That is why you haven’t been around so much? God! I have been so blind.”
That made me smile. He hugged me up and rocked me a bit. He really is the best of men. Nathan was released and Caleb had his brothers take him home. Because the hospital wouldn’t release me until morning without my parents there, Caleb stayed with me. He sat in my room and talked to me. He woke me up every couple of hours and made sure I was okay and didn’t have a concussion. By dawn I was so damn in love with him I couldn’t breath.
But this was one of those never to be situations. I knew how lonely he was. He didn’t date, hadn’t since his wife died. All I could think about was how lonely he must be, finding comfort in his hand, alone in his bed. That is all I had too, but I was a kid, I wasn’t used to the loving, gentle touch of a lover. I didn’t know what the difference between a warm body and a callused hand was. He did. And I loved him more for it. I don’t know why he shut himself off. But he was alone. Perhaps just as alone as I was.
The next day, my dad showed up, peeved that he had to call his vacation short. He signed me out, but Caleb caught him in the hall as I was getting dressed. I didn’t hear what they said, but after that, I had money for school waiting for me. I really wish I could tell Caleb how much I loved him, because that night in the hospital he had given me so much. I stayed home with my parents even after I turned eighteen.
For my eighteenth birthday, Caleb and family through me a small party. I had presents and my favorite foods for dinner. The fact that it wasn’t my real family didn’t matter. This was so much more than I’d ever had before these people came into my life. I would stay with them often after that night, just because they wanted me there. It feels good to be wanted. It makes you feel safe.
It was the middle of the night shortly after Christmas after my eighteenth birthday. I was sleeping over at Nathan’s when something woke me. I walked down the hall to Caleb’s door. It was open a crack and I peeked inside. I saw him lying half on his stomach, the sheets pooled around his ankles before he kicked them off his feet. He turned a bit more onto his stomach. Caleb had a pillow cradled under one arm, hooked under his chest.
I watched his underwear clad hips rock into the mattress a couple of times. My throat went dry. Then he reached down and lowered his briefs off his hips, gathered around the tops of his thighs. I could see the hair-dusted globes of his ass and the dark, fur-lined cleft dividing them. I was rock hard instantly. His balls and other areas were covered, hidden by the white cotton of his underwear, but he rocked gently against the mattress a couple more times and then moaned, deep and throaty. I felt my shaft twitch hard and expel some of my clear, pearly essence into the fabric of my shorts. Then I watched as Caleb brought his hand to his mouth and liberally coated it with his saliva. Then he lowered it under him, fisting himself. I watched as he rocked into his fist, imitating the fucking action, burying his nose, grinding it into the pillow half under him.
It was as if the pillow were a substitute for whomever he wanted to see. In that moment, I knew he was thinking of his wife, Darcy. I felt very ashamed at watching, but I couldn’t move. I watched as his ass clenched and released with each thrust of his pleasure. Within moments, he started to let out a deep set of moans, telling me he was close to the end. Then he sped up, pounding into his fist that much harder, bouncing the bed slightly. Then he pushed hard once, twice then let out a low keen and grunt of pleasure. He bucked a couple of times, expelling the last drips of semen with the last spasms of his orgasm. I watched as he trembled in the afterglow and I felt myself clench and I came hard into my shorts. I hadn’t even touched it and I was drenched in my release. I was about to leave when Caleb clenched the pillow harder and started to sob quietly. I understood that sound. I understood that pain. It was the sound of gut-wrenching loneliness. I crept back down the hall, feeling guilty for having invaded his privacy.
It was getting on March and Nathan and I were trying to decide on a college. We were both leaning towards Washington State, more to just be that far away from home. Nathan’s brother Adam went there. One weekend he had Nathan drive over to look over campus. The other brother’s were gone. Phil was in the Army and Jake was in the Navy. Frank was going to school in California. So Caleb was alone for the weekend. I didn’t want to stay home, so I went to see him.
When I got to the house, he didn’t answer, but I knew he was home. I let myself in with the key he had given to me. I found Caleb in the kitchen, sitting in his underwear with a glass in front of him and a mostly empty bottle of vodka. He didn’t keep alcohol in the house, he never had. So I knew that the amount gone from the bottle was recent. Caleb looked up at me. The look on his face made me so sad. He looked lost and in pain. I just wanted to hug him, stroke his hair or maybe kiss his cheek. But when I moved closer, he made me sit and gave me his glass and started drinking straight from the bottle.
“Luc, my boy. Did you know that I have been alone for six years?”
“Yes Caleb.” He was drunk and his words were slurred, but the raw pain was there.
“My wife and I were together for seventeen years.”
“I know. I’m sorry.”
“Me too. She was my first. Did you know that? She was my first. And only.” I didn’t say anything. I just let him talk. “We met in high school. And we waited. We waited until senior prom. And that night she made me a man and I made her a woman. I had already asked her to marry me. Then Andy was born, then Frank and Phil and Jake then Nathan. And I was so happy.”
“Then she got sick. I hated the cancer. I hated that it took her away from me. It wasn’t enough. It was supposed to be forever. I get so lonely; so, so lonely. I haven’t been with anyone else. But I can’t remember what it’s like anymore. I miss her so much, but I can’t remember making love to her. I wait so long, forcing myself to go without. But I can’t. I spend hours going over photo albums, trying to remember a time when we made love. Then I fuck my hand while holding her pillow. But it isn’t enough.”
I watched as Caleb broke down in sobs. He was so drunk and in so much pain. I just wanted to love him, but it wouldn’t happen. Then I watched as Caleb nose-dived into the table. He isn’t that much larger than me, only by a couple of inches and maybe thirty pounds. But it was a struggle getting him to his room. I pulled down the covers and lay him down. I went to cover him and he lay there, sprawled and vulnerable and so damn alone. I couldn’t help it. I kissed him. His lips tasted like vodka. But they were so warm.
I felt Caleb’s arms wrap around me like corded steel. I opened my eyes. His were shut. He pulled me down to him, tightening his clench. I lay against his big body, feeling him get hard beneath me. All I was wearing were a pair of sweats and a t-shirt. Caleb rolled me under him and kept kissing me. He reached his hands down and pulled down and off my sweats. I didn’t have underwear on. Then I felt him remove his briefs. He was lying on me naked. I could feel his hard length press into my hip. I felt the soft hair of his legs as they wedged between mine. He kept rocking his hips, moving between them, seeking my opening. He pushed forward and hit me under the balls. But there was no pussy opening there. I thought he would wake up.
But he didn’t. Caleb grabbed my hips and tilted them up. I hadn’t done this before, but I couldn’t stop him. I wanted this too much. I was a virgin, but I really wanted this. The fact that he was drunk, the fact that he was straight and grieving didn’t enter my mind. I blindly helped guide his hips to me as I kept kissing him.
I felt him move his hands from my hips, felt them slide up my body, skimming my shirt up, feeling the contours of my chest. My belly was dusted with baby fine hair and I had a small patch nestled between my nipples, but I was nowhere as hairy as Caleb. He moved his hands up and grasped my pecs, rotating and squeezing them, feeling the nipples and pinching them. I moaned deeply around the tongue thrusting into my mouth, mating with my own.
He pushed forward and encountered resistance. He pushed harder and harder, his thick, hard tip was leaking against me. His blunt thrusts smeared the pre-cum around and then he parted me. He didn’t stop, didn’t let me adjust, but pushed forward, driving into me, seating himself fully in three or four heavy, hard pulses. The searing pain had me wanting to pull away, push him away. But he was too heavy on me, had me wrapped in his arms. And he kept pushing into me. I felt him pulling out and then thrusting heavily. He was big. He was huge and thick and heavy with repressed longing. His body needed.
So I stayed put, letting him use my body, letting him sate his long denied needs. It didn’t take long, ten or eleven thrusts and he cried out. I could feel his body tighten. I could feel his enormous shaft twitch with each pulse of his orgasm. I started breathing again, thankful that it was over, knowing he would remove his body and stop invading me.
But I was wrong. Caleb remained erect inside me. And he continued thrusting into me after only a slight pause. He kept grunting and kissing me, holding my body to him. His first orgasm lubricated my insides and I took him easier. I felt his essence seeping around my ring, dribbling down the back of my ass, slicking his body so it entered and exited mine with ease. And the pain went away. He kept pounding into me, hard and fast. He removed his mouth from mine and buried it against my throat so I could hear his heavy moans. I wrapped my legs around his ass, pulling him closer, riding him and feeling my body climb to release. And then it happened. He was pumping savagely into me and I exploded. I shook hard under him, releasing heavily, spewing my seed between our slick and sweaty bodies.
He never stopped. He kept thrusting into me, over and over. It wasn’t until he had cum for the fifth time that he stopped and collapsed against my body. He passed out, still buried heavily inside me. I lost count of how many times my own body had released in ecstasy. Semen was slick between our bodies. It had run down my sides and pooled on the bed around me. It started to itch, but I was too exhausted to move. I slept too, with Caleb’s heavy snores in my ear and his heart beating strong against mine.
I slept until the first ray of dawn fell across my face. Then I was aware of where I was and what had happened. My body was sore. My hips were cramped from being against Caleb’s all night. He was heavy against my chest and he was still wedged inside me. I was stretched around him and felt myself, swollen and bruised where he had entered me so roughly. But I wouldn’t change anything. If this were all I was to have, it would be enough. Then I became aware that Caleb was no longer snoring. His body tensed over mine and he pulled his head up to look at me. Confusion warred with pain as he looked at me. Then I could tell when he became aware of where his penis was. Confusion turned to weariness.
“What the hell is going on? What are you doing in my bed?”
“Luc. What happened?”
“You were drunk last night when I stopped by. I was helping you to bed. You were telling me about Darcy and then you fell on top of me…” I let my voice trail off. He knew what had happened because he was still inside me. I was hoping he would get excited, maybe want to go for another round. Instead, once realization came to him, he sat away from me, pulling out fast. I couldn’t help it. I cried out. I was so stretched; all that Caleb had ejaculated into me came pouring out, mixed with a good dose of bright red blood. I looked down between my legs, the mixture pooled onto the sheet, lying atop more bloodstains. Well, he had been a little forceful.
I watched as horror crossed his face. He turned pale and sweat beaded on his lip. Then Caleb was running into the bathroom. I heard him retching. I wanted to go help and moved to do so, but the ache was a little too strong and I whimpered. Then I heard Caleb moan and then retch again. I stayed in place, hearing him clean himself up, including brushing his teeth.
I heard the bath turn on. He filled the tub up then came walking back into the room. He had cleaned himself up, sponge washing the dried cum from his body and the blood from his dick. He came to the bed and lifted me in his arms. He carried me to the bathroom and lowered me into the tub. The water was almost too hot. But he placed me there and then left me to soak for a few minutes. I heard him moving around his bedroom. I lay in the tub, letting the warm water sooth my aching hole and loosen and rinse away the dried cum on my own body. And then Caleb was back, still naked, and I watched as he moved towards me.
He was beautiful. I had seen him in his underwear and it had hinted at his manhood. But I had never thought it would be like it was, thick and long and heavy. I started to stir under the water, remembering the pleasure and forgetting the pain. For there had been pleasure, unbelievable pleasure, over and over again I had cum. Caleb dropped to his knees and grabbed a cloth and the soap and lathered the two together. Then he proceeded to wash me. He was so gentle. I could tell by the haunted look in his eyes that he was feeling guilty.
“It wasn’t rape. I wanted to be there, Caleb. I could have gotten away.”
“Luc, I don’t remember any of it. Not one bit.”
“I know you don’t. But you only hurt me for a minute. Aren’t all virgins supposed to bleed a little?” My try at levity was a dismal failure. He looked even more haunted than before.
“You hadn’t ever before? Not once?”
“No. I never had the opportunity before. I didn’t want to before.”
“But Luc, I didn’t know it was you. I didn’t know you were gay.”
“So, does it change anything? Do you not care about me anymore because I’m gay?”
“Of course not. But I hurt you. I would rather cut off my arm than hurt you.”
“It didn’t hurt for long. And you obviously needed to be with someone. I’m glad it was me who was with you.”
“I don’t drink Luc. I really don’t. I was just so damn lonely. I am going to miss you and Nathan when you go away to school. I’m going to be alone. So I was feeling sorry for myself.”
“I don’t mind. I know you were lonely. You talked a lot before you passed out. It only made my feelings for you stronger.” With that he looked up sharply at me, staring into my eyes, trying to find an explanation. The question was obvious in his eyes. “Yes Caleb. I love you. I have been in love with you for some time.”
“Oh Luc. Why?”
“You sat by me all night in the hospital. You are the only who ever gave a damn about my well-being. You weren’t just my friend. You cared for me. You cared about me. I love you.”
With that, Caleb pulled the drain on the tub and grabbed a towel. He helped me stand and started drying my body. Then he pulled me back to his bedroom. He lay down on the bed and pulled me on top of him. I got hard instantly. I kissed him, but he didn’t respond. I pulled back to look at him. He told me it was my turn. I got harder and I felt myself drip on him. But I wanted him to at least like the idea of sleeping with me.
Caleb wrapped his legs around me and pulled me to him, but I pulled away. I didn’t think he would like it if I tried to arouse him, but I could at least make it good for him. I stood and went back into the bathroom, slightly hobbled from the ache in my ass. I found some Vaseline and came back to the bed. Caleb looked oddly at me, but stayed where he was. I knelt between his legs. I took some of the thick jelly on my fingers and smeared it around Caleb. Then I pulled another huge dollop out and pushed into him. I moved in and out with one finger, adding a second then third when he shifted, letting out a slight groan. I watched as his shaft began to thicken. That is when I knew I could move forward.
I added more Vaseline to my hand and fisted my shaft, coating and greasing my cock. I pushed into him, letting the jelly do its work. I felt him squeeze me as I watched Caleb grunt. Then he stood at full attention and I pushed further into him. I felt a hard ridge as I pushed forward and when I hit it, Caleb shuddered under me, crying out with a muffled curse. I pulled his thighs over my hips, letting him lock his ankles behind my knees. I pushed into him completely, staying in place, watching his face and feeling his body accommodate me. Then he did the most amazing thing, he pushed against me and moaned. I watched as a pearly drop of his essence beaded then dribbled down his hard, flared head and dripped into his thick, soft, lavish pubic hair.
I felt him grip me and heard him cry out. I kept moving, the ache in my ass keeping me from getting too close to the end. And at that moment I realized I could build for a long time, pushing into Caleb, feeding our pleasure. And I did just that. I moved a hand up and stroked his body, feeling the hairy planes of his chest, pushing slightly against the muscles of his abdomen, feeling them bounce and quiver with pleasure. I took a nipple between my fingers and rolled the hard nub between thumb and forefinger, tweaking his pleasure, feeling his chest bellow with his ragged grunts of ecstasy.
I was hoping to last, hoping that my uncomfortable ass would help dampen my desire, but I was building fast. Feeling the warm, moist channel and greasy jelly surround my shaft, feeling his wonderful, graceful, natural inclination to take my flesh into his, had me moaning with each forward thrust only to gasp as I pulled back. His hands became restless as he moved them over me, skimming my shoulders and back, caressing my chest and nipples, feeling my stomach, reaching through and sifting through my pubic hair before cupping my ass and pulling me into him faster and faster. Then I felt Caleb quiver under me, his entire belly and hips and groin pulsed with the impending orgasm.
I felt him squeeze me as his face contorted and his voice became loud screams of pleasure. I watched his shaft twitch hard with the first expulsion of his seed, quickly followed by eight other heavy pulses, twitching his shaft, forcing his body to release over and over. With the final grunt of pleasure, Caleb collapsed on the bed and pulled me down to him. He moved his head closer to me, grasping the back of my head, pulling me to his lips. He kissed me, grinding his lips with mine, wedging his tongue into my mouth, dueling with it, sucking on it, adding infinitely tender sensations to shoot through me. I felt my belly tighten, pulling itself tighter, curving me inward as my thighs tensed and clamped against his ass. My cock got thicker and harder than I had ever felt before. I pulled off his mouth only to moan in one long, loud, deep reverberation of pleasure as I came hard, filling his body with my essence, my seed, my soul, my love.
I collapsed against his sweaty chest, my face burrowing in the damp, matted hair. I was trembling. I could die at this moment and be happy. I was sore. My muscles were tired and I don’t think I could get another erection to save my life. But good God I was so happy at that moment. I nestled against Caleb’s chest, wanting so badly to go to sleep. But it wasn’t meant to be. I felt Caleb still hard and steely, grinding into my hip.
I looked up into his face and asked what was going on. He explained that he had always been able to go all night, three or four times at least, and that he stayed erect until he collapsed in exhaustion. I guess I had awakened a sleeping giant. But I was too tired and wasn’t hard enough to go at it again. So I slid my body out and down his. I met his shaft, still dribbling thick pearls of semen. I took him in my mouth, feeling and tasting the soft, velvety tip. I took him deeper and felt myself accept all of him as I moved further and further down his thick shaft. “My God Luc, no one has ever…” I kept moving. “I heard about this, but never thought, …” I swirled my tongue around him. “Oh, Luc. I never knew. Oh yes, do that again …” I sucked hard at his flared crown, flicking my tongue over and over against it. “Oh Luc! Oh Luc! Oh Luc! Go faster. Oh you are so …” I kept moving, feeling him tighten and climb towards release. “Luc! Luc! Luc …” I felt him spasm as his shaft twitched hard in my mouth. Then I tasted the deep, musky, masculine flavor of Caleb. He filled my mouth and the excess trickled down my chin, finding its way into the silky, thick pubic hair on the underside of his cock. His shaft fell from my mouth, still hard, still aroused. I climbed up his body, tasting his lips lightly, letting him decide to accept his own flavor. He did, taking my lips in a hungry kiss in which he lapped at my mouth then chin, looking for his flavor until there was no more.
I ached with want. I had risen back to his challenge. I entered him in one thrust, my previous release and the jelly allowing me full access. I pumped into him, feeling Caleb meet me, push against me, pull my body to him. Then my knee slipped while I was thrusting up. I hit a bump inside of Caleb. He cried out in a roar of absolute bliss, chanting my name, begging me to do it again. So I did. Over and over I pushed into that spot, knowing that his climax would hit again and soon. Then he was clenching on me and spewing his essence between us.
I kept moving, not letting him rest. I pulled almost out and gave him a couple minutes of long, hard strokes. Then I pulled back and bumped his prostate fast and hard for a few seconds, watching a fourth orgasm rock Caleb’s body. He was sweaty and panting beneath me, but still steely hard. I gave him five long strokes before I assaulted his prostate again. I felt my own orgasm approach and I knew I was powerless to stop it. I kept pounding that tight nub, willing it to be enough to bring Caleb relief and release. Caleb started moaning and crying out with each pulse of my hips. I started chanting his name as the end drew close. I felt myself thicken and my entire body tightened. Then I watched Caleb spurt one last time an almost water-like stream of release, spraying his face and chest and my chest with his last spurt of cum. His orgasm lasted for several minutes, rocking him with aftershocks as I slowed my thrusts until I softened and slipped out. I fell onto his chest and he wrapped me in his arms. I wanted so badly to slip into oblivion. But the shout from the door woke me and thrust me into a nightmare.
“What the hell is going on?” The words were spoken so softly, but the speaker was less than calm. Nathan stood in the doorway, shock and horror warring on his face. Caleb stood up and walked towards his son. His chest was still dripping with his multiple releases. At that moment, I became aware of the raw, raunchy smell of semen and sex. And at that moment I felt shame. The condemnation that I felt coming from my best friend was strong. Caleb told Nathan he would talk to him in a few minutes and shut the door. He turned to me and suggested strongly that I leave. Things were so out of control so quickly. I found myself dressed and home in a matter of minutes. I was still wet and sticky under my clothing. I also knew that my decision on colleges was made and I wouldn’t be going to the same school as my best friend.
I waited for someone, either of them to come to me, tell me what happened. But the hours stretched into days. I found myself ignored at school by Nathan, but Caleb didn’t say a word. He wasn’t home the two times I tried to see him and he never called. I didn’t realize how much I would miss my ‘family.’ But I did. All of them had become so important to me. Graduation came and went and then I stopped even seeing Nathan. I got a second job during the summer, just to fill the lonely hours. I accepted the college in Bellingham, at the opposite end of the state from where Nathan was going.
That summer, Frank, while home from school, came to see me. He explained that Nathan was so upset that Caleb had promised to not speak to me. Strangely enough, I loved him more for it. It hurt. It hurt more than anything to have been someone’s choice and not making the grade, but I still loved him. Frank understood. He told me he just wanted his father to be happy. And he told me that he just looked more miserable and lonely than ever before. I really wanted to go to him, but I respected Nathan’s wishes.
School started and I threw myself into my studies, trying to kill the lonely ache inside me. I even dated. I met this great guy who was funny and warm and intelligent. But nothing physical ever happened. We kissed a couple of times, but there just wasn’t anything there for me. We became really good friends instead. I told him all about what had happened. Trent tried to tell me that nothing would happen between Caleb and myself but maybe a few stolen weekends. In my mind I knew that. But my heart wasn’t ready to let go yet.
I had decided to live in an apartment by myself. I just wasn’t really feeling up to living with someone else who couldn’t stand me. So I studied and worked and saw Trent from time to time. And I was so damn lonely that I ached from it. I would lie in bed at night and remember that single day of perfection, that one moment of extreme joy. I was afraid that the memories would fade because I played them over and over. But it was all I had. All I feared I would ever have.
It was coming up on Christmas. I had spent several of them alone. The holiday just never attained importance in my life because it never was what it should be for me. But this year I felt even more alone. Since I had my own place, I decided to decorate. I had always loved how Nathan and his family decorated their house so lovingly. It was such a magical time for them. So I strung lights and put up a small tree. And when I was all done, I realized I had no one to buy a present for. Do you have any idea how depressing some Christmas carols are? ‘I’ll Be Home for Christmas’ especially.
I was walking through the mall, looking for the perfect gift for Trent when I spied a giving tree. Pick a tag and buy a gift for a child in need. I actually smiled when I saw them. I pulled at least 15 of them down. I had so much fun that day, shopping for various children. I dropped off my packages at the designated place and I got the biggest hug from the worker there. Some of the pain lifted from me and I hugged her back.
It was Christmas Eve and I was sitting at home alone. Everything was closed and most people were with friends and family. I don’t think I have ever felt so alone. So I snuggled into a blanket while on my couch and watched movies. I saw ‘A Christmas Story’ and ‘It’s a Wonderful Life.’ It wasn’t enough, but it was okay.
A little before midnight, I was contemplating going to bed. But I never made it off the couch. I was awakened a couple of hours later by a knocking at my door. When I opened it, there stood a vision before me. Caleb. He looked awful. He needed to shave and he had lost a few pounds. But he was still the most beautiful man I had ever seen. I was so surprised to see him that I just stared, open-mouthed. He smiled so big at me and stepped inside and hugged me to him so tightly. I wrapped my arms around him and felt at peace for the first time in the eight months since last I had seen him.
He cupped my face in his hands and his smile trembled. There were tears pooling in his eyes, emphasizing the brilliant blue. “I couldn’t leave you alone on Christmas.” And he kissed me with just a simple brushing of lips. “I’ve missed you so much, Luc. I have been so damn miserable. But I promised Nathan. And I just can’t keep that promise.” And he kissed me some more, deeper and wetter. I felt his tongue brush mine, and the world seemed so right at that moment. Then I felt Caleb, hard and proud against my hip. I gripped his butt and pulled him closer, so he could feel my heated response. He groaned into my mouth. He murmured in my mouth. “I want to make love to you, Luc. Over and over, all night long.” My response was my pulling him to my bedroom and my bed.
He ripped at our clothes, frenzied in his need. I thought things were going to be fast and rough, but the moment our naked bodies touched on the bed, he slowed and gentled. He touched and stroked my body, tasting and feeling the contours and planes of muscle. I was panting so hard against him. I felt myself thicken against his hip. He rolled me underneath him and cupped my body to his with gentle motions. He was on top of me, pinning me to the bed, holding me so close to his body without adding any of his weight to my frame. He held up a jar of Vaseline, and I laughed. He opened it and smeared it around his shaft. Then he was pushing forward, parting me, seating himself gently inside, waiting for me to stretch and accept all of his impressive size. And I did.
For the next countless minutes, Caleb moved inside me incredibly slowly. He built my pleasure so high, that each time I exploded; it took forever to come down from it. And only after I had released three times did he let his own release follow. I felt his shaft twitch hard along its entire length inside me with each jet of his seed. And each of those heavy spasms was accompanied by a deep, breathy moan delivered in my ear while he gripped my body so tightly to his. And with the last thrust of his culmination, he collapsed against my body, letting me feel his weight as he collapsed in exhaustion. Even though he was still rock hard and embedded deep inside me, he was asleep in seconds, making me realize he had gotten as little sleep as I the last few months. I soon followed.
I awoke a couple of hours later with Caleb still hard inside me. He was stirring from sleep, coming out of it faster when I wiggled my hips. But instead of resuming his thrusting, he pulled out and kneeled between my thighs. He took his little jar and smeared a generous dollop of jelly on my aching shaft and then sat on me. He buried me so deep inside him that I cried out. Then he began to ride. He was in control. He arched his back so far that I almost thought he would reach his ankles with his shoulders. It added such amazing stimulation to my shaft, but when seconds later Caleb’s cock released a heavy jet of semen, I knew he was grinding my shaft against his prostate. He continued to move, and not too much longer, perhaps three minutes, he came again and then again. With that last release, he squeezed me so tightly and ground his hips so hard against me, that my own release was propelled out of me. Caleb sat on my hips, his head tilted back. I watched as his breathing evened then slowed. I also watched his huge cock slowly go limp, appeased with the marathon of hot sex we had just shared. When he looked into my eyes, there were tears in them again. He looked down at me. “I love you Luc.” And then he lay down beside me, wrapped me in his arms, and cuddled with me.
Before dawn, Caleb woke me and we showered together. We got dressed and he drove us to his house in Seattle. I was nervous, but Caleb assured me that there was no other choice; his family was going to have to accept what would make him happy. It wasn’t an easy morning, but all the brothers but Nathan accepted. Frank told me he just wanted his dad to be happy, and he hadn’t been, not since the day his wife died.
Caleb worked for the state ecology department. So he got a transfer to the Bellingham office and we stayed in my little, one bedroom apartment. The sex was phenomenal and happened for hours each and every night and sometimes in the mornings on weekends. Thank god my apartment was on the first floor and at the end, or I am sure we would have had complaints from the neighbors.
Nathan did come around. We aren’t as close as we once were. But what we have is somehow better. He respects me and he is appreciative of what I bring his father. We do get strange looks, Caleb and I. After all, he is twenty-two years older. But I don’t care. And neither does he. This afternoon, we both sat at Nathan’s wedding, his father and best friend, cheering him on, both of us wanting him to be as happy as we are.